5: My Life is Counfusing
*Jane's pov*
I woke up to the sound of a little girl screaming. I sat up, taking Missy with me. She looked up at me, then at our little girls bed. She sat up in her bed and was screaming her lungs out. I got out of my bed and went over and hugged Alexis tell she started to cry into my shoulder. I hugged her and patted her dirty blond hair and whipped her light green eyes so that the tears were gone. Missy stayed in bed, but was sitting on the edge waiting for me to tell her I needed help, or just wanted to see her daughter.
"Daddy," she sobbed into my chest. I didn't have a shirt on cause I was just up right too lazy to do it. Plus it was hot in this house.
"What is it sweetie? Have a bad dream?" I asked her. She nodded. "Want to tell Daddy what it was about?"
"A monster tried to eat me."
"Where did the monster come from?" She pointed to the closet, and I stood up and opened the door. I stepped in and looked at her. "See angle, there is nothing in the closet, well besides me and some clothes." Alexis laughed, and I walked back over. "Now get some sleep Charlotte, okay?" My daughter laid down, and I looked over at Missy. She looked upset and walked down the stairs. I followed.
"Missy!" I called has she got out some milk to drink. "What's wrong?"
"You could Alexis Charlotte," she told me taking a sip of the milk.
"I what?"
"You could our daughter the name of your daughter."
"I did?"
"'Now get some sleep Charlotte, okay?' Yes, you did."
"Missy, I didn't mean too... I mean I would never..."
"Save it Patrick," she said looking out the window. I looked at her, and I didn't see what was troubling her.
"Alright, what is it now?" I asked not taking that look on her face.
"What's what?" she asked back.
"The look you have on your face. What is the mater, and it's not just Alexis. What is it?"
"You, Patrick. The problem is you."
"What do you mean me? What the hell have I done?"
"Your wife and daughter is what the hell you have done. You were looking at pictures of them on my birthday, you called our daughter the name of your wife's daughter, and lately you seem to be more distance from me and Alexis than you usually do. I know you still feel guilty for their deaths, but I am starting to feel like you don't love me like her, and don't want me."
"I love you Missy, it's just..."
"Just what?"
"I feel like I am replacing her."
"Dammit Patrick! I'm not trying to replace her, and neither are you. Why would you even say that?"
"It's what I feel I am doing. For more than eight years I have had to go without Angela and Charlotte. I don't know if having a daughter with you was a good idea, cause that is what I did with Angela. A son is something I didn't have, so it feels right, but a daughter? Not at all."
"Patrick, that hurts me. Knowing that you don't feel right with my daughter? That really hurts. I don't want to say this, but Alexis and I are alive. Angela and Charlotte are dead. Maybe you should start acting like it."
"That's it," I said and grabbed the keys that were on the table and walked to the door grabbing a jacket.
"Where are you going?" she asked watching me leave. I opened the car door and looked at her.
"Has far away from here has I can. I need to calm down before I talk to you again." I slammed the door shut and drove off. I didn't know where I was going, only knowing that I was pissed off at Missy.
Alexis and I are alive. Angela and Charlotte are dead. Maybe you should start acting like it. Those words were going around and around in my head. How could she say that? I was her husband for goodness shack! But than again I wasn't really acting like a husband to her. I pulled onto a dirt road and stopped the car. I put my head on the back of the seat and closed my eyes.
Why did my life have to be confusing?
*Missy's pov*
I sat at the window waiting for Patrick to get home. The fight was going every place in my mind, and I didn't want to think about it. Why did I say all those things? Sure I was upset, but I understood what it was like to loss someone, then think you were going to replace them with someone else. It wasn't a good feeling. But still, I was his wife.
I sat thinking how I was ever going to make this up to him. I felt so awful about it, and I made him angry. I didn't blame him if he just took off to Los Vegas and didn't come back for a good two months. Once I thought that I prayed that he didn't do that. Besides, he promise Brayson he would play with him tomorrow. He wouldn't break his promise on the kids, even if he was pissed off at me.
I went upstairs and laid back down in bed. Patrick wasn't there for me to put my head on and hear a steady thump to sleep to. I pulled the covers over me, and I wanted to cry. I blew it. I messed up. He was mad and I was now sad that I made him mad. Great, I did something stupid, and I couldn't take back the words. I wish I could, but they were out in the open and he will never forget them. He never did.
I closed my eyes and hoped I could somehow make this up to him in the morning.
So good to be back! So if you have been wondering where I have been, I have been away from computers, so I couldn't work on the stories I have. I wanted to, but my phones doesn't really let me do the stuff I can do one here, so I had to wait. Just for being gone, I will be updating later on today. Thanks for understanding! I'll tell you more about it later. Another thing, go check out my joint account with @_DatWriterChick, it's called @_PissyMusic, long story. So go look at that, a story for it will be coming. Peace out my Stars!
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