I lay here awake,
Trying to avoid sleep,
Fearing that I will have nightmares.

These things scar me,
I 'dream' of people betraying me.
I 'dream' of people calling me old names I wish to forget,
Along with new ones that stick.

I feel like crying,
Yet my face is dry,
Curse how I hardwired my brain.

I sob silently,
With no tears,
I live,
With no happiness.

When I say,
'I was reading fanfic!'
I mean I was tearlessly,
Sobbing myself to sleep.

I wonder if I should even fight it,
I already have scars,
A few more won't make a difference.

I am not that radiant person,
That you know me to be.
I am a freak,
A loser,
A monster.

-FluffeeKittah