'Til all my sleeves are stained red with all the truth that I said,

Come by it honestly I swear I thought you saw me wink, no

I've been on the brink, so tell me what you want to hear.

32 - Roots

I didn't know how long I was sitting there by the ledge made of strewn rocks, far enough that others wouldn't notice me, but not far enough to ignore the lively repartee between the brothers and the familiars.

Vincent kept glancing at me, but I tried not to meet his gaze every time. If he saw the apprehension through my pretense, I couldn't tell. Secretly, I was glad he hadn't come over to talk. I didn't know what to say to him that wouldn't possibly result to an argument.

"Tired?" It was Alexis, already seating himself beside me. "No--worried?"

"For someone who's constantly distracted, you're pretty perceptive." I said, imbuing my words with feigned liveliness.

Taking in a deep breath, he wrinkled his nose, his eyes wandering the span of the cemetery. "Vladimir and Hector are working on the Grimoire. The spell has to be the right one, or else, all of Vincent's efforts to deceive Adrianna into getting inside that Helcium vat would all go to waste. I must admit; I was skeptical at first, but Vincent did what he promised you."

His eyes were on me now, expectant. It was obvious: he was trying to make me admit how wrong I was to distrust Vincent.

"Who's side are you on?" I complained.

He gave me a tired look. "Yours... And, and now I--I keep having this absurd idea that my own brother will murder me if I sleep in the same room as him."

"Come on, Alex. That's--" impossible; that was what I was supposed to say, but who was I kidding? I tilted my head towards the vat. "Is that really going to be able to hold Adrianna?"

He began fidgeting with the button at the end of his sleeve. "Vincent has created several layers of barriers around the vat for insurance. And Hector had infused her enough SirenSoul to keep an entire state asleep for a century. Once we identify the correct spell for the abyss' barrier, we will send her down a Gate to Halo. It won't be long now."

And what's my role in all that? I moaned inwardly, wanting to slap my face for feeling left out. I was childish, arrogant to think that I was suppose to play a big part in all of this. As if the fate of the world rested on my shoulder. No. The universe didn't revolve around me.

Why couldn't I just be glad that the job was done? What was wrong with me?

"You shouldn't worry," Alex said.

"I'm not worried."

"You shouldn't lie," he said without even looking at me. "Vincent hates it when people lie."

"Vincent hates everything," I ranted. "It's exhausting."

"Sometimes, it's just difficult not to hate him," he said, managing a rueful smile. "Sorry."

"No one's really sorry for hating Vincent," I sighed. "Can I tell you a secret?"

Wordlessly, he turned his restless eyes on me, waiting.

I leaned closer to him so that he could hear me even if I lowered my voice. "Sometimes I wish you were my master."

Nodding, he took his time considering it. There was no hint of surprise on his face when he tilted his head and said in a conniving tone, "Sometimes, I wish you were my familiar, too."

It sounded like he was saying that to patronize me. True enough, it had crossed my mind once or twice: what if Alex was my master? Or Kyoshiro? Vlad, even. Could things have been... how should I put it? Easier? Less complicated?

Then, we looked into each others eyes and said in chorus, "Not really," and we both laughed.

Yes. As hard as it was, I could never see myself being somebody else's familiar.

"Can I tell you a secret?" Alex said when I fell silent. "But you have to promise that you will not hate me."

I pretended to think for a moment. Funny. The thought of hating Alexis had never even occurred to me.

"I'll try my best," I humored him.

Upon seeing my reaction, his face dimmed. "There's a reason I don't take human familiars. Especially, females."

"And what is that?" I asked when he hesitated.

He looked down on his boots. "There are... complications which are unavoidable."

"By complications, you mean?"

With a deep sigh, he propped his elbows on his knees and began wringing his hands. "Females tend to... like me too much."

I copied his position, trying my hardest not to laugh because he looked really distressed with his so-called complications. "Oh, really?"

"Yes," he answered unblinkingly. "And that's where the complication is. You see, I have been born with this... uh... ability--like Vincent's barriers and Vladimir's Binds--but it has a greater effect on females. Sometimes... sometimes people do what I tell them."

"Like... mind-control?" A giggle slipped out of me.

Alex glanced at me and frowned. Shaking his head, he looked away.

"Sorry," I placed a hand on his arm when I realized he was being serious. "I didn't mean to..."

Half of me wanted to laugh. It sounded ridiculous. Half of me automatically made a mental list of reasons why I should believe him. Like how I had seemed to automatically trust him from the start. How I could tell him things I wouldn't even reveal to my own master. Or that time at Luci's lab when he was able to calm me down and make me enter the vat without the littlest resistance. And there was this instance back in the motel when...

I shook my head, blinked. How could it be true, what he was saying? This was Alex. All this while, was he just manipulating me? Us?

"I always wonder if... my friends are my friends because they like me or because I'm unconsciously forcing them to like me," he began rambling, his eyes distant, blank. "And you. You think you like me but you don't. It's only because you're a girl that I have that effect on you."

For a while, I looked at him, unable to say anything. I had no idea he was troubled about this. He had always been the one who fixed things for us, who helped us clean up after our mess, that I forgot he has broken things and messes of his own. And so far, no one was helping him.

I clicked my tongue against the roof of my mouth, my brows scrunching up. "You know, Alex, we've been through a lot. Now, out of everything that happened, I'm starting to think how much of that was you and how much was mind-control."

With his slouch getting lower, he gave me a shrug.

"But you're right," I nudged him lightly. "We're friends because you make us like you. Alex, you're maybe the most honest person on earth. Too honest, actually. And we like you because you're you. Not because you mind-controlled us."

Slowly, his face lit up with a smile. Not the nervous laugh or the wry grin. Just Alex, smiling. "Vincent's right."

"About what?"

"You always know what to say."

I glanced at my master, who was watching us now. "Not always."

Looking at the face of the girl sleeping in the tank, I curled my hands into tight fists. Before I knew it, I was already on my feet.

I took in one shaky breath before saying under my breath, "Alex, can you lend me your Diviner's Charm?"

Without taking my eyes off Adrianna, I reached my hand out to him, palms open. He didn't ask why, but I could sense the question in his eyes as he stared at me. Hesitantly, he handed the earring to me.

I put it on and went right to business.

"Belial," I called mentally.

Just one word and suddenly, inescapably, all heads were turned on me. One word to ruin the moment. There was no other way. It was a general Link after all.

I couldn't think with all those stares. But even as I turned my back on the others, I could still feel their eyes boring into the back of my head.

"Yes, Hun?"

Relief washed over me when she finally responded. I chose my words carefully before letting them out.

"I need to talk to you," I threw a furtive glance at Vincent. His brows pulled down the moment our gazes locked. "About the Offering."

The intensity in the air seemed to lighten a little. But the stubborn crease stayed there, between Vincent's brows.

"That's a pickle... We're here at Vincent's house to use their Door. I'mma help Cairo get Irvine and Sharifa to Halo real quick first. Then I'mma head straight to you; is that okay, Hun?"

"No, I'll go there." I needed to talk to her alone. Because it wasn't just the Offering I wanted to talk about.

"A'right then," she answered, seeming to read me straightaway. "See 'ya in a jiffy, Hun."