Julian

I never knew I would catch a sickness with the same cause and cure.

Althea.

The woman who tiptoed into my life.

Tiptoed. That's what I would say. She never did anything remotely close to catch my attention. Still, it seemed she was flying all around me like the dove she was.

I gripped the bed's edge to heave a sigh. The dream I saw wouldn't let me sleep again.

To shiver in ice-cold condition for an entire night wasn't something I had ever dreamt before.

The Sun was turning orange with the swiftly approaching evening. The nights were especially cold, even in this desert kingdom.

It had been four days since I was away from my palace.

Stretching my arms to get rid of the nap fatigue, I walked out of my room and down to the courtyard where a man was waiting with a wooden box. My grandmother and Thalia were eagerly looking into it, asking him about the pieces of jewellery without a stop.

I had dropped mother two days ago on the ship to Greece and stopped in my grandmother's house that was situated near the harbour. She wouldn't let me go, not before I'd spend a week with her.

"Greetings, your Honour," The man bowed, slight relief emerging on his face for finally getting rid of the ladies' constant questions.

"Hm, so you found the stone I had asked?" I scratched my jaw, looking into the box to see the intricate pieces of jewellery. He nodded with a huge smile and unlatched a separate section to take out the necklace I had ordered.

"Yes, your Honour. And I've woven them with pearls as you'd asked," he placed it carefully in my hand.

I traced the golden string meshed with one another to give an entwined look. My thumb stroked the sky blue gemstone that held the hanging pearls in the centre of the necklace.

"You found the exact stone I wanted. Excellent job," I smiled, "I'll pay you twice the amount."

His happiness knew no bounds. Still, he just bowed in respect, "It's an honour to hear that you liked it."

"I never knew you were buying jewellery for your wife!" Grandmother shrieked, quickly coming beside to take the necklace in her frail hand, her eyes wide.

I shook my head. That's how she loved to tease my unmarried self, always shoving my imaginary wife in conversations.

After the trader was gone, I settled in the iron swing built at the corner of the courtyard. The Sun was still warm as I closed my eyes, resting my head back to swing lightly.

C- Can my timings be changed from n- night to... sometime in the day?

I exhaled. I had scared her yet again.

The short walls of the courtyard made the sea visible, where low waves rose and fell, drifting ahead in the warm breezes. She would've loved to write about this harbour.

I didn't know what came on me that day. Aristotle was true when he said men dwelling on emotions led to disasters. And I had done that.

Now when I'd spent a day figuring what happened that night, I felt pathetic. Instead of hearing her out like a king, I ended up sounding like a damned heartbroken lover that I wasn't.

Dang it Julian, you really are a mess when you are emotional, I scoffed.

Unfolding my arms, I gripped the handrails. Second mistake was to turn my back on her. That was a coward move, and I wish I could undo it.
I should've given her space and asked softly, like I always did when she was anxious. Maybe at least I should've put an ear on her room's door to make sure she wasn't crying.

She was just supposed to be my court writer. Why am I thinking so much about her?

I released the breath I didn't know I was holding and buried my face in my hands. I told her I have a stone heart that doesn't mind much and what a hypocrite I've turned out to be.

"Look! I told you, Thalia, he's thinking about his wife!" I opened my eyes in my still buried hands and sighed aloud. Where was the problem if I had a wife?

"Have I held him here too long? Maybe he's... missing her," she chuckled. Thalia giggled along.

"Yes, grandma," I raised my head to pass her a knowing smile, "And she would love to meet you, but you'll have to visit my palace for that," I grinned.

Her little eyes narrowed, not dwelling on my lie, "No God no," she shook her head, her playful temperament replaced by mild fear, "I told you, I'll never step into that palace. No no no," she chanted making me laugh.

During the palace's inauguration, in the awe of its beauty, she'd wandered so deep that she'd lost her way, ending up in a secret chamber.

It took half of the day to find her.

