The next day couldn't come fast enough. After lunch, I spent the rest of the days keeping my distance away from Ian and spending time in my room. Mary-Beth and Blane visited throughout the day to chat and check-in until darkness finally captured the room. I laid in my bed letting the night take me away from today. To lead me to a new day. One that hasn't been ruined by my hands yet.

My eyes snapped open as soon as new daylight crept in through the window. A new surge of energy weaved themselves around my legs. Making my body roll off the bed quickly and rush out of my room. I zoomed past the hallway. My feet nearly stumbling over themselves as I trampled down the stairs.

The living room had pulled itself in a blanket of the early morning light. It was weird seeing it almost empty. Ian wasn't there. That's probably for the best. Don't want him around while I'm at this meeting thing.

Niki was over by the card table putting it away with someone. He was a tall, roundish man with red pepper and salt hair growing from the side of his head. He had a limp as he shuffled the chairs around the circle. His flat, small hands had on a pair of brown gloves that looked worn and cracked. A gold ring tied around by a thin, black rope dangled around his neck as he limped around.

Okay. So, next thing you gotta do is walk up, say hi, and introduce yourself. Pretty easy. Everybody does it. It's second nature. Then that'll keep the ball rolling. You got this. Go!

My legs remained stiff and frozen. Unresponsive.

Alright. Just say hi then. That's also pretty easy. Just do that. No pressure.

Nothing. My vocal cords couldn't flex and contort themselves to form the words. My mouth went tight as my tongue hid underneath my teeth.

Well shit, this is gonna be harder than I thought. Yeah, just stand here. Watching them. Silent. Not looking creepy. Like you usually do, perfectly natural. Nothing wrong with this.

Niki finally looked up at me, the cold white eyes snapping away the painful silence. She flung a smile that clashed with the freezing gaze, waving me over.

I gave a half-hearted wave, giving the order to move. One long second passed. My legs restarted and moved over to her. Cool, I can still move my legs. Thanks for never letting me run or move when it's most important.

"Morning," Niki said.

"Hey," I mumbled, leaning slightly back. The back of my head had my instincts spidering into my ear. No need to run now.

"You're pretty early."

I just shrugged. " I get up pretty early anyway."

First lie to the group that's gonna help you get rid of your powers. Great start.

"Oh," Niki turned around and tapped on the roundish man's shoulder. "Jabel, this is the new girl."

The man looked up and gave a soft smile. His brown eyes had what looked like a wash of gray over the irises. My back wanted to lean further away but I forced my spine to stand straight up.

"Oh, so you're Meril?" He asked, putting out his hand. "I'm Jabel. Pleased to meet you."

I gently took his hand and shook it. Getting my arm back to my side as fast as possible. Alright, you got introductions out of the way. Great. Nothing to worry about now.

"Pleased to meet ya," I nodded.

"So I understand you didn't know about magic?" Jabel asked, putting out one of the folding chairs.

Except that.

"Um....yeah," I forced out, looking around the circle. "I didn't know anything about it until a few days ago."

"Well, you're in a safe place, Meril. Ian makes sure everyone is safe and has the resource to learn to control their magic."

Unless you set the gardens on fire. "Thanks."

Jabel smiled back and resumed setting up the circle with Niki. I let the awkward silence weave it's way around my throat. Constricting any chance for words to slip out. I glanced over at the kitchen door. My stomach gurgling, the smell of fried food wafting into my mouth.

It would be a good idea to eat something before vomiting out the fiery curse. But it would go against one of my rules I've branded myself with. Never return to a place I've burned. No matter what.

I just sat by at the table watching them set up the circle. After a while, some of the residents came down. They waved at us walking into the kitchen. The sound of food cooking and the fridge slit my stomach. It was fully up now. All I could do now was fill it with air and saliva.

"You know you can still eat breakfast in the kitchen."

My legs jolted up, ramming themselves into the table. My legs vibrating in pain as the sharp rush of adrenaline bled into my chest. Ian was sitting at the table, a chair away from me. Eating pancakes as he watched Niki and Jabel set things up. His calm expression glossed over as he watched me wince in pain.

"Hey." I hissed.

"Andy's in there making breakfast if you want some." Ian continued. "He makes really good pancakes."

"Nah. I'm good."

"Okay....Listen, I'm sorry about yesterday."

His face grew a shadow, his eyes going back down to his plate. Letting go of his fork and knife. The white eyes of his grew soft as if they were swirling around in the iris. They were cloudy with light, dark bags pulling below it.

"It's okay," I muttered, rubbing my knee.

"We get a lot of people that's afraid of their magic." Ian sighed, his voice soft. "A lot of people go to M.A before learning about their magic. And we do our best to assure them that their magic is a beautiful thing. How to use and manage it. One of the goals here is to make that adjustment. Make little changes before going to the deep end."

"Yeah well, sometimes you gotta match one extreme with another." I fired back, watching new people come from the front door and migrate over to the circle of chairs. Saying hi to Niki and Jabel.

"I'm not judging you for going to a meeting," Ian replied, looking back at me. " I just want you to know-"

"So stop talking about it." I cut off, getting up from my seat and walking over to the group.

