And now all this time
Is passing by
But I still can't seem to tell you why
It hurts me every time I see you
Realize how much I need you...

---------------------------------  

While Vincent drove in silence, I kept staring at the window, my mind blank, tired.It was past midnight and we were supposed to meet Alexis and Amyr at this inn. Considering everything that happened, a goodnight's sleep didn't sound so bad.

It wasn't until Vincent had parked the Rubicon in front of a long series of buildings with red roof did he finally break his silence.

"You okay?" Vincent's eyes searched my face.

"Sure..."

I got out of the vehicle and scanned the compound. The inn looked relatively new. Beige walls. Three floors. Trees at the sides. Red roof. Nothing remarkable. Nothing that could protect us should Legion decide to go after us.

Vincent followed me and got in my way.

"What now?" I breathed out.

Shaking his head, he folded an arm over my nape and pulled me into his chest.

Suddenly, I couldn't breathe. I couldn't move. My heart pounded so hard I almost didn't hear it when he whispered, "I don't know the first thing about being a master or a friend, but around me you're allowed to be sad or happy when you want to. What I'm trying to say is... it's okay to cry, A."

I closed my eyes, memorizing the feeling of his warm shoulder against my face, his smell. Then, gently, I pulled away from him.

"It's not like I'm not sad that Carter's dead," I began. "But... everyone has got to die sometime, right?"

Before he could reply, a black Rubicon parked next to us.

Alexis rolled the window down. "My condolences—"

Amyr shoved him aside and overreached from the driver's seat. "You look awful, Noob. Quit cryin', a'right? I'mma cheer you up good."

Vincent let out a deep sigh. He rested his knuckle on my forehead for two seconds before stepping ahead. We followed him to the lobby where a sleepy female attendant waited behind the front desk. 

It didn't take two minutes before Vincent started arguing with the lady.

"I'm sorry, Sir," the lady answered, unable to hide the annoyance in her tone. "That's all the available rooms. May I suggest—"

Alexis warily pushed Vincent aside before the furniture could start flying.

"We will take the two-bed suite," Alexis told the lady. Before Vincent could object, he raised a finger. "For safety purposes."

The lady beamed at Alex.

"Just a second."

She started looking at me funny and giving the guys long once-overs.

My brows knitted involuntarily as I looked at my companions. Let's see: I had three guys with me in the same room for the whole night.

"Oh..." I blurted out.

They all looked at me: the lady hardly keeping a straight face, Amyr sneering, Alexis scratching the back of his head and Vincent glowering at me, his ears red as beetroots.

"We... are siblings," Alexis mentioned in defense.

"Of course you are," she replied, suppressing a malicious smile as her gaze lingered on Amyr.

The familiar just grinned and said, "I'm adopted."

Fighting the urge to bang my head on the table, I grabbed the key from the lady and marched up the stairs.

No one said anything until we reached the room. It wasn't that big. Just two king-sized beds, a sofa, a coffee table, a TV and just enough space for two people to walk to and fro.

Amyr jumped on the bed and yelled, "Dibs on the bed!" but upon receiving looks of disapproval from the masters, said "Dibs on the chair!" instead.

"Get some shut-eye," Vincent ordered, throwing me a pillow. "Use my bed. I don't think I'd fall asleep anyway."

"Thanks, boss!" Amyr started to fluff the other pillow in Vincent's bed.

"Amyr," Vincent called. "I was talking to Aramis."

Amyr patted the sheets longingly. "Meh. Too soft for me anyway."

With that, Vincent and Alexis left for coffee. Said they had to discuss strategic plans and whatnot.

Amyr leaned his head back on the chair, eyes closed, his arms crossed in front of him. I crawled under the sheets and stared at the ceiling for a few minutes. When sleep didn't come, I turned and looked at him.

"Amyr?"

"Hmm?" He opened his eyes and yawned. "We can't, Noob. I'd totally do it with you, but the boss'll kill me."

"Do what?"

"You know—" He rubbed his eyes and frowned. "What're we talking about again?"

Pulling the sheets over my face, I took a deep breath. "I... told Vincent I love him."

"Nice—you said what now?!"

I lowered the sheets to see the disbelief on his face.

"It's that bad, huh?"

He shrugged. "Who knows? There ain't a law preventing master-familiar relations, really. Just that... since a couple of the Grandmaster's women tried to kill him, it's kind of have been like a big no-no."

"It doesn't matter," I answered emptily. "I think I have just been friendzoned."

"Tsk. Sucks ass, but figures. The boss'd somehow convinced himself that he's cursed. Like all the women he'd ever cared about died; Adrianna, the Madame, Rosario. Getting Vincent's evil heart shattered's the last thing we'd want. 

He ain't gunna come out sane, I tell ya. And you think he's psycho now. Imagine what he's gunna do if he becomes the second Alex."

I flinched.

"Don't get too down, 'kay?" he said worriedly.

It felt like my chest was being wrung, but I forced out a chuckle. "I'm fine, Amyr. Besides, with everything that's going on, I don't think getting dumped is the worst thing that could happen now."

