The night was awfully dark, with no star to be seen. The sky looked like an endless all-consuming void, as if the more I was staring at its emptiness, the more it swallowed everything remaining around me. And I couldn't help myself but watching to that dark ceiling getting bigger and bigger, eventually to the point it would be nothing left.

A strange kind of coldness was taking over my body and I couldn't even feel my hands. I didn't know how and why I ended up here, lying on the ground. I couldn't move nor properly think. It felt like time had stopped. The snow was frozen, almost fixed in the air, unmoving, and when I noticed the snowflakes were standing still above my head and never reaching the now white grass, I understood something was not right.

The silence seemed so heavy and unnatural; it was literally deafening. Even the wind — or the lack of it — felt oddly disturbing. The whole world was on hold, stationary, waiting for something to happen. Something big, probably. There was no sign of life around. The area was as empty as the gloomy sky devouring me. It had fallen on me, for sure. It literally had fallen on me, that was the only explanation I could think of.

I soon realised I was the only living thing here, and I was not even certain not to be dead already. The weight of the loneliness struck in one go; I had often tried to run away from isolation before, I had always made sure to keep myself well supported. But even though I was evolving in this life with difficulty, it slowly increased in me, and finally ate me up, like today's night. I was alone for a pretty long time now: it had been a while since everyone left.

I was lost in my own thoughts, my body becoming so cold it was burning me inside, when I smelled it. A strong, almost oppressive scent, coming out of nowhere. I wanted to get up and search for its source, but I still wasn't able to move, so I simply waited nervously. The smell was familiar, but yet unidentified. Like flowers, plenty. A bouquet, with so many fragrances, the result would be a delicate perfume, something memorable. I didn't understand. Nothing can bloom with such weather.

And nothing can survive in this dead scene.

Suddenly, I saw movements, out of the corner of my eyes. A strange silhouette leaned on me, and despite the bulky darkness, I could see her features perfectly. A face so pure, so bright, she was simply ethereal, and I couldn't stop admiring her, completely fascinated. She was the most beautiful creature I had ever seen. Her skin was so pale but not cadaveric, and instead of looking sick, she seemed like a porcelain doll: I didn't see any imperfection, only her perfect and unnatural beauty. Her sunken eyes were grey, with no pupil, and her lips, plump and terribly tempting, were tinted by a very specific shade of crimson red. The most captivating about her was maybe her hair, nonetheless; a long, silky white mane, shining like the moon. I wondered if she was the satellite herself. She gently smiled at me and sat down next to my body. That was the moment I got where that smell came from. It was hers.

"Are you alright?"

Her voice was pleasant, and the tone she used, comforting. I somehow felt safe with her by my side. I wasn't alone anymore after all.

"Do I look like it?" I answered with a point of sarcasm.

"Fair enough," she smiled, "you look terrible. I honestly thought you were dead already."

We both laughed, and it hurted my cheeks, as if I didn't laugh for years.

"Am I dreaming?

– Only if you want to."

The whole situation was strange. However, the atmosphere was so calming, I might even say, reviving. I didn't feel this good for such a long time. I wanted to stay here forever.

"Who are you?"

I could finally start moving, so I turned my head to watch her. She was also looking at me, with compassion and some sort of curiosity. Her clothes were entirely dark; she was wearing a billowing black robe and a gat hat. She might be coming from another time.

"Nobody. I am not a who, or even a what. I have no name. You can call me as you want.

– How do people call you then?"

She seemed to deeply consider my question, and as she was staring into space, I was observing her face and all the impressions she unconsciously did. The way she bit her lip and how she frowned, concentrated.

"They use so many designations. Your people use something like Jeoseung Saja."

I nodded, unable to remember why that name sounded familiar. I later realised there were many things I couldn't properly remember.

"And you? What's your name?

– Seonghwa.

– Alright Seonghwa. Do you remember how you ended up here?"

I tried to think about what happened, but the only memories I had were old and incomplete. It scared me all of a sudden, but her gaze calmed me immediately.

