Chapter 22

Years are passing by, days are whizzing by,
Yet I still disobey the Great Being MOST HIGH.

How astonishing am I?
I know I cannot live forever,
But still for the glitter and glamour of this world I am eager.

Despite my sins making my heart so filthy,
I still don't feel so guilty!

With knowledge of the hereafter still for the worldly temptations I fall,
Not realising that in the aakhirah it will not benefit me at all.

Signs of the last day are becoming evident,
And drawing near is the day when every human  infront of their Lord will be present.

My heart should fear the day the earth will shake,
The day the firm mountains will crumble and break.

When the mountains will be scattered dust and fly,
When the oceans will turn to fire and the the colour of the sky will change, Those deemed to be low,will be high.

- Jawhariy

A tense atmosphere enveloped the three siblings, as they sat in the living room.

Suhaib's hands were clenched into fists, he gritted his teeth as he looked down at the carpeted floor.

Zahra and Taeeba sat opposite him. Zahra's hands were crossed on her chest, and Taeeba played with her fingers nervously.

"Why the hell don't you two just let me be!"

Suhaib said for the third time that night, his anger was increasing and he didn't want to hurt his sisters further by swearing them.

Taeeba huffed angrily, she stood up abruptly, giving her big brother a look filled with disappointment.

"I dont know what happened to you Suhaib, but you need to realise that it's hurting us all and interfering with the peace of our lives! Zahra is a married woman now! She shouldn't be here trying to solve our problems, because you're so stubborn and selfish! She has a life of her own Suhaib and your behaviour is going to affect her marriage as well, she can't keep running here to be your saviour! So get your act straight and realise your mistakes, before you drown in your evil doings and it's too late!"

She said her salaam, then walked away, letting the tears roll down her face.

She missed her sweet and caring brother...she really didn't want her father to die!

She placed her hand on her mouth, as loud sobs raked through her body.
She sprinted up the stairs, allowing her tears to fall rapidly. 

Her sobs didn't go unheard, both Zahra and Suhaib heard.

Zahra swallowed the painful lump in her throat, as she got up and sat next to a very guitly looking Suhaib.

They exchanged no words, she simply rested her head on his shoulder and cried her heart out.

Her brother had changed so much and her father was extremely ill, she couldn't take it any longer, as sob after sob raked through  her body.

Suhaib wrapped his arm around her shoulder, he rested his head on hers, closing his eyes, as a lone tear slipped  from his left eye.

What had become of him?

He had no idea about his fathers sickness, he had no idea that information of just one shocking event could trigger his fathers death, even though Zahra had intended to inform him, she held back, maybe now wasn't a good time to tell him, he only just softened up, he might only drown himself into more evil, she would wait for the right time.

Taahir stood by the living room door, his heart extruded in pain when he saw his wife bawling her eyes out.

He really wanted to console her, he hated  it when she cried, but he let her be. He hadn't seen this side of Suhaib in a while, and he needed to leave them alone.

Silently he made his way back upstairs, shutting their bedroom door, he snuggled under the covers, missing his wifes warmth, he didn't know when he felt into a deep slumber. All he remembered was, a soft peck on his cheek, and a warm body snuggling  into him and him wrapping his arm around her waist, as he fell into a blissful sleep.

The  music pumped in the car, as they drove to the usual night club  they hang out at.

Suhaib sat silently through out the ride, as the rest of them spoke and chuckled.

His heart felt heavy and he felt exhausted, he had hardly slept the night before, thinking of how his sisters cried.

Were they crying that much for him only or was there something he didn't know about?

He was hardly ever home, it could be something else...his heart beat quickened at the thought. If there was , Zahra would have told him, isn't it?

He sighed, who was he kidding, he hadn't let anyone even speak to him.

Fayaaz nudged him.

"Hey, what's up?"

Suhaib shook his head.

"Nothing serious."

"Well it clearly looks like it's something serious if it's bothering you this much."

Suhaib ignored him.

"You know you can talk to me about anything man."

Suhain nodded, noticing Imraan looking at them from the passenger seat.

He was the closest to Fayaaz, he wasn't as bad  as the other two, abit dirty mouthed and dirty minded, but overall he wasn't that  bad, he knew he  could tell him anything.

"Some other time."

Fayaaz nodded.

"Whenever you're ready."

Once they reached the club, they parked the car and jumped off.

Just as Suhaib closed the door, a body slammed into his.

When he felt her assets pressed up against his chest, immediately he  knew  who it was.

"Hey baby!"

Ameera whispered, kissing his  cheek.

"Hey"

He replied glumly.

He really wasn't in a mood for her right now, sure he was  attracted to her and they  had kissed two or three times, but she  was getting abit clingy and he disliked it.