"That's not a palace, that's a maze to Hades," she frowned, waving a dismissive hand, "The more you walk in, the darker it gets."

I got up to hug her fragile frame and kissed her forehead like she used to do when I was small.

"Alright, my dear grandma," I smiled down at her, "whenever you wish to."

She gave a thought, "Well... if you celebrate the birth of my great-grandchild in the palace, then..." she flashed a smile, "I'll definitely come!"

That could only make me think of the time, when a certain sheepish blue-eyed woman was holding my niece.

Damn Julian, you really took your thoughts that far.

"No no no," I mimicked her, "I'm still your little Julian, grandma. He hasn't grown big enough to become a father yet."

Dramatically she pushed me away with a pout and held Thalia's arm, "If you don't, then my dear girl would," she jutted out her chin, then turned to talk to her.

"I've asked Hestia about him, dear. He is her grandson, and don't worry he is a wonderful boy," she wiggled her cheek, making her blush, "You and Cicero will make a beautiful couple!"

This nineteen-year-old girl had found love before I could. How fortunate.

Mother always needed Thalia's help in the smallest of things that we bought her along. I couldn't believe that it was my mother who'd asked to bring Althea too, but the events of that night ruined my opportunity to ask her.

Even grandma would've loved to meet a unique woman like her.

The entire evening took on explaining to her why I couldn't stay for a week. Not only were there loads of empire work pending, but I had this strange gut feeling that she was... hurting.

Travelling through the night, I reached Romanos early in the morning. The people had woken up and everything was going like a usual day.

The first thing I did upon entering my room was to check her book. Flipping through the pages, I sucked on my upper lip in confusion. There was no entry written after the day I'd left. Did she not write anything in the four days? That was rather strange.

"Danro," I walked up to my guardsman, going through the pages again, "Did she come to fetch her book?"

"No, my Lord," he bowed.

"For any other purpose then?"

"Not that too, my Lord," he replied.

I pressed a fist to my mouth. Had I upset her so much? As far as I knew, there barely was a day when she wouldn't write. Also, I had informed the guardsmen to let her have her book if she asks for it, but she didn't.

Keeping it back, I walked up to her room. Given her sensitive nature, she must've been thinking too much about this matter, perhaps taking the blame on herself, when she didn't have to. If she couldn't, I would take the initiative to make things better.

I scrunched my brows at the door chain hanging in place. Unlocking it, I opened her room to be welcomed by a damp whiff. The one that stated, this room was closed for some days.

Now it was disturbing. Did she leave already?

A sense of betrayal struck me. I raked a hand through my head. No, she couldn't be a spy to leave like that. Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath to stabilise my head. What was I even thinking? If she was a spy, she would've taken her book along.

Immediately, I ordered the guards to check every spot of the palace that she usually visited, but to no avail.

"Where are the concubines?" I inquired, keeping my anger at bay. These guards were of no good.

"They are visiting the marketplace, my Lord."

"She went with them?" I narrowed my eyes, "Given the last time, I did tell you all not to allow her out without my permission," They hastily shook their heads.

"No, my Lord, sh- she didn't go with them," They uttered, only fuelling my rage.

"Then where is she?!" I demanded, "An important member of the palace is missing and you have no clue!"

"M- My Lord, I- I saw her last with mistress C- Caspara, in the gardens..." One guard stuttered.

Althea with Caspara? That was unusual, "Inform your companions to assemble in the training ground. I want to have a talk, and make sure, no one steps out of the palace," My voice was low, but it was enough for them to stumble out of my sight.

When I turned around, I spotted Caspara at the far end of the corridor. Her face lit up upon noticing me and she quickened her steps.

"Greetings your honour. We never knew you were arriving early," she bowed, "Apologies for not being prepared for your arrival."

"That's not an issue," I waved a hand, "Have you see Alth-"

"My Lord! If we couldn't prepare for your arrival, I have an alternative!" The excited gleam on her face made it clear she was lost in her own thoughts.

