Not attending his funeral was my choice. No one forced me to attend. I remember Shahid packing his luggage to come here. At least someone had to be here with Ma. But he just asked me once.

"You sure you don't want to come?"

And I sat there, still numb. He took that as my approval and left to come here. It must have been so hard for both Ma and Shahid to answer the questions of those nosy relatives.

"Why didn't Kanak come for her dad's funeral?"

"Wasn't she thrown out of the house four years ago?"

"What a cold-hearted daughter! I wish I never have someone like her."

"I don't mind listening to their useless banter, Shahid. I know what she did was out of love. She wouldn't see her father get hurt." Ma's voice cracks a little.

Shahid keeps his cup down and gives a side hug to her.

"It was difficult for her. Those two years apart from dad was total hell for her. She would remain strong in the day but cry her eyes out in the night."

"Kanak was always a strong one." Ma chuckles between her sobs.

Was I really, Ma?

"I am glad that you were with her, Shahid." She holds his hands and thanks to him.

"Are Ma, I have loved her all my life. I love her every side. Even this sad and brooding one too." They both chuckle as if it is some kind of an inside joke.

I don't. Because I know it isn't fair of me to bind Shahid along with my inner demons. It wasn't fair of me to keep my Ma here, all alone in this house with Dad's memories.

"Is the wedding date decided yet?" Ma asks Shahid.

My heart sank again.

He struggles a bit before answering, "I want to give her time Ma. It is her choice."

"But your mother?" she was worried that Shahid's parents wouldn't wait for this long. It has already been six years.

"I can handle them. I want Kanak to be sure before she marries me. I still remember her wish of......"

I close the door and they stop talking as if their secret was out.

"Oh Kanak! Would you like some breakfast?" Ma fumbles before speaking.

I just walk upstairs, ignoring her question.

"Did she hear everything?" Ma asks worriedly.

"Nah, I don't think so." Shahid goes back to sipping his tea.

But deep down, he wished I heard. He wished that I heard how much they love me and are ready to support me. The only thing I have to do is hold their hands.

But again, it is my choice.