Mudan

The days thereafter were grey and lonely.

The Rangers were less pushy than before, strangely focusing on healing us. I watched the twins come to the infirmary for head checkups at Sage Maisu's request, but they'd never acknowledge me. Instead they'd pretend as though I were not in the room, not sparing me a second glance.

But at least I saw them.

I hadn't seen Shen since that day. Since the day he dropped his hand from mine. Since he became himself again. I didn't even know if I could call him Shen anymore. That name was given by a monster, and it took the life of a child and used it for his own benefit.

Now that Shen was himself, I knew he was no longer keeping his distance because of Old Master's hold.

The empty pit in my chest only swelled at night, when I was really forced to think about everything I saw. Things were never going to be the same after this. Nothing would. And it was all his fault. I lied awake, trying to sob so at least I'd feel something, but nothing came.

Nothing. Surrounded by nothing. Feeling nothing. Being left with nothing. That's exactly how Old Master wanted things. He wanted us to have nothing but him.

But now we just had nothing.

On the fifth day, my wound closed up and I no longer needed to stay in the infirmary. Sage Maisu came to remove my bandages and I wondered what would happen to me now that my health was restored.

I could probably try and run again, but now that Shen and the twins were here, I had a feeling doing that would be pointless.

"You're all set now, no more tears or splitting," Sage Maisu said with a cheerful smile. Unfortunately I couldn't match his excitement.

These people brought our lives crashing down onto us and didn't have a second thought about it. To them this was just information to get us to join them. But to us, it was pure sorrow.

One of the underlings strolled into the room, his curly, mop-like hair bouncing as he moved. His freckles were the first thing I noticed on his face, next to his pointed brown eyes that were right on me.

"Aye, Sage. She ripe for the picking?" He asked with a chuckle. What a weird accent. I couldn't for the life of me remember his name.

"Oh, goodness no, Fachmann Furn. She has just replenished her health, you are going to have to wait at least one more day for that," Sage Maisu replied. There's the name, Furn. "Tell Weise Hana to not apply pressure at all. I hope you aren't here for that purpose?"

Furn shook his head. "Oh of course not, Sage. I'm just here to escort the prisoner to her new cell."

I stepped back and frowned. "You're going to put me in a cell?" I exclaimed.

Furn gave me a long blank look. "That was a joke. I'm just taking you to where you'll be staying."

I scowled, scoffing to myself. What kind of moron makes a joke like that. Sage Maisu shook his head at Furn with a sigh.

"Don't mind him. He's not very good at jokes. You're not going to be put into any cell."

Even though Sage Maisu had been taking care of me, I barely trusted his word. After all, I was still being blackmailed to be here, I could at least hold my suspicion.

We left the infirmary after I awkwardly bowed to Sage Maisu. I couldn't bring myself to verbally thank him and he must have known it, because he accepted my half-hearted bow as if it was the greatest honour.

I don't even know what to feel about this place anymore.

I followed Furn down the halls of the massive Ranger building, where it felt like every pair of eyes were staring at me. And they were, shamelessly too.

They scanned my frame as I walked by, eyes sharp with disdain. I grew aggitated, my fist twitching as the glares on me intensified. This wasn't Sueyin where I could just go up and fight anyone I didn't like.

"Why are they staring at me?" I asked with a scowl. "It's annoying."

"Because you're a wanted criminal," Furn answered casually, as though we were discussing the weather. I paused in my tracks and he heard my slippers halt, stopping as well.

"Wanted criminal?" I questioned, my brain feeling slow. Then, conveniently we were next to a notice board, where Furn pulled a paper off and held it up at my face.

A sketch of me stared right back at me, with no name attached, only the words "Woman Wanted For Relation to Palace Killers. Reward: One Million Doil Notes. Bring back alive. Highly dangerous, only report to Moon Ranger or Military Personnel."

Redness crept over my face. Furn burst into laughter as he stuck the paper back up onto the board. "We should leave this up here for jokes. But there's your answer. Now you know you shouldn't leave your room after we get there."

We started walking again. "That sounds like prison. Why can't I leave my room?"

"Because you're a wanted criminal..." Furn sang slowly, adding a whistle. "And the Rangers here aren't exactly in favour of... Clan members."

I scoffed. Like we were a fan of them. "Then why are we here?"