Stealthy she wrapped her hands around my arm, "You hadn't liked the previous wine, but this time I've made it like mistress Armonia does. I'm sure you'll love it," she intonated in that sweet voice of hers.

I swallowed a breath to calm myself. I hated to let my anger out on women.

"Caspara dear... I've asked you something."

"My Lord, you're not taking care of your health at all," she pouted, "Please take some rest and we can... talk then," Her fingers moved up and down my arm. Squeezing my hand, she began walking.

I gripped her hand to stop, "Where is Althea?"

"She must be in her room, my Lord-"

There was only so much patience in me before I grabbed her arms to shove her against the wall, "You know my tolerance for lies very well... Caspara," Her eyes widened with the fear flashing in them.

"I'll ask one more time," My gaze burned down on her, "Where is Althea?"

"Sh- She... I saw her with... m- mistress Ionna..."

So that incredible lady was in here, "When?" I implored. If only these women were less dramatic, I would've been in peace.

"Th- The day you... left," The moment she uttered the truth, I left her, appalled.

Four days...

She was missing for four days, and everyone behaved as if it was fucking normal.

"Gather the concubines in the meeting hall," I instructed and left for the mistress' room. Good thing she knew better than to whine about the reason.

Mistress Ionna was one bizarre woman with nothing but praises for me. I wouldn't bother with all the little activities she did with the women, but now it got me thinking. What does she have to do with Althea? She was new here, and barely an attention seeker.

As I entered her room, she leapt out from the throne made especially for her and started her ritualistic singing of my praises. I looked on flatly.

"... and the world would always remember you, my dear boy! Julian Romanows-"

"Thank you so much, mistress Ionna, but may I ask something now?" I gave her a smile.

"Of course please do!" She smiled widely.

"Where is my court writer?" Her jolly expression flipped all over.

She started pacing the room as if in deep thought, "Yes. That was a serious issue I wanted to discuss with you, Julian."

"You are doing very wrong by placing her in a man's job-"

"I've asked where is she, mistress. You should hear my question clearly," I tried hard not to grit my teeth.

Her eyes blazed at me, not expecting the rudeness, "You don't know how a woman's life works Julian, but I do!" she fumed,
"I've sent her to be married to my son, Naël. A woman so old shouldn't be unmarried- Ah!"

Before she could finish, my sword was resting on her neck, my hold firm on the hilt, "Tell me where is she, right this moment," I asked calmly, but my breath had turned harsh.

The nerve of this woman to decide something like that for her.

"J- Julian," she sneered behind her trembling voice, "Th- That's how you treat your... elders?!"

I remembered the woman who had come begging to me, weeping about mistress Ionna to be a sadist.

And now the fierce, almost deranged look on this lady's face made the statement I'd taken lightly, believable. It scared me to the core at what she could've done with Althea.

"Speak up, or your head will be rolling in this room, dear mistress," The sharpened edge of my sword pressed against her neck, just enough to not let her bleed.

I hated what I said. I wasn't raised that way to speak to someone I had high regards for.

But right now, my priority was Althea. And if it would take a gruesome threat to have her speaking, I would.

What she revealed had my body shaking in insanity. Slowly, I retreated the sword to put it back in the sheath.

Four days away from the warmth of the palace, that too when she was...

My hands balled into fists, heart hammering against the chest in both fury and fear, "She will not step out of her room till I return," I ordered the guards and surged out of the palace as mistress Ionna bawled out curses.

The morning wind was chilled as I dashed through the trees to reach the border of the forest, where those huts were located. I couldn't be more furious with myself for assuming those shacks to be a storage for weapons when they were being used for reasons beyond my knowledge and permission.

I ripped open the doors, hands shaking out of control for not being able to find her. When I threw open the fourth one did I find her.

My throat was pricking with cold dryness as I stopped finally. But I couldn't breathe normally anymore. The sight shattered me.

