August 6th, 1996

     "Addi?" A tall boy with dark black hair and a grey jacket asked in slight shock as he opened the door. "What are you doing here? I thought they had you locked up."

     "Got out," she said curtly as she hiked her backpack up higher on her shoulders.

     "How?"

     She shook her head. "Doesn't matter. They'll be after me. Gotta make sure I don't go to the cops. Can I stay?"

     "How long?"

     She frowned hard. "Really Cole?"

     The boy smiled as he grabbed her arm and tugged her inside. "I'm kidding Addi, stay as long as you want. You're twelve years old for fucks sake. Do you need anything?"

     She smiled up at him as she shut the door. It was the first time she'd smiled in months.

     "Holy shit is that Addi?!" A dirty haired boy asked as he sprung off his spot on the couch.

     "Wait Addison? Like thee Addison Karna?"

     "Hey guys." Addison laughed softly as the boy and girl on the couch practically tackled her into a hug.

     "Like hell if we're ever letting you leave." The brown haired girl grinned as she squeezed Addison's arm tightly. "You're with us now."

     "The four of us against the world," the boy said as he let go of his friends.

     "Just like it used to be."

July 19th, 2002

9:32am

   "Feeling better?" Newt asked as he watched Thomas' eyes flutter open. After Thomas' meltdown they decided they'd lock themselves up for a day, take off of training and just relax.

     Thomas nodded as he just pulled himself closer to Newt.

     "Have any dreams? You were stirring around quite a bit."

     Thomas nodded again. "Did I keep you up?"

     "Doesn't matter," Newt said as he tangled his fingers in Thomas' hair. "Wanna tell me about it?"

     "They were about mom."

     "Nightmares?"

     "No. Well not really."

     "You didn't freak out. No power surges."

     Thomas hummed and was quiet for a moment. "I don't feel good."

     "Sick?" Newt moved his hand to brush over his forehead. He didn't feel warm.

     "I don't know."

     Newt frowned slightly. "Tommy you're worryin me a bit."

     Thomas opened his eyes fully, titling his head so he could look up at Newt. "There's nothing to worry about."

     His eyes looked bloodshot, Newt ran his thumb across the smooth skin underneath them. "You didn't sleep for very long now did you?"

     Thomas shook his head.

     "Tommy." Newt frowned as he kissed his forehead. "I'll stay here if you wanna nap."

     "Can we go outside?"

     "Outside?"

     Thomas nodded. "Can we go swimming, like in the lake?"

     "If you're sick we probably shou-"

     "Please."

     Newt sighed. "If we go swimming do you promise you'll eat and nap after?"

     Thomas nodded, a small smile crossing his lips. He already knew he won. Newt could never say no to him.

     "I don't have a bathing suit so I'm swimming in my boxers," Newt said as he sat up on the bed, stretching his arms and grunting as his back cracked.

     "Well now you're gonna give me a boner," Thomas said as he sat up too and leaned his head on Newt's shoulder.

     Newt smiled softly as he pressed a kiss into his head. Yeah, he'd be okay.

11:06am

     "I swear to god Thomas I'm breaking up with you!" Newt screamed as Thomas threw him over his shoulder.

     Thomas just laughed as he walked closer to the lake with Newt beating on his back.

     "If you don't put me down you're gonna be a single motherfucker! Thomas! Are you even listening to me?! I said single!"

     Thomas ignored him as he got to the shore of the lake and stepped in.

     Thomas let Newt's feet touch the ground, their chests coming flush together.

     Newt cringed as his feet hit the water. "That shits cold."

     "We're going all the way in."

     "Like hell we ar-"

     Newt cut off as Thomas shoved him backwards into the water.

     When Newt came back up to the surface he was flailing and looked utterly pissed. "Tommy! What the fuck?!"

     Thomas grinned, the nickname, he was in the clear.

     Thomas got in, letting the cold water cover his body. He reached out for Newt's hips and pulled his body to him. "Hi."

