I make a quick count of the weaponry and then shut the trap door. But not before taking my spare phone from inside it.  Elijah gave me this for dealing with everything that was perfectly right but was not exactly legal. Basically, to deal with the weapon transportation and stuff. I look at my list of contacts and gave a little gasp of air.

It hits me that the first person I saved on this phone's list was Elijah, and I wouldn't be able to call him ever again, wouldn't be able to hear his voice again. I shudder as the force of what has happened grips at  me. I lean against the wall and slide down, holding the phone close to my heart. The tears that I stopped before come in waves now and a small helpless sound escapes my lips.

"No"

I gasp for air again and dry my tears. It won't benefit anyone if I start feeling weak. I shake my head again, but with more force.

"No"

I stand and look in the mirror. The girl who stares back looks strong, but I know what lies underneath.

A cold fire that burns her heart.

A past that holds her back

A brick wall of insecurities and broken promises

A search that compels her to wander

A wish to be healed

Moments that push her forward.

I stare further at those raging blue eyes and whisper to myself a wish that I kept for so long in the deepest corners of my heart.

I turn away, and brace myself. Then I turn on the phone and text Emmet.

1 week. A storeroom. 1 truck. 1 o'clock

He responds in a flash.

Done Boss. I await you eagerly!

I smile at his text. We last met 7 months ago and since then have only corresponded via text.

Then I sit back on my bed and plan.