She was huddled at one corner, not even flinching or looking up when I opened the door. Her lifeless eyes stared at nothing, but it was her face that brought tears to my eyes.

It was as if she didn't have the strength left to bring any emotion. Her eyes were dimmed, dried, hopeless. A shawl of coarse material was wrapped around her, but the poor fabric did nothing to protect her from the cold. Her hairs were wet, as if she was made to take a bath with freezing water in this morning.

The slight trembling of her body was the only sign which showed she was alive.

Sucking up a threatening sob, I stepped in cautiously, the dried twigs crunching below my boots. Her eyes moved up to look at me.

My heart clenched to see the emptiness on her face. I had assumed her to cry, complain about mistress Ionna, ask where was I all this time, but she didn't.

One look and she went back to staring at nothing.

I faltered in my steps. Recollecting myself, I walked closer. Just when I crouched to her level, she scrambled away, alarmed.

"Don't come near me," It was a whisper, a threatening hiss almost. And what shocked me that her face hadn't softened at all. As if the four days had made her hard, determined to accept her situation.

"Why?" I asked simply.

"Don't you see I'm impure," Her voice shook, angered with my presence. The way she spoke it adamantly proved that they had ingrained it every day in her head that she was impure.

Stop pushing me back, Althea...

Unfazed by her words, I moved ahead, but I hadn't expected her to scream.

"Why are you coming closer?!" She shrieked, her body still trembling, "Don't you see I'm reeking of blood!"

This time, her emotions came crashing back on her. She pressed the back of her hand to her mouth, refusing to cry. Her gaze piercing into mine, daring me to move any closer.

"What do you think we reek of on the battlefield?" I reasoned out. She was talking as if I never knew what blood is.

"B- But, I'm impure..." she hiccuped and shifted her head, not able to hold my gaze, "I'm impure," she repeated as if it was drilled in her head.

I was raised by a mother, a woman, and I knew the truth of what they had to go through, which most men didn't. Sadly, these men were raised by their equally delusional fathers and discarded the woman who brought them into this world as a plague if she bled.

Althea's situation had opened my eyes to a perceptive I needed to change. At least, in my empire where I had the power.

"I don't get how you're impure, Althea," I started, gaze trained on her face, "A woman bleeds to bring a life, and we men bleed to end a life."

"Tell me, who's impure now? The woman who is shamed for bleeding that's completely out of her control, or the men who are praised for bleeding in a war they could've avoided."

"Tell me, Althea," I asked softly.

A single tear fell from her eyes, "Y- You don't know... how a w- woman's life... works," she took in a ragged breath, her hands tightening around her arms, "Men and women h- have a different world..."

How is it possible? When you are making my world with every passing day...

I clipped off my cloak and in one swift motion, wrapped it around her, bringing her closer.

Below my cloak, her body was frozen stiff. Reluctantly, she struggled in my arms, refusing to look up in my eyes, "Y- You'll become impure... because of me," she whispered, ceasing her movements at last when I didn't remove my arms.

I took her face in my palms to stare into her sky-blue eyes. I had missed seeing them so much in these four days.

Unknowingly, she sunk into my touch, letting the warmth of my palms dissipate into her cold face, eyes staring at my neck, not able to look up.

My thumb moved along her cheeks. Her usually soft skin had parched, dead skin smudged her cheekbones due to the exposure to cold. The lips had lost their colour like her face, leaving it chapped.

What I was going to do now had always been in my head. I used to think that when it would happen, she'd be smiling, laughing with me in a beautiful place with beautiful weather.

But things don't go, never go as expected. Today, I learnt that comfort was not only given on the best days when everything was bright and happy.

It was given on the worst days to make them the best ones.

I lowered my face to her level and stared into her eyes. She eventually looked peaceful in my arms, silently waiting for what I had for her.

And just like that, delicately holding her face, I pressed my lips on hers.