What would someone that runs a care place for magic would know? He doesn't know about the soot that trails off of me wherever I walk. Not what the burns whisper to me every day. Nothing. So why does he think he has a right to suggest what I can do with my curse? He wasn't made to suffer in this. Just me.

Niki glanced over my shoulder and back to me. Pulling up a quick smile before I sat down in an open chair next to her.

"Everything okay?" she asked, leaning in.

Too pissed to be affected by those weird eyes.

"Yeah," I snapped. "I just want this to start."

Niki nodded to me then to Jabel. Jabel gave an okay sign signaling everyone to grab a seat.

"Alright," Jabel clapped, the worn gloves giving a slap in the air. " Welcome to another M.A. meeting everyone. Glad to see alot of familiar faces here."

A couple of people let out some "hi"s as they gave out a murmur waiting for Jabel to continue.

Jabel looked over at me, giving a soft smile as he pointed at me. "As you may notice we have a new face joining us. Meril?"

All eyes were on me now. My skin twitched and squirmed trying to adjust. Finding a position where they won't see any of the burn scars. Well, any of the notable ones at least. I tucked in my neck waving at all the new faces. Smiling, happy, scared up faces. Almost like mine.

"Um, I'm Meril." I waved. "And I'm pretty new to this whole magic thing. Kinda found out I'm a witch about two days ago. So, uh....hey."

"Hi Meril," Everyone greeted.

I nodded back trying to keep what I think was a smile up.

Jabel gave me a thumbs-up as he continued. "Alright, so let's begin with our affirmation before we continue on."

Everyone stood up and grabbed each other's hands in the circle. I just sunk lower in my chair scooting away. Feeling too uncomfortable to join. Niki eyed me, leaving her left-hand open. Now that those white eyes were starting to make me shiver. I gave in, taking her hand and stood up in the circle. Surprisingly against my initial thoughts, her skin felt remotely warm. Huh.

"Magic does not define us." They all said, heads down. " We are not consumed by magic. We are still ourselves without magic."

I clamped down on my tongue preventing any thoughts from slipping out. Just don't say anything stupid. Do what you gotta do and it'll be alright.

Everyone sat back down and I followed suit. Hunkering around the cold metal chairs as all eyes from the group came back to me. I just awkwardly smiled back, hearing my skin scream in agony. They were about ready to tear themselves off and run away from all the staring.

"Did you want to share your story with us, Meril?" Jabel asked, smiling along with everyone.

I shrugged. "Kinda already told you my story. Got nothing left to say."

All the eyes went back to Jabel. Jabel merely shrugged back, smile undented. What does this place do with smiles and their durability?

"Totally fine. Maybe next time you can share alittle more. Katie, wanna go first?"

*                                                    *                                                            *                                            *                       

This meeting...this meeting...oh god. Why did I walk into this? This...this...this is too much. This is way too much.

The girl who talked first, Katie, her story was worse than mine. Apparently, she can do levitation magic and when she was a kid she got angry and she lifted them five feet in the air and dropped them on their head. The kid has been paralyzed the waist down and that's been haunting her since then. She said she was a kid and barely had any control of her magic so she doesn't blame herself now. But can't help but see that kid every time she uses her magic. She hasn't used her magic since April.

The next person who talked, a small guy named Paul was worse. His magic was something like divination, where he could see some parts of the future. He used it to help with betting on horses and casinos to win extra cash. He got a rush from gambling and winning all the time so he kept betting all his family savings to help out with living. Unfortunately, it didn't end well for him. According to him, divination magic is always fifty-fifty. There's a chance that the prediction will happen or not. And it kept going to the latter. All the predictions came out wrong and he lost everything trying to win it back. His wife and kid are now living in a shelter 'cause they couldn't pay for their house anymore. He hasn't used his magic for over a year.

After that, was a large woman, Cameron. She's been using conjuration magic to make copies of mechanical instruments like car parts or medical machines to help ease the load for factories and workers. She just wanted to help and figured her magic was as good as the original. But it wasn't. They weren't strong enough as the original and it resulted in faulty car brakes and machines breaking down for patients who needed it. Forty-three people died from her copies. She hasn't used her magic in two months.

Everyone in the circle had the same kind of story. Their reason is as painful as the rest. Each of them baring their soul, crying as others comforted them. Talking how they felt. How they are working with who they are now. Even having success living without their magic.

Then there's me. Why am I sitting in this circle? I just wanna lose my magic so I don't burn things anymore. That's not a good enough reason to quit. Compared to the people in the circle I'm just wasting space. I shouldn't be in here. I'm not damaged enough to be in here. Not broken to be redeemed. To be saved. I should just rot in limbo. Never getting better. Never getting worse.

My head was down as people continued to share their stories. Jabel cutting in for a break to talk about progress and stuff to do in those situations. The weight of guilt crushing my back. Whatever blood was being pumped through my shoulders was starting to get restricted. The buildup feeling felt like an ocean pushing me down.

I need to go. I need to leave. Just go.

My legs found their muscles and pushed off against the floor. Getting me off the chair and walking away from the circle. Tiny needles forming a lump in the middle of my throat. All the feelings I was familiar with.

The only thing different was a warm hand grabbing my wrist and pulling me away.