Olivia's Pov

I failed. As per usual I failed at doing an easy task of just opening my eyes. Why can't I be good at something? Why can't I be normal like any other person? Why am I struggling to live?

No one warned us. No one said that staying alive was hard. Life is beautiful they say. Well I actually can't keep up with everything or anyone. Like what is the reason that Grayson wants me alive it's not like we ever talked after his parents' divorce. Not like he still cares about me.

It is all dark again. I always loved being alone in the dark but tonight isn't the best night. I really did want to do this for dad. I want to be there for him like he always there for me, being a single father to a daughter isn't the easiest thing to do when all you ever loved is lifeless in a tomb.

"So you give up?" my mom said coming out of nowhere. I wish I could cry in her shoulder. I can't. I regret not spending time with her, but I was young then the last thing I would have expected was to lose her or father in that matter.

They were supposed to be there till I finch collage and celebrate my high school graduation. Mom was supposed to cry happy tears and tell me I have grown up and became a beautiful women and she is proud of me.

We were supposed to gossip about boys in the movies. She was supposed to there for my first heart break. Don't get me wrong I love my dad and he is doing amazing but a girl needs her mother, her idol and role modal

"Why can't you be there? Why you out of all people?" I couldn't help the tears. I'm crying my ugly cry, the one where I sob and shake uncontrollably.

  "Well we don't get to choose, and you know that I'm in a better place." She was right the world is too harsh and cruel for someone like my mom to be in. "I saw that you tried to wake up."

"Yeah a huge fail like anything I ever tried to do" I chuckled with tears streaming from my eyes. I must look crazy, I'm glad no one is around.

"Well it didn't work, clearly. The thing is that you should do it for yourself not dad. You should accept and love yourself, see yourself from the eyes of the people who love you. They see something in you that you don't, so learn it and embrace it" She said calmly like it's the easiest thing to do.

I can never love the image that I see kin the mirror. I have always hated what I saw. Flawed this is what I am. I hate it all of it. Its ugly, it makes mistakes it disappoints people. Hurts the people it loves the most. What good is it?

"Sure like I can do that in time. It has been a week already." I scoffed at mom and rolled my eyes, the ones I took over from her.

"The least you can do is try" she said and vanished.

Try?

I am not the best at that.

_____

Not edited.

~H.S