They were cold, rough, but nothing I didn't like. I wanted to soothe her, comfort her. The cloak could shield her from the outer cold, but I wanted to warm her heart that was made to freeze by the cruel people.

She whimpered against me, shaky hands trying to get a hold on my shoulders, but couldn't when her eyes were closed. Smiling inwardly, I held her wandering hands over my heart, without breaking the kiss. Gently, I moved my hand to the back of her neck to bring her closer, deepening our kiss.

Her cold lips warmed under mine as I continued to move my lips against hers, making sure she wasn't getting breathless, just so we could go on longer. Even in this state, I couldn't get enough of her.

She tasted like a piece of heaven in Hades.

Her lips had softened again, and though she could barely keep up, I ensured to angle her face in a way that she had to put in less effort.

Knowing I had started it to comfort her, not to have a full-fledged make-out session, I detached myself, breathing softly against her head.

Her eyes were still closed as she tried regaining her breath. I loved how the colour of her lips was back. A pinkish hue spread across her cheeks.

She fluttered her eyes open, looking dazed at me. I lifted her chin, "Working of nature isn't impure, Althea. Don't call yourself that, hm?" She nodded lightly, the blush deepening on her cheeks.

Smiling, I kissed her forehead but backed away, disturbed. It was burning when I pressed a palm. Taking her feet, I found them to be freezing cold. She had a fever.

I tucked my arms under her legs to lift her. She hesitated, panicking instantly, "I- I can walk..."

"I know," I whispered and took her out of the dingy area. These huts would be demolished in no time.

We entered the palace complex, and I could sense the servants working around, stopping for a moment. But they didn't dare look my way.

"N- Not from the main way... please..." she pleaded when I crossed the concubines garden. Two of my concubines were there, but I didn't bother.

"I am a king, Althea. Why should I hide, hm?" I smiled. I wasn't doing something I should be worried of.

Reaching my room, I pushed open the door that gave way to a lavish bath. For my ease, I had the bath within my room. I wasn't like Alexander who'd bath laughing with his warriors in a grand bath of sorts.

I placed her on the marble steps and pushed her dampened hairs out of her face, "Should I call someone to help you?" I asked softly.

"D- Dimitra," she mumbled. Placing one last kiss on her temple, I walked out, closing the door behind me.

"Danro," I crossed my arms, as the guardsmen bowed, "You knew she wasn't seen in the palace for four days?"

His face paled, grip tightening on his spear in dread, "Y- Yes, my Lord," And before I could question further, he dropped to his knees, his head touching the floor, "Y- You have every right to p- punish me, my Lord. I have done a crime, by... betraying your loyalty," he quivered near my feet.

Danro did nothing unless someone would threaten him in my name, "Who ordered you?"

"M- Mistress Ionna," he stuttered.

She was the mother of one of my enemies. After her son's death, when she was left alone and had nowhere to go, I took her in my palace. She was this sweet woman who would peacefully live her days. I had done everything in my power to make sure she was respected and not threatened in any way.

But now, she had misused the position I had raised her to. I couldn't ignore this anymore like the previous time.

"Call Dimitra to my room and Gaia as well. Make sure, she brings the herb that cures fever and pain." I ordered him and left for the meeting hall.

The concubines stopped bickering amongst themselves as I walked in. They stood on either side of the gold-laden path of the hall as I walked up till the front to stand on the pedestal.

Mistress Ionna was here too, fuming near Caspara.

"My dear ladies," I started, "I would like to know what all has mistress Ionna done with you-"

"Julian!" The mistress roared, her nose flared as she seethed my way.

"I'll come to you too, mistress," I smiled and crossed my arms, "Yes. Starting with you, Phoebe."

She jolted, not expecting her name to come up, "Uh m- me?" She bit on her lip before continuing, "Sh- She poured cold water on me when I... when I asked, where was... Althea."

I nodded. "Zurin."