     Newt frowned but threw his arms around Thomas' neck and pressed their foreheads together. "I'm cold asshole."

     "That's just cause you're tiny. Tiny people have a hard time keeping in heat."

     "I'm not tiny."

     Thomas lightly pecked his lips and pulled Newt's hips in so their bodies were tight together.

     Newt hummed when Thomas pulled away. "I feel better."

     Thomas grinned and let go of him. "Good, I'll race you to the other side."

     Newt smiled as he took off in the water, feeling Thomas swimming next to him.

     Newt wasn't even sure if they were allowed to swim in the lake but watching Thomas throw his hands in the air when he got to the other side first while a big grin rested on his face was worth any punishment the professor could have given him.

     "Newt, Newt, Newt," Thomas chanted as he swam in circles around his boyfriend. "I win what do I get?"

     "You get nothing." Newt splashed water at him.

     Thomas dramatically gasped as he practically dive tackled Newt. They both went under, Newt squirming as Thomas pulled them out of the water again.

     "You bully me," Newt said as he fake pouted. "I take you out here and you bully me."

     "It's out of love." Thomas smiled as he bumped their noses together.

     Newt put his arms around Thomas' neck again and hooked his legs around his waist. The water was about up to their chests but it didn't feel cold anymore.

     "This is a good prize." Thomas smiled as he shifted his hands to rest on Newt's butt.

     Newt rolled his eyes but pressed a kiss to his boy's nose. The water was dripping from his hair into his eyes so Newt pushed Thomas' hair back, laughing as he did.

     "I'm so gone for you," Newt said softly as he rested his forehead on Thomas'.

     "Oh my god I'm gonna puke."

     Both boy's heads head turned quickly, an identical groan coming from both of them as they saw Minho crouching on the shore.

     "Way to ruin the moment asshole."

     "You really thought you could come swimming without us?" Minho grinned as he motioned to Kis and El behind him.

     Newt rolled his eyes but didn't get off Thomas, he held him closer, finally starting to feel the chill of the water.

     Minho tugged off his shirt, dropping it on the grass next to them. "You guys better stop this sickening public display of affection though, it's making my stomach hurt."

     Newt smirked at Thomas who returned the look. Then they were making out, full on tongue. Newt was tugging on Thomas' hair and Thomas was rubbing his hands up and down his back.

     Minho was gagging loudly and they felt a splash from behind them which they assumed was Kis or El getting in.

     Newt finally pulled back, laughing as he tried to fix Thomas' sticking up hair.

     Thomas kept peppering kisses on Newt's face.

     "You guys are so fucking happy, it's absolutely nauseating," Minho said as he stripped off his shorts and jumped in the water.

     Thomas smiled as Newt rested his head in the crook of his' neck. "Shut up Minho, you're just jealous that you didn't snag Tommy first."

     "No jealousy here," Minho said as he splashed water at El who was trying to sneak up behind him. "Besides, Thomas only ever had eyes for you."

     Soon after, Kis got in, leaving her shirt on and refusing to get her hair wet.

     "Wanna go over with them?" Thomas asked as Newt lifted his head. His cheeks were flushed red which made Thomas cock his head in confusion.

     "Can we just stay here a minute?"

     "Yeah sure. What's wrong?"

     Newt just flushed harder and shook his head. "I'm really fucking hard."

     Thomas couldn't stop the laughs from coming. "Really? That's all it takes."

     "Shut up," Newt groaned as he covered his face. "You're all wet and sexy and touching me and you do that thing with your mouth that you know drives my crazy and it's not fair...I'm just gonna stare at El's boobs so it'll go down." Newt made a weird sound. "God I hate boobs...they're so like...round and soft looking."

     "Newt?!" Minho snapped from his spot in the water. "Why are the fuck are you looking at El like you wanna projectile vomit?"

     "Because I'm gay!" Newt shouted back.

     Minho just made a weird face and turned away from him, going back to whatever the three were doing before.

