*Patrick's pov*

I somehow fell asleep last night. I didn't think I could, but I did, and the dream I had was awful. It was more of a flashback then a dream.

I felt the pain hit me fast. It was a strong sting, and I felt the bullet push itself into my body. My vision turned black for a few seconds, and I felt my body be dropped to the ground. I opened my eyes just a little and saw Missy taking her over shirt off and press in on my body. She looked so worried and beautiful at the same time. I couldn't be mad at her, not now.

"Missy," I croaked, my voice sounding weak. She placed her finger on my lips and looked down at me. 

"Sh, don't try to talk Patrick," she told me, and I nodded in agreement. It hurt to speck, so I just listened to her voice. "I see you are talking to me, or at least want to. Patrick, I am so sorry about what I said last night. I was mad and angry at you, I just let it all out on you. I didn't mean any of it. I understand that at times that you will think about them. I guess I just have to learn to leave with that, and get used to it." 

"Missy," I said against her wishes. She had to hear this, she just had too. "I... love you."

"I love you, Patrick. Keep fighting, for us, for Brayson and Alexis. Please, Patrick, please."

"Remember me."

"I will, but you will live through this, I promise!" 

I wanted to believe her has the paramedics come and took me away. I didn't want her to leave my side, so I croaked her name yet again. She jumped into the car, and took my hand. I wanted one more thing from her, and that was a kiss.

"Kiss?" I asked, and her lips touched mine. The spark was still there, and the kiss was sweet like always. The problem was that while my mind wanted to stay, my body was losing the fight to stay awake. I fell into darkness.

I sat up in bed thinking about that whole scene. I looked down at Missy who was fast asleep without a care in the world. How did she do it? Live knowing that I was not there, not knowing when I would come back, if I would even remember her. I sighed and got out of bed with a slight pain in my back. After the pain passed, I walked downstairs and sat down near the kitchen counter. I looked out at the stars and let my thoughts take me away.

"Patrick, why are you up?" someone asked me and I looked up to see the half asleep Missy walking towards me. She got out a glass and filled it with water, than took a sip.

"Told you I wouldn't sleep too good," I answered looking back at the stars. "I should really be the one asking why you are up."

"I woke up and got thirsty."

"Alright."

"Couldn't get your sleepy eyes closed, could you?"

"I did for a little bit. Missy?"

"Yeah?"

"How did you do it? I couldn't even start to think what I would do if I was in your shoes. How did you get through it?"

"It was hard at first. I had to get used to waking up by myself, no one to wish me good morning. Uncle Louis and Lisa helped a lot, as did Lisbon, Cho, Rigsby, and VanPelt. Yet I just knew that you would wake up, and when you did, I wouldn't have to fake a smile, hid my tears, pretend that I was fine." She interlocked her hands into mine and sat down on my lap. "I was a mess without you on the inside, but I'm a good actor, and I had to hide it for Alexis and Brayson." He placed her forehead on mine and looked me straight in the eyes. "I don't know what I would have done if you didn't wake up."

She placed her lips lightly on mine. She sat on me kissing me like I was some sort of delicate object that if she kissed hard enough that I would break. The kiss was something I missed very badly, even if I didn't know I was asleep. I pulled away and picked her chin up to look into my eyes.

"Did you mean it?" I asked her, and she looked confused.

"Mean what?" she asked back.

"What you said about Angela and Charlotte?"

"Of course. I'm still going to be bothered by it, but I will learn to let my anger go and live with it."

"No you won't."

"What?"

"I have one more present for you," I pushed her off lightly and lead her up the stairs. I opened up one of the drawers and picked up pictures I had stored in there. I looked at them, but realized that Missy would try to save them if I didn't keep at least one. I took one off the pile and showed them too her. All of them were pictures of my diseased wife and daughter. I lead her to the back yard which had a little part of a beach on it, and in the sand I set the pictures on fire.

"Patrick!" Missy cried stepping forward, but I had a trick up my sleeve. When all the pictures were ashes, I knelled next to the black, warm powder, and moved through it. I then held up the same number of pictures I burned and gave them to Missy. "How?"

"Just look at them," I answered and she looked at every single one of them. A smile come on her face and she hugged me. I made her look at me, and I held her hands up with the photos still in them.

"I didn't know for so long what I would do about the deaths of my wife and daughter," I started to tell her. "I didn't think I could ever make anything out of the ashes that were around. Sure I had Lisbon's team, but what is that compared to the blackness around me? Then a woman shows up on a crime scene, her black hair shining in the light, her green eyes looking for something, but what? Her pale skin was so perfect that I feel in love right there. She walked over and spoke with me, and as time went on I fell more and more in love. Then she was taken. I felt the ashes come back. I didn't want them to, but there was nothing I could do." I took one of the pictures and had the fire brush it slightly. "I felt she was going to be lost for good, but I was able to put the flame out before it took her too." I blew the fire out and placed it back in her hands. "I made this girl my wife, and I shaped a new life out of the ashes I lived with. I carried them for too long, and now it is time to let go."

I leaned down and scooped the ashes of the pictures in my hands. Angela and Charlotte would understand. They would want me to move on, to make this life I want but just couldn't keep up. I was ready to let it go, and in one motion, I threw the ashes, my past life, out to sea. I walked over and held up the pictures I gave to Missy. They were photos of her, Alexis, Brayson, and myself. It was my new family, the one I loved at this moment. It is true I loved my old wife and daughter, I had a new family that I was going to love has much, maybe even more, than I did them. I knew this one wouldn't leave me for Missy wouldn't let me leave, and wouldn't let anyone hurt our children.

She hugged me and kissed me. We went back into the home, and I knew that I had just given her the best gift of all: the knowledge that I was moving on. I was not going to live in the past and let my family, new and old, be at peace. 

Wasn't that sweet and something Patrick would do. Hehe, so one chapter left until RR begins. I don't have much to say, besides two of my friends attacked me for my airheads. I lost them both, sadness. Oh well, I probably wasn't going to eat them anyway. Peace out my Stars!