Mistress Ionna snarled, but she ignored. Her face lightened up with hope to finally speak up, "She ordered some guards to... use me, but... but warrior Stravos," blush filled her cheeks, "he- he was passing by and... saved me."

A smile twitched on my lips, but I controlled it. Now it explained why my senior warrior was always late for the meetings. Zurin and Stravos. They would make a pleasant couple.

"Callie," I continued.

The concubine fidgeted with her mantle, lips trembling to speak anything. She meekly looked at the next concubine, Agnes who had the same expression.

"You don't trust your king, Callie?" I prompted.

"She..." her voice broke, "she forced us to... to,"

"B- boiling soup," Agnes completed, shaking beyond control. My hands curled into a fist, feeling pathetic at such things going right under my rule.

"Danae," I moved onto the next one, calming myself somehow. The issue was sensitive when women were involved. I had a rule that no matter what, a woman was not to be taken captive in the underground cellar. Disciplinary action against them had to be taken with much caution.

"Nothing, my Lord," she chimed, flipping back her braid, "And may I tell that mistress Ionna is a respectable woman. These concubines are putting false accusat-"

"Did I ask for that, dear Danae?" I cut her off, politely. She quietened instantly.

The next three concubines including Caspara shook their heads. My gaze flicked onto the now very mad mistress.

"Mistress Ionna," I acknowledged her, "I treated you at par with my mother, giving you the respect you deserved. I thought you'd be a great woman, someone who would guide the younger ladies," Her sneer melted into a startled look,

"But, I never knew you were forcing them to follow your rules that go against my belief."

"Was it too necessary to push a woman in pain into the cold?"

"You will never understand Julian because you are a man!" she yelled, tears streaking her wrinkled eyes, "Do you know what I had to go through as a young woman?!" She breathed out hoarsely.

"See this?!" She savagely pointed at her arms, neck, on the face where her skin was blotched to a darkened shade, "And this?! As a young woman, I was burnt with hot iron if I even made a mistake!" Tears clouded her eyes, but she refused to let them down. Caspara moved to comfort her, but she snatched her hand away, continuing to glare my way.

This was a reason one should never act on anger, without knowing the view of every side. I looked on with empathy, but she twisted her head aside.

"I sympathise with you mistress, but is it fair to let the woman feel what you went through?" She looked on with a hatred that I'd never seen before.

"When I entered Romanos as a spy, I was made a slave."

The concubines stilled. Mistress Ionna's mouth hung open.

That was something no one was aware of in this palace. Romanos, previously ruled by a vicious ruler, was known as the kingdom of slaves. Only I knew what all I had to go through before killing that bastard of a king.

"And you know well what a slave has to go through," I went on calmly, "Then I should've also made you all my slaves, kept you chained..."

"But have I done that? Because that was something I went through."

No one spoke. Mistress Ionna stared at the ground, her anger dissolving into nothing.

After a moment of silence, she spoke up, "I wish to leave this palace, Julian," she declared.

"As you wish to, mistress," I offered her a smile, and she hastily left the hall.

The concubines breathed a sigh of relief. I remembered another issue that was to be corrected. After much thinking I knew that night Althea wasn't scared of me, she was scared of the opinion people had of her. And I had no doubt the first people were my concubines.

"I would like to know, who has a problem with my court writer attending my room in the night?"

They froze in their spots. The expression of the concubines standing on Caspara's side made it clear I caught them, red-handed. I chose not to point anyone out.

"Even if I choose to do anything with her, should it be your concern? Who your king decides to sleep with?"

They spoke nothing. Uncrossing my arms, I stepped down from the pedestal, "I've asked something, ladies."

"No, my Lord," They mumbled out.

"Are you all still in some doubt?" I asked when I could barely hear them. As a concubine, they knew damn well, from day one, what they ought to do, and what, not.

"No, my Lord," They repeated louder.

"Good. You may leave." The hall emptied. Letting out a sigh, I clapped twice. A meek-looking frail woman stepped out from behind the pillar, and stood in front of me, looking directly into my eyes.

