(Y/N) POV

I asked one of the Peridots that works for Emma what 'sexy' means. She told me it means 'sexually attractive or enticing'. I asked what 'sexually' means and she gave me a weird look, and asked me if I was 'hitting on her'. I told her I had no plans to strike her, and she burst out laughing. She then put her hand gently on my chest and told me I was funny. It was nice but I couldn't help but feel that she wasn't really taking me seriously. I don't know what she was planning because then an Agate walked by and she jumped back from me as if she was doing something wrong. Weird.

Emma's restless. Though she made a full recovery from the hunt thanks to the repair fluid bath, she is still fatigued from it. I had to help her out of the bath when it was done and she couldn't really move for a day or two afterwards. I had to carry her to all her social obligations as an Emerald. It was a bit embarrassing but Emma didn't care. She says she likes the excuse to be held; and if I'm being honest, I liked holding her.

You'd be surprised at all the things an Emerald has to do herself. Yes, a good leader can and should delegate but there's a lot they have to do themselves. Emma in particular, liked to oversee more important tasks personally, so it was even more work. Speeches, meetings, signings, and counsels; those are particularly annoying since I'm not allowed to know what goes on in them, so I have to stand around with the Pearls. They're nice enough but they don't really include me in their discussions; although some of them ask me to hold them. I don't know what it is about being held by me that's so enticing. I mean I do like hugs but if they want to be held so much they can just hold each other.

Emma gets a lot of jealous looks when I carry her through the halls. I know for a fact if a noble gem had to be carried by their Pearl they'd be a laughing stock. I told Emma about this and she told me not to worry about it; then I told her about how the Pearls would ask me to hold them and she got a little excited and told me I could 'do whatever I wanted with other gems without worrying about her'. I don't know why I would, which admittedly makes me feel like I'm missing something here. 

Back to the obligations, there was one thing in particular Emma needed my help with that she 'refused to back out on'. Emma had an 'honorable duel' with an Azurite from Blue Diamond's court coming up that she did not think she'd be incapacitated for. Good news is the Azurite understands that Emma is in no shape to fight right now; bad news is I have to fight in her place. I hate fighting, but I'd hate even more to disappoint Emma. 

I carried her to the arena they'd set aside for their match, and set her down onto a chair. Emma: "Don't worry, you're gonna do great! Trust me, I know this gem, she barely knows which end of her sword to hold." (Y/N): "The same is true for me though." Emma: "Yeah, but you're amazing. Advantage: you. Now get out there and make me proud!" She grinned at me and I felt a surge of confidence. I walked into the ring, the Azurite standing there with her longsword already drawn. She looked at me and scowled.

Azurite: "So the rumors are true, Emerald does have a male for a servant. How selfish. Keeping you all to herself." What's that supposed to mean? Emma: "Nah, just away from gems like you!" Azurite looked me up and down, like I was a statue. This was getting uncomfortable. Azurite: "I must say, you do look good Amazonite. Why don't you come work for me? I'll show you how a real gem acts." I furrowed my brow at that. (Y/N): "It's (Y/N), actually. And I'm going to decline your polite offer." Azurite gripped her longsword tightly and brandished it at me. Azurite: "HA! You named yourself? Emerald, you are far too lenient with your servants. After I win this, I'll be honored to show you how to keep your lessers in line." This made Emma furious. Emma: "Kick her ass (Y/N)!" 

Azurite charged at me swinging her blade for my neck. I ducked under it and backpedaled. She kept up the pressure with wild, violent swings, as I tried my hardest to dodge them. Emma: "Nice footwork, now take a swing at her!" Easy enough to say; I've never had to fight one-on-one before! I swing a mighty right hook at her but the Azurite simply leans back, avoiding my fist, and goes for a stab. I roll out of the way, as she laughs. Azurite: "Is this all the power of the famous living weapons?! Come on, I'm one gem! You're supposed to be this great colossus, you're supposed to be a building destroyer!" She swung down hard as I jumped back. I was now on the edge of the ring. Azurite: "You're fortunate you look so good. You're utterly useless otherwise." 

I'm reminded of White Diamonds court and I hesitate. I can suddenly feel their staring eyes on me. Azurite sees an opening and lunges at me. Maybe she's right, I can't do this. I can't win! Emma: "Don't listen to her!!" I snap out of my self-loathing in time to dodge a swing that would have bifurcated me. Emma: "She doesn't know you, she doesn't know what you've been through! Her words are empty and hollow compared to the strength you hold within you, you just need to believe in yourself!" Emma, she... she really believes in me. Azurite: "Oh ho ho! Your faith in him is admirable, tell me, do you enjoy putting your faith in lost causes, or are you just that much of an idiot?" Wait, what did she just say? Azurite continued her assault, but I was now more focused on what she was saying, leading to some close calls. Azurite: "You think you're better than the rest of us because you 'respect lower class gems' but now your true colors are revealed. You're just an arrogant-" I narrow my eyes. "-superficial-" I grit my teeth. "-noble gem who wants to feel like they are somehow better than others because they waste their time on backwaters hunting Organics like it's somehow impressive." No one's gonna talk about Emma like that, not any more. 