     "You know, it's too bad that they're all here," Thomas said as he pressed a kiss under Newt's ear while he slid his hand down Newt's exposed stomach. "I coulda helped you with that raging boner."

     Newt shoved him under the water.

July 20th, 2002

11:15pm

     Newt sat by himself in the library. He was perched on the window sill, looking out at the dark courtyard. Thomas was in the bedroom already, fast asleep on the soft mattress, Newt wore him out.

     Newt couldn't even really explain why he was sitting there. He felt weird inside, like he had to be alone for a bit. He knew Thomas would sleep better without him there anyways. They could sleep apart of course, just neither of them wanted to.

     "Newt?"

     Newt's head snapped around, but he relaxed quickly when he saw it was just Kis. "You scared me."

     "Sorry," she said as she sat down on the window sill next to him. She had on long red plaid pants and a black t-shirt.

     "Everything okay?"

     "When is it ever?" She snorted out a laugh as he pulled her knees up to her chest. "How's Tommy?"

     Newt smiled as he tugged on his hair. "Easily the best thing that ever happened to me."

     Kis nodded. "He's good for you."

     Newt was quiet for a moment before he looked up at her. "You know that I know right?"

     Her head snapped up. "Know about what?"

     He gave her a look. "Are you forgetting that I've known you since we were thirteen?"

     "Well whatever you think you kno-" Kis trailed off and let out a breath, her guard falling completely. "It sucks."

     "I'm not gonna tell anybody."

     "How'd you figure it out?"

     Newt smiled softly. "Because the way you look at her, is the way I used to look at Tommy."

     "Well how do I stop doing that?"

     Newt laughed which just made Kis scowl. "You can't shut out your feelings."

     "I've been doing it my whole life, it's worked out just fine."

     "How long?" Newt asked as he shifted to sit next to her, both their legs now dangling off the window sill.

     She shrugged. "A while I guess. I liked her when we met you."

     "And she has no idea?"

     Kid snorted out a half laugh. "El? The girl is the most oblivious thing."

     "Did Minho know?"

     Kis shook her head. "I thought no one knew...can I ask you something?"

     Newt nodded, watching the girls face turn into an expression of pure vulnerability.

     "Am I weird? I mean, she's my best friend."

     "Remember when I first started liking Tommy?"

     Kid nodded, a small smile spreading across her lips. "And all you talked about was how much you hated him?"

     "Yeah. I hated myself for liking him because I wanted to hate him so bad. He was everything I wanted to be, but now he's just everything I want." Newt ran his hand over his face. "The point is Kis, if you fight it you're just going to end up doing something stupid, like hating her and you guys are too close for that."

     Kis was quiet so Newt hooked his arm around her waist and pulled her into him. He half expected to get punched but she just rested her head on his shoulder.

     "We don't talk like this a lot," Newt pointed out.

     "It's hard for me," she said softly.
     "Talking?"

     "Well talking about stuff like this. Feelings I guess, it's hard. The words get stuck in my throat and I just..." She let out a soft sigh. "Feelings suck."

     Newt hummed in response, letting his eyes skirt over the tall bookshelves. It was a beautiful room, Newt felt so at peace there.

     "You're my best friend too Newt...it's just different with El," Kis whispered as they sat there in the quiet library.

     Newt huffed out a soft laugh. "I don't know where I'd be without you guys. Remember when I first told you two that I liked guys and you and El robbed that corner store to get me a box of condoms?"

     Kis huffed out a laugh. "We didn't know how to handle you coming out...did you even use them?"

     "Do you really wanna know the answer to that?"

     She lifted her head and gave him a knowing look. "Really? You're gonna pretend that you and Thomas don't go at it like rabbits?"

     "Hey we do not!"

     She rolled her eyes and rested her head in her hands again.

     "Okay yes I used them. All of them."

     Kis shook her head and let her eyes close. "Do you think she's happy with Minho?"