Only my spies looked me in the eye, and she was one of the ablest ones.

"Orders my Lord," she bowed. A huge smile came on her face because I was giving her a task in a long time.

She simply loved assassinating wicked people. Just like Jakov's fiance, Helaine, would be dying to go on assassination missions.

"Don't be so happy, you aren't killing anyone," her face fell, making me laugh.

"I want you to inspect around Romanos," she listened on with utmost concentration, "How many families are abandoning their women during the time of their month."

"What's time of the month?" she blurted out.

"The phase when you magical women can bleed for a week without dying," I replied. She burst into laughter.

"Oh, alright, alright," she said, coming down from her laugh, "I will take the others too, and we will do it in two days, my Lord," she smiled and whisked out of the hall.

Before heading to another meeting with my warriors, I decided to check on Althea.

She was settled on my bed as Dimitra sat beside her, moving her hand calmly through her back.

"I don't know..." I heard her faint voice as I went on to lean against my desk, "The pain usually goes in three days," she mumbled, her hands wrapped around her stomach.

"It does increase when the body is exposed to extreme weather conditions," Gaia explained, "Also the fever has added on to the discomfort," she handed her a glass, "keep yourself warm, especially your abdomen and it would be alright," she smiled.

Egyptian women were excellent doctors, and Gaia was a trustworthy one I had in my palace.

After a while of assuring her she would be alright, they bowed to me and left.

I dragged a chair to sit near my desk. Away from her.

I had never seen her on my bed, and this was the worst timing to feel... to feel whatever I was feeling. Damn.

She held the glass of warm milk, gazing into it. Her lips opened and closed, unsure of what to do.

I still couldn't believe my lips were moving against hers moments ago.

All this time, I was wondering, waiting when she'd slip up, and I would use that stupid excuse of a rule to kiss her. But I was glad I didn't.

"How are you feeling?" I asked. She was so open to read, still, her nature was a complex of layers. Steadily, I got to know that there was a very thin line between her being scared, nervous, shy, and don't-know-what-to-say look. And that's where I'd made the mistake that night.

Like right now, she was a mix of shy and don't-know-what-to-do, but not scared.

"Better..." she murmured.

"Finish it quick or it would get cold," she nodded and started drinking, looking anywhere but me. I took a scroll and acted to read it, just so she doesn't become hyper-aware of my stare.

"When I was small," I started, "I would see mother confining herself in a room for a week," I looked at her as she stopped drinking to look my way, "But never outside in some hut," I shook my head, looking back at the scroll, "When I was older, I was curious, and she told me everything about it."

I had never given much thought in this field, and when I did, I still couldn't get what was impure about bleeding women. It's not like they are killing someone or anything.

I glanced back to find her focussed on what I was saying. The look that said she'd got another treasure to write about.

"Whatever people may think, this hut confining wouldn't happen again. At least in my kingdom," I asserted. She finished the milk and gave me a small smile. But the next moment, her face creased slightly in discomfort, her hands going back to hold her stomach below the blankets.

I rose to walk to my cupboard, "Is it still hurting?" I asked, rummaging through the clothes. I heard a weak yes from her side.

The woollen scarf I had been finding finally peeked from a corner. I pulled it out.

It was woven by my mother and was one of the warmest little cloth I had. She had made a bunch and packed them back in Greece when I was leaving for Egypt. But I could barely use them here because it wasn't as cold as my hometown.

"Here," I handed it to her, "Try wrapping it around where it's hurting," Unsure, she took it from me, feeling the soft warm material.

"I think... the pain would lessen if you'd keep yourself warmer," I finished, standing beside the bed.

She slipped the scarf around her waist, working out the ends, "Uh, where will it... go, I think..."

"Not like that," I offered to help, and she rested her hands on either side. Furrowing my brows, I figured the wool to be stuck in her robes. Carefully, I pulled the free ends out.