He looked down at her, gently removing her hands from his  chest.

She looked hurt, but quickly smiled.

"Had a rough day?"

She asked sweetly.

He simply nodded folowing the rest of the boys.

She sighed, quickening her pace, as she swayed her hips walking ahead of them, her tight leather pants leaving nothing for the imagination, her top that showed off her skin, caused the boys to whistle. 

Imraan smirked.

"One hot girl  she  is man! Tell me when you're done with her Suhaib, I really want to have a taste of her."

Suhaib sneered at him, disgusted by his  train of  thoughts.

Surely  she was not the most modest girl, but she  wasn't something to toy with.

It was normal for men to feel attracted to women physically, but to say it and intend to caryy it out was a whole  different thing.

He didn't have feelings for Ameera, he didn't love her, it  was just an attraction, yet he still couldn't stand when they spoke about her or any other woman that way.

What the heck was he doing dwindling away his life with these boys?

Despite his thoughts, he followed the boys into  the club, the loud music and blinding lights assaulting his eyes and ears.

He separated himself from the boys, going to  his usual spot  at the bar, where he noticed Ameera, or Amy as she liked to be  called, sitting on one  of the bar stools, swirling the alcohol in her cup. She brought it up to her lips, sipping it slowly, as her gaze met his.

She looked away as he approached her and sat next to her.

Her top exposed her navel, showing off her belly ring, and her neck line, as always plunged low enough to view her busts.

He looked away, not wanting his emotions to take over.

"I'm sorry! "

He apologised, indicating to the bar attendent to get him his usual drink.

She glanced at him, giving him a fake  smile.

"It's okay. I know you're like all those other men, that use me, have a good time and then leave. Just tell me when you want me and we can do what you want and finish this off. We can forget we ever met after that!"

She spat, tears filled her eyes.

He clenched his hands in anger.

How dare she think that way about him?

Her teary gaze met his hard gaze.

"I thought you were different Suhaib!"

Tears rolled down her cheeks.

He sighed, his anger dissipating.

He hated whem girls  cried. Yesterday  his sisters and now her, he held her soft hand in his own, rubbing her hand with his thumb.

"Hey Amy, don't think like that. You know I'm not like the other guys. I was just upset about something and I didn't want anyone around me at that time."

She kept her haze on her lap, not meeting his gaze.

"I'm sorry Amy, you know I'm not like the other guys."

He said softly.

She looked up at him, seeing the sincerety in his eyes.

She leaned towards him as he hugged her tightly.

She pulled away after a while, wiping away her tears.

She sniffled. 

"You know Suhaib..."

She began, a distant look in her eyes, as she looked at all the bottles of alcohol.

"I wasn't always this bad girl that I am right now. There are alot of times I miss the old me, I miss being the good Ameera, Suhaib and I wish I could go back to the old me. I really miss my family you know..."

She trailed off, as more tears splutered from her eyes. 

Suhaib held her hand.

"Where's your family?"

"They shifted to  Cape Town, three years ago and left me behind, all on my own. They disowned me and refused to listen to me, they cut off all ties with me, for something that was not my fault. When I needed them the most, they left me all alone!"

She choked on her tears, as he looked at her pitifully. 

That's why we should never judge a book by a cover. He thought she was just  a bad girl, the thought never crossed his mind, that perhaps something in her past led to the way she was now.

"A friend of mine felt sorry for me. Her family took me in, they looked after me, treated me like their own child, but of course I missed my family. Once I completed my studies, I left my friends home, I didn't want to be a burden, I wanted to be independent and despite her parents disapproval, I began paying them back for the year that they paid for my studies. Her father found  a better job, with a better pay, so they moved to Port Elizabeth. I was then left completely alone. It's  not easy to remain good when you have no good influence at all, I tried at first but I was very weak. I got involved in the wrong company and before I  realised my grave mistake, I was clubbing and drinking. It's a surprise that I kept myself away from drugs though. I did the worst possible things, even lost whatever little dignity I had left to one or two men."

She bowed her head in shame, as she said that.

She wasn't proud of herself at all, she had become so disgusting, she sometimes she wished to commit suicide, but she never had the courage to take her own life.

Suhaib looked at her speechless, he didn't know what to say...what was he supposed to say? He himself was drowning in darkness, unlike her he had succumbed to the temptation of drugs, the only thing he hadn't done was fulfil his desires in a haraam way, and he feared if he didn't stop that would happen very soon.

"Why did your parents disown you?"

He asked softly.

She squeezed his hand, a flash of pain passed her eyes, tears began pouring out of her eyes.

He saw the shattered look in her orbs, his heart dropped when he heard what she said.

"I was raped.... by my fathers best friend."

* * *

😭 poor Ameera.

Sorry for the late update 😚😚

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❤ J