Furn shrugged his shoulders. "Don't ask me. I'm just a part of the squad, but judging by Hana's decisions... it looks like she's going for reform."

"Reform?" I repeated, utterly lost.

"Well, that's kind of the Rangers shtick. Nearly all the Moon Rangers in this building are ex-convicts, criminals or undesirable people who were given the chance to reform. The Moon Rangers take people who have nothing going for them and turn them into people worthwhile, so that's probably going to happen to you."

I let out a surprised laugh. I couldn't believe my ears. Ex-convicts and criminals, huh? Sounded all too familiar to what we lived through. But instead of criminals, it was children with seemingly no family.

"Why are you laughing?" Furn narrowed his eyes at me and asked defensively. "You better not be judging, you've got a heap of murders stacked against you mate."

My laughter was quick to die down. I leaned forward into his chest as we walked and hissed. "What do you know about that?"

Furn smirked down at me. "You forgetting where we are? I've seen it all. Murders of government officials, judicial officers... anyone who gets in your Clan's way and ideals."

I felt embarrassed, I didn't know why. I felt like I wanted to prove myself to this random man who was most likely only mocking me for fun.

"You don't know anything," I ended up sounding defensive. "We didn't just kill important people, but people who threatened us. Our livelihoods. People who killed our culture and people."

Furn rose an eyebrow at me, pausing in his tracks. "After all you saw, you're still defending that place?"

"Not the place, but the people. You don't know what our lives were like, all you've done is intrude in our minds and look through biased lens. You don't know what we've felt and how we've lived."

I took a step forward and subtly glared at him. "So maybe before jumping to conclusions about us, why don't you actually ask and learn."

"You're right, I don't know you and what any of you have been through," Furn said with a shrug. "But what I do know is that Hana is putting faith in you. So if you don't want to make her regret it, you need to let go and cooperate."

What does that even mean?

I was unable to question further. Furn kept walking ahead of me, leaving me to trail after him like a wandering dog. He stopped at a separate building from the main area.

"This is the accomodation and where you'll be staying," Furn told me and gestured to a door. "Your roommate's in there. Go ahead and say hi."

When I made no move, Furn opened the door himself. Right as I peaked in the doorway, I looked straight into Chu's sharp green eyes that were already scowling at me.

"You've got to bloody be joking," she groaned aloud. "I thought you were bringing my brother to room with me, Moonie?"

Furn faked a smile at the not-so-endearing nickname. "Sorry, love. No co-ed room arrangements allowed. You two are like sisters, right? You've been at the same Clan your whole life, so go ahead and catch up."

Furn shoved me into the room with one hand and quickly swung the door shut after. I ended up knocking into Chu and she shoved me off, having me fall straight onto a bed.

She turned away from me, her face dressed in disgust as usual. "Shen's rooming with Bhen I don't know where so don't bother asking me about him," she said.

"I wasn't going to ask you about him," I muttered.

Chu scoffed but said nothing. The tension in the room made me want to suffocate. I couldn't bring myself to be mean to her, knowing what my father did to her and her family. I only felt sad, knowing I was a direct reminder infront of their faces.

"I'm sorry," I said out of nowhere. Chu turned around and had a weird look on her face, like she was unsure if she heard correctly.

"What?" She asked, stunned for the first time.

"I'm sorry. For everything. For everything that happened at the temple and what happened after. You guys didn't deserve what happened to you. I wish—"

"Why are you apologizing?" Chu asked me, making me blink dumbly. "Are you the one who killed my parents and kidnapped me and my brother and brainwashed us?"

Chu and Bhen blamed me for what happened at Sueyin. I didn't want it to happen again. I didn't say it but she seemed to read it on my face.

"Its not your fault," she admitted with difficulty. "It's no one's fault really. No one but that cocker."

I didn't say anything more. At least she didn't blame me. Though now the guilt felt slightly worse.

"Are you okay?" I asked warily, feeling like I was treading dangerous waters. I had never been this civil with Chu all my life. It was definitely a new experience for me.

She gave me an obvious look. "Of course not. I want to kill him and myself. I can't bloody sleep. I hate myself and cry every night. Do you feel great?"

Her tone was sarcastic and condescending as usual. I didn't know how to respond. I was just trying to hold it together.

"I..."