     "Yeah, he's good to her."

     "Good," Kis said softly. "Because all I want is for her to be happy."

11:56pm

     Thomas woke up in a weird room. It almost looked like a power plant with the overuse of concrete and steel railings.

     He sat up, rubbing the backs of his legs which were extremely sore for some reason.

     "Newt?" He called out as he stood up and slowly walked into the room. "Newt are you here?"

     Thomas knew he was dreaming, there was no way he could have gotten from the school to here without knowing it.

     He heard laughing behind him which made him turn around quickly and his heart rate pick up speed.

     "Hello? Who's there?"

     The laughing switched out for the padding of footsteps. Whoever it was seemed to be running behind the bland furniture.

     "Uh I'm Thomas," he started as he cautiously walked toward the piece of furniture he pinpointed the noise to be coming from.

     A head peeked out from behind the desk which made Thomas jump.

     "Uh hi. I'm not gonna hurt you."

     The head moved up more so the skin blow his eyes were visible. It was a child. He couldn't have been older than five.

     "What's your name?" Thomas asked softly as he stepped closer.

     "Thomas."

     "Your name is Thomas too?"

     The boy nodded and came out from behind the desk. Thomas' eyes widened when he recognized the boy. It was him.

     "Hey buddy," Thomas said gently as he reached out his hand. "What are doing here little me?"

     The boy shrugged, refusing to come closer.

     "Are you okay?"

     A nod.

     "Can you talk?"

     "Yeah."

     Thomas expression softened. "Where's mommy and daddy?"

     "They left."

     "How come you're here by yourself? Why'd they leave you?"

     Little Thomas shrugged before climbing onto the desk and sitting down.

     "Can I sit with you?"

     The boy nodded again so Thomas sat on the desk next to his younger self. He didn't look hurt, his face was clean and he had on a little red zip up with un ripped jeans. His little sneakers had dinosaurs on them and they were worn but not destroyed. He looked like a normal little kid.

     "Where are we?" Little Thomas asked as he looked up at his older self.

     "I'm not too sure kid."

     "Can I go home with you?" He asked as he grabbed onto Thomas' arm. "I don't like being here by myself."

     Thomas' heart clenched so he just picked the little boy up and held him on his lap. "Can I tell you something?"

     The kid looked up, his eyes wide.

     "It gets better. You're gonna meet this boy who'll love you with his whole heart. He'll always be nice to you and he'll rub your back when you're trying to fall asleep, just like mom used to do. He'll make you feel safe, so you never have to be scared or alone again."

     Little Thomas didn't say anything, he just played with the strings of actual Thomas' hoodie.

     Thomas carefully ran his hand up and down and the kids back, feeling the warm cotton from his sweatshirt under his palm. That's the one thing he could remember, his mom always rocked him and rubbed his back when he had problems falling asleep. It was the nightmares, he didn't want to fall asleep because of the nightmares. That much hadn't changed, but he wasn't going to bring it up to little Thomas. He knew what age he started getting them because that was the year when he parents abandoned him.

     The kid grabbed Thomas' free hand, holding it between his little fingers.

     Thomas wanted to say there forever. He wanted to hold his younger self and tell him he was gonna be okay until he believed it. The boy was squirming in his lap, trying to get comfortable. All he wanted when he was that age was for someone to care about him.

     "When do I get to meet that boy?" Little Thomas piped up.

     Thomas huffed out a soft laugh. "In a couple years kid."

     The kid was quiet for a moment before he looked up at Thomas. "Mommy wants to see you."

     "What?"

     "She misses you, she wanted me to tell you. She wants to know what happened to daddy."

     Thomas felt cold all over. "I-I-"

     The scene started fading and Thomas jolted up in bed. He was sweating but his skin felt cold and clammy.

     "Tommy?" Newt whispered from his spot next to him. "You okay?"

     Thomas nodded, his hands shaking as he laid back down in his boyfriend's arms. "Yeah. Just another nightmare."