"I don't know, I... I can't remember.

– Don't worry honey," she whispered with all the kindness in the world. "Just tell me everything you know."

So I told her. I told her about all the struggles of my young years, I told her about my dreams and the success I had, I told her about my brothers who were always there for me, before things changed. Before everything included them faded away.

"Why did they leave?

– I... Can't remember. I think we took different paths that were not compatible anymore. This is how life works sometimes, I guess.

– Do you think they would come back if they knew how lonely you were this whole time?

– Honestly... I don't know.

– I'm sorry."

She truly seemed to be.

"Why?

– Isn't what your people say to a grieving one?

– They're not dead, they're simply gone.

– Still a loss to me," she replied with a shrug. "Did you even mourn them? Ah, Seonghwa, maybe you wouldn't be here right now if you did so!"

I frowned. I couldn't understand what she was talking about, but she certainly was sure of herself.

"I miss them," I yet admitted. "More than everything else. Losing touch may have been my biggest mistake of all time."

I silently looked at the sky once again. I wished I could see the stars, but the night was too deep. She didn't say a word either. Maybe she was waiting for me to speak again. Maybe she was a hallucination. Maybe I was dreaming. An unusual one, definitely.

"Everything here looks... Oddly familiar. It's like I knew the landscape since forever, but I still can't remember where I am and why I am lying there. I see myself enter that building every night and cross that street every morning. I know that place for sure. The only thing I don't know here is you.

– Not surprising. You lived here. I didn't.

– Why are you here then?

– For you honey. You called me.

– I didn't.

– You did. You simply couldn't know you were."

She stood up and invited me to do so. I imitated her with so much difficulty, but I succeeded — I didn't think I could still surprise myself this much after this whole time — and I smiled at her. She looked so timeless; I wasn't even able to guess her age. She seemed to be at least a million years old, but she could be three and it wouldn't surprise me either. It didn't make sense. None of this made sense.

"We should go now.

– Can we stay just a little longer? I feel like... It's my last time down there."

She silently nodded. I noticed I wasn't that cold anymore.

"Do you think I will see my brothers ever again?

– Of course you will!" She said. "You will meet again, someday. In another life."

Her answer sounded satisfying to me, so I remained silent. I closed my eyes, expecting a soft breeze to barely skim the flesh of my face, but nothing came. I reminded myself that everything was unmoving, wind included, and I sighed.

"Where will we go?

– Where do you wanna go?"

Beside my brothers was the first answer that came to my mind. I actually couldn't and I knew that, so I kept that wish for myself and said something else:

"I don't like this dream. Can we move in a new one? Something more... Lively.

– Sure."

I saw her offering me a hand and I considered it for a while. I truly wanted to go, to follow her anywhere and leave this place, leaving this life for good, but deep down I still was somehow attached to this existence and everything I had to leave behind.

"Come on Seonghwa. It's time to go."

So I grabbed her hand with determination, and everything started to live again as it was paradoxically fading away. A warm, welcoming feeling chased away that terrible loneliness packed in my heart. I felt the caress of the wind in my hair and the coldness of the snow on my cheeks, I heard the sound of the city which never sleeps, people speaking with some sort of agitation and the noise of the sirens growing in my ears to cover everything else. And while her scent was still taking over my nostrils, I realised what it smelled like: a delicate mix of chrysanthemums and carnations.

I walked away with her, letting her hand guide me through the night. The snow was cracking under my feet. I never felt this free before; I gave myself a peep and looked behind for a second, before the dark sky gobbled us and everything that remained.

The last thing I remembered was the blood on the ground. A big, reddish stain, like a flower bed composed by some carmine roses which grew up right where I was lying a moment before. But the red roses can't grow out of the white snow.

—

Hi ;;; so this is my "participation" for Ateez writing contest — even if, yk, I won't win anything cause there are +1k participations and I posted late and stuff lmao. It was my first time writing something this long in English and I know some sentences sound awkward but yeah I did my best haha. I hope y'all liked it tho! Thank you for reading. ✨

Sasha.