I increase my size to around 11 feet and grab her sword as she makes a down swing. The blade cuts into my hand but I tighten my grip and I feel the metal give way. Azurite looks shocked. She tries to pull the blade out, but no matter how hard she pulls, my grip is too strong for her to even budge it. I glare at her. (Y/N): "Say whatever you want about me. But you do not talk to Emma that way." Azurite looked confused. Azurite: "Who?" I pointed at Emma with my free hand. She looked surprised. (Y/N): "You do not talk to Emma like that. You will not talk about Emma like that. Are we clear?" Azurite tried to pull her blade back again, and I let go. She stumbled back, regained her balance and got back into a fighting stance... only to notice that the middle of her long sword was crumpled up, with the imprint of my grip ruining the blade.

Emma: "Whoa! Where was this hiding, huh?" I blushed at that and scratched the back of my head. I turned to face her. (Y/N): "Well I-" Emma: "Pay attention to the fight!" I snapped back to looking at Azurite just in time to avoid a stab to the abdomen. Azurite: "I won't lose to the pathetic servant of a pathetic gem!" She just won't shut up! (Y/N): "What did I say about bad mouthing Emma!?" I curl my hand into a fist and slam it into her abdomen, causing her to drop her sword and slide to the other edge of the arena. She was hunched over in pain and shaking. I feel a little guilty now. (Y/N): "Just give up. Please. I don't want to hurt you." 

Azurite glowered at me. Azurite: "That is it! Get her!" At that, some quartz soldiers and even a Malachite assassin(!) ran in from the other side of the arena and made a break for Emma, weapons drawn. Emma tried to get up from her seat and draw her blade but she was still basically paralyzed from the hunt. Emma: "COWARD! Was this your plan the whole time!?" Azurite: "Not so mighty now, huh Emerald?" So... she never planned on fighting fairly... in fact, I bet this duel was just a plot to shatter Emma... rage boils up inside me. Suddenly, my inner voice chimes in.

(Y/N)'s 'inner voice': "It's going to be ok. This is a solvable problem. Just crush them, and then everything will be ok."

I couldn't agree more.

I grow rapidly to 108 feet tall. I have to hunker down on one knee and hunch over to avoid smashing through the ceiling of the arena. I could feel the rational part of my mind grow weak as a brutish simplicity took hold of my thoughts. The gems that were gonna hurt Emma stopped and gaped at my mighty form. I made a fist. (Y/N): "You're weak!!" I swung a powerful right hook at them, launching them all through the arena wall. The shockwave from my swing sent out a wave of air that whipped around the arena. Emma: "Whoa nelly!" Azurite: "Not as planned! Not as planned!" 

I turned to the Azurite and raised my fist up high. Azurite falls over on her ass and tries to crawl away in fear. Azurite: "NO! Please!" She had her chance, then she crossed a very clearly marked line. I bring my fist down to powderize her. Emma: "(Y/N) STOP!" I stop my fist, inches from the shivering Azurite. Emma: "Don't do this. You're better than that." I turn to look at Emma. (Y/N): "She tried to hurt you. Tried to kill you! So I'll kill her first!" Emma gave me a soft, yet stern look. Emma: "Don't shatter her. Not like this. If you poof her, she'll reform. If you crack her, it can be fixed. But you can't un-shatter a gem; and trust me, you wouldn't be able to handle seeing what happens when you try. Pardon the pun but, be the bigger gem and let it go." I start to shake a little; angry at the Azurite for being such a cowardly snake in the grass, angry at myself at almost losing control, and gratitude towards Emma. The arena trembles with me. 

I see the Azurite trying to crawl away. I raise my hand up again. Emma: "(Y/N)!" (Y/N): "But she's running away!" Emma: "Index finger." Ah, I see what she's saying. I extend my index finger and press it down on the retreating Azurite, poofing her into her gem instantly. I return to normal size, my reason returning with me. I run over to Emma and embrace her. (Y/N): "Thank you... for stopping me from doing something I'd regret. But what about the quartz, and that Malachite?" Emma struggles to return the embrace, so I help her wrap her arms around me. Emma: "They're tough, trust me, they'll be fine." I pick her up and carry her out. 

As I make my way back to her room, Emma starts to speak. Emma: "Sometimes I hate this place." Wait, what? (Y/N): "What do you mean?" Emma looks me in the eyes. Emma: "You heard me. I love my Homeworld, but it's not perfect. Despite what the Diamonds may say. Things are rotten here in some ways. Gems are afraid. It's a culture of fear. (Y/N), i truly care for you, but if I were to show that care by fusing with you-" I stop dead in my tracks. "-I'd be ostracized at the very, very least, and probably either you or me would be shattered." She blushed deeply. "If I wanted to have a child with you, I'd have to go through a whole bureaucratic mess just to get approval, which I probably won't get. It's so cold and distant and controlling." I feel a little faint at the idea of... 'reproducing' with Emma. 

Emma: "But!" I turn to look at her, ignoring the heat building up in my body. Emma: "Even though there's only so much I can do about it... I'm not worried." Oh? (Y/N): "Why? I thought if something was wrong, you fixed it?" Emma giggled. Emma: "Yes, but there's only so much I can do. But there is one gem I have faith in. Pink Diamond. She is supposed to be the catalyst for change in the Empire. She is going to do great things once the Crystal Gem rebellion is ended. She is going to champion a new Era of freedom for gems!" As we approached the door to her room, she snuggled into my embrace. "I can't wait to see how this will all turn out." I smiled at her. Emma's boundless optimism gives me hope for the future. My inner voice is right. Things really are going to work out alright.

To be Continued