"It would go like this..." I sat behind her, fixing the woollen cloth somehow around her stomach, "Yes, done." Tentatively, she brought her hand to touch the wool, but that caused her to graze my hand and she withdrew quickly.

Her hands were still freezing cold.

"Your hands are cold, Mila," I wrapped my hands around her small ones, "Do you want more quilts to warm you?" I asked softly.

"N- No," she replied, "Your hands are... warm."

So my warm hands defeated the quilts. I had never felt more victorious.

Her back fit against my chest as I moulded my hands with her cold ones, intertwining our fingers.

"I- I'm sorry, I had hurt you... that night..." she whispered. Her back stiff against my chest.

"I misunderstood what you had said, Mila. Not your fault there," I whispered back, soothing her hands.

"I thought you were upset... and left," she trailed.

Pushing myself off the headboard, I engulfed her in my arms, shifting sideways to have a glimpse of her face.

Her eyes were focussed on our entwined hands.

"I was visiting my grandma, and she was asking for you."

Her cheeks coloured again, and I had this sudden urge to kiss them, but withdrew.

One kiss a day was enough for her, for the time being.

Soon, she relaxed more and eventually sagged against me. Her fingers loosened from mine, indicating she had fallen asleep.

I kissed her head. The four days must've been so difficult for her. But she kept up.

Knowing well she wouldn't prefer waking up in my bed, I picked her up and walked to her room. Entangling her arms from mine, I lay her on the bed and covered her with a quilt.

Just when I was exiting, she woke up in a jolt, staring at me with her eyes red.

I sighed. That's what happened when one woke up mid-sleep.

I walked back and sat beside her, "Close your eyes, Mila. You'll hurt them if you keep them open." I ran a hand through her head.

"You are... going," she mumbled, eyes closing again as she swayed against me.

Holding her in my arms, I placed my legs on the bed to lie down beside her, "No, I'm not," I whispered. She snuggled closer to me. When at last, I was starting to feel at ease, that everything was alright, my memory travelled back.

The last woman I showed care for wasn't alive today.

Medisa, my first concubine.

You will never have love in your life, Julian... And even if you do, it wouldn't last long, just like I didn't last...

I closed my eyes for the pain to go, but her last words were forever imprinted in my head. The words she said just before jumping off the roof to her death.

She was so broken before she came in my life, but I had cared for her, brought the smile back on her face that was diminished by the years of cruelty she went under barbarian lords. And then my court writer, who broke her again. This time, beyond repair.

If I'd kept an eye on him, if he hadn't abused her, if only...

It always started and ended with an if.

If her words were true, I would never have a wife, never have a family which I could call mine. Even mother wasn't aware of this curse, and it was the reason I was sceptical about marriage.

I never wanted to marry for political alliance or like other warriors who'd marry, then leave their wives alone to fight in the war for years.

I wanted someone who I could love every single day of my life.

Althea stirred in her sleep, twisting in a way that her arms enclosed around my neck. Smiling, I removed the baby hairs to have a clear look of her face. But soon, the smile faded away.

Will she also leave me, just like Medisa did?

She was the first woman in years who had made me feel something that I wasn't dull anymore. Like a Sun's first ray after a long chaotic night.

The sky grumbled, making the atmosphere gloomy as dark clouds shrouded in Sun's first rays that were gleaming the sky. The winter rains had started, which would accompany more colder weather.

The ache in my heart grew, not able to shake off the feeling that Medisa's curse was true.

But then again...

I looked down at Althea, weaving a hand through her head, remembering how she entered my life like a sweet passing breeze.

Lowering my face, I placed a kiss on her now soft warmed cheeks. No. I wouldn't let her go. At any cost.

Because I couldn't deny the little hope I held in my arms.

The hope, that my peaceful heaven would never betray me.

* * *
Ahem *clears throat* things would get a bit more *newadultish* from now.

So, uh... beware?