"I guess we can finally bond now, right? Your father killed both your and my mother, so we should be best friends," Chu said in the worst tone that made me regret ever opening my mouth to her. "Give me break, Little Bird. Alright? Let's not do this right now."

"What is wrong with you?" I asked her genuinely.

"I'm grieving, that's what. And right now? I'm hungry and I don't feel like talking to you."

Chu slowly walked out of the room, slamming the door behind her. Everyone grieved differently, that I knew. But deep down no one wanted to be alone with all those emotions. It was a black, all-consuming cloud. It never truly disappeared, but having people you cared about to hold your hand helped distract you of the clouds existence.

I don't know what possessed me, but I got up from the bed and decided to follow Chu. She was a distance away and didn't look behind her as she walked, making her easy to follow.

Is she going to Shen and Bhen?

Oh, Nine Hells, if she was going to them I would have to turn back. I wasn't ready to face Shen yet. Not after what I witnessed.

But as she furthered, I noticed her going into a place with other Rangers. That can't be a good thing.

I ran after her now, catching her by the shoulder just as she pushed open the double doors to the building. We both attracted stares from the Rangers, their eyes almost collectively scowling and glaring at us. It was the canteen. This was where they got their meals.

Chu spun around and glared at me, knocking my hand off her shoulder. "What part of 'I don't want to talk to you right now' translated to follow me in that thick head of yours?" She asked bitterly.

I rolled my eyes at her. "I don't think we're supposed to be here."

"I said I'm hungry, so I'm getting food. If you don't wanna be here then go back to the dorms," Chu said, walking away from me and straight to the buffet.

Begrudgingly I followed her, keeping the eye contact to a minimum, but I felt stares instantly burning us. I went straight for the buffet, which surprisingly had no line. The few people that stood there serving gave me odd glances as we approached them with trays.

We scanned what was available, then I shot them a cool smile. There was no reason for me to be an asshole. "Hello, may I have red tea and vanilla oats, please?"

Chu sighed heavily. "I'll have what she's having."

One of the men took the tray from me and gave a nervous smile. He dished the oats hurriedly and another woman poured the tea. Could they have known who we were?

"There you go," he handed the tray back. "E-enjoy."

Geez. I felt like a frog-eyed abomination. Chu and I found seats at an empty table, which was weird because the table catered for about thirteen people. At least one other person should've been sitting here.

"You're not going to leave me alone, are you?" She asked flatly. 

I shook my head, taking a spoonful of oats into my mouth. She watched me eat with a grey look on her face, deep in thought.

"Why are you being so nice to me? I've been an arse to you since forever."

"It's not even about that," I said after gulping down. "Don't get me wrong, I still can't stand you. I still hate all the things you've said and done to me. I think you're a massive bitch actually. But this goes beyond that.

"It's grief, Chu. No one deserves to grieve alone."

"You were left to grieve alone," she muttered. "You had no one."

I felt my heart tug as I remembered those moments I could only detail as pure agony. The feeling of everything caving in when you were physically fine. The feeling of wanting to disappear because you would never see someone again.

"I had Shen," I said. His name alone made my eyes feel heavy. "And when I no longer had him...I had others. I was never alone, Chu. After I ran away I met a man and his granddaughter.

"They didn't even know me and they made me feel less alone. They made such a cruel, emptying process more bearable. Without all those people whl helped me...I don't even know where I'd be. That's the thing, Chu. I needed someone, you need someone. Everyone does.

"So let me be there for you."

Chu couldn't even look at me, her eyes on her bowl as tears rolled down her cheeks. She wiped her face harshly, making her face turn redder than it already was. I couldn't believe I was actually bonding with Chu.

"It's crazy how you leeches are allowed to walk among us," a voice said. I looked up from my tray to see a purple-haired Ranger on the opposite side of the table. Her pink lips were pulled into a sneer.

"Excuse me?" I asked with a frown. Chu was still busy collecting herself.

"This is a disgrace," the Ranger hissed. "I hope you get killed after we milk you of your use."

Chu and I stayed quiet and shared a look. This woman couldn't be serious.

The Ranger was joined by three more, all circling around us. A man propped himself onto the table next to me, swiping my teacup and swallowing the last of my tea. I felt my blood boiling, but I swallowed my urge to strangle him.

"Okay," I laughed dryly. "You guys obviously want something. Spit it out."

The purple-haired woman looked at us with disgust. "Tell me, do you think about the people you've killed?"

Chu pretended to think, with no sign of her previous sadness. "No, not really. Unless I hate them or they were fun to slay. That's all it takes to be memorable really."

She was fuming in her seat, but choking it down. I squinted my eyes in suspicion.

"Did we kill someone you know?" I guessed. When her expression hardened, I knew I hit the nail on the head. "Ah, who was it?"

"My collegues. At the Palace," she gritted her teeth, eyes trained on Chu.

"You ripped them full of holes," she said, looking at me, turning to Chu again. "And you fucking slashed them to pieces."

Chu rolled her eyes. "Am I s'posed to feel bad for you? How many of us have your people killed? Get with the program lady. That's like getting mad at animals for eating each other. You kill us, of-fucking-course we'll kill you."

"You don't belong here!" She shrieked, flinging her tray of food at Chu. She smashed her fist into the steel thing, sending rice and stew spilling onto the table and on both of us.

This puddle of horse piss!

I growled, uppercutting the guy next to me and smashing the teacup into a girl's head. I climbed over the table and nabbed Purple Hair's collar, pinning a spoon to her throat. She looked at me with hatred, but didn't stop me from assaulting her.

I breathed heavily, trying to still the rage that sprung to life in me. "Do it," she spat. "Prove everyone here right. Prove that you're all monsters and don't deserve that uniform."

All of a sudden I was reminded of everyone else in the room. People stared at me warily, others had gotten up and had us surrounded.

Furn and Trin came bursting through the doors. Furn looked at me in horror, holding his hands up cautiously.

"Mudan...put the spoon down."

"They bloody started it!" Chu spat with a glare. She was covered in rice.

I stared at Purple Hair again, giving her a cold look before shoving her away. I tossed the spoon aside and slid off the table. Furn ran at us, grabbing us by the arms. Chu shook him off and glared, dusting herself off.

"What are you doing here?" He hissed. "I told you two to tensions are high so you can't leave your room. Now look at the scene you've made."

"They attacked us for no reason, are you deaf, Moonie?" Chu snapped, looking like she was ready to fight again. Furn rolled his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration.

"Let's just get her to Weise Hana." Trin interjected, looking at me awkwardly. "She needs to see you, Mudan. Urgently."

Alone? I looked back at Chu, who shrugged her shoulders like she didn't know what was going on. I turned to Purple Hair and her fellow Rangers, who continued to glare daggers into my back. A tinge of guilt ate at me. She probably acted out the only way she saw fit. But so did we.

"I'm sorry," I called, surprising myself. "I'm sorry for killing your colleague."

The shock was on their faces too, but Purple hair hid her's with a scornful chuckle.

"Someone like you doesn't even know the meaning of that word," she turned away from me. Furn dragged me away before I could get another word out.

We ended up in another building, one so higher up I probably had no authority to be in it. Furn looked out of place too, everyone operating being senior Rangers. We stopped infront of a door and Furn knocked cautiously. I found myself breathing nervously.

"Come inside!" The voice on the other side ordered.

The room was dim, a single light hanging from the ceiling. Every wall was made of black glass. Hana and Bavejo were seated at a table, and an empty seat was open opposite them. I lingered awkwardly, turning to Furn for support. He vanished.

Hana gave me a stern look. "Please have a seat, Mudan."

I did as I was told. My heart was beating so harshly. I felt like I'd done something wrong. "What is this place?" I asked, looking around nervously.

"Interrogation chamber," Bavejo answered. "You're going to answer some crucial questions."

"Did something happen? Why is this so weird?"

"This is a strict procedure, Mudan," Hana said. "You need to give us all the information we need as soon as possible."

"Something did happen. What?"

No answer. Instead the chair I was in pulled me to the seat, yellow Energy rings circling shut around me, gluing my arms to my side. I was trapped.

"What is going on?" I exclaimed. "Why are you doing this?"

"Strict procedure," Hana repeated. "Now give me a list of the Renge Clan's allies and describe their relationship with the Ajisai Clan."

Suddenly that Rangers words lingered in my ears.

"I hope you get killed after we milk you of your use."

***

A/N: Sorry for the disappearance readers, real life has been tough these days