We both fell quiet when Alex entered the room.

"Vincent is taking first watch," he said. "Wake me up for my turn."

Wearily, he sat on the bed, removing his boots, then his jacket. As he began unbuttoning his shirt, I couldn't tear my eyes off him.

Loudly, Amyr cleared his throat.

"I'll... s-see if Vincent wants to switch turns," I stuttered, rolling out of bed and stumbling on the tangle of blankets as I slipped into my boots.

I was only able to breathe normally once I got out of the room. I closed the door behind me, stifling a groan. A day hadn't even passed since I was dumped and there I was, unable to keep thinking how hot Alex looked that second.

I suppose I had always had this inexplicable attraction towards him since our first meeting. Without realizing it, I had somehow started trusting him from the get-go. And knowing me? That was saying a lot.

"I thought I told you to get to bed?" Vincent emerged from the stairs, a cup of coffee in his hand.

"I thought maybe you would want some company."

Without a word, he walked right past me to the balcony at the end of the corridor. He leaned an arm on the banister, sighing as he took a sip from his cup.

I followed, wondering if I could stand beside him. I just stared at his back, wishing I could just put my arms around him. Just thinking of it made my throat clench. The conflicting feelings were too much for me.

"Earlier... did you meet Cairo?" he asked pointblank.

"W-what?"

He kept his back turned on me. His grip tightened around the paper cup that he spilled his coffee.

"Please tell me you didn't, A. Just tell me you didn't meet Cairo behind my back..."

"I... can't tell you that."

Nodding, he glanced up at the sky.

"Well? Say something, Vincent! Get angry or whatever."

"I'm sure you have your reasons." It sounded forced, tired. "You two go way back. If someone should understand that, it's me."

"What am I to you, Vincent? What am I? Am I the twin sister of the girl who died in your arms six hundred years ago? Or am I that girl you rescued from drowning? Because nowadays, I can't really tell."

"You're that girl whose hand I shouldn't be holding," he breathed out, his voice gravelly. "But even so, I always... always find myself reaching for that hand."

When he tried to approach me, I stepped back.

"Get to bed, A," he murmured, dropping his gaze.

"Come to bed with me," I muttered icily.

Watching surprise, confusion and hurt take turns on his face brought me a twisted kind of satisfaction.

"Why, Vincent?" I snickered humorlessly."What are you more scared of: that I might kill you or that I might kiss you? Wait—don't even answer that. Are you scared Cairo is going to convince me to go dark side?"

"No," he murmured. "I trust you."

"I hate you."

"You're entitled." His voice was quiet. "I'll wake Amyr up. Then, you can both hate on me behind my back."

Vincent tried to make it sound like a joke, but the smile didn't reach his eyes. Momentarily, he bumped his fist on my forehead.

I wanted to ask him what that meant. That little fist bump on my forehead. For all I knew, it could be nothing.

Wordlessly, he went back into the room.

What little satisfaction I got from making him mad was instantly washed away by guilt.

Once he had disappeared into the door, I jumped over the banister and took the thirty foot-drop to the ground. My knees protested as I pushed myself up.

Gritting my teeth, I limped away from the inn, gradually hastening my pace.

Not five minutes passed before Vincent Linked to me.

Where d'you think you're going?!

His consciousness swelled with panic.

To meet Cairo behind your back.

Then, I slammed my mental walls to shut him out.

I didn't know what came over me. Vincent was trying not to pick a fight for once. But it ticked me off because I was starting to understand him. I had always hated him for being fixated on his past. Turned out, we were very much alike.

Upon reaching the school where Cairo and I met earlier, I slowed down. My steps were heavy. I was hoping he wouldn't be there. He didn't exactly tell me how to contact him. But no matter how I tarried, eventually, I knew I would have to face him.

Leaving me with no room to prepare, Cairo stepped out of the shadows, silver eyes gleaming.

"I reckon you have come to answer my question," said he, his voice low. "Well?"

Staring at my boots, I nodded. "I... didn't want you to get in my way, obviously."

"After nearly seven hundred years, that is all you could come up with?"

My hands shook. I fisted them. I bit my lip, wishing the archaic memories had stayed in Alessandra's cave, hid, until it had decayed to the point of non-recognition. But I remembered everything. I remembered lying over and over to my former master before executing the ultimate act of treachery: murdering his mother.

And for what? So that I could take my sister back from her newfound family?

I was selfish. No. Selfish wouldn't even begin to describe everything I did. I had never hated myself more.

"That's the truth," I said through the lump in my throat. "Why dwell on it now? It's not like Sileas was ever a mother to you. If you weren't immortal, you wouldn't live through her beatings."

Coolly, Cairo shook his head. He allowed his eyes to linger on my face, searching for more, perhaps a confirmation of what he had already concluded.

"Did you not keep it a secret because you're aware that if you refused, Father would have me do it instead?"

I started to shake my head, but froze upon seeing the hint of sadness that crept on his cold eyes as he stared at his hands.

"You knew that in spite of her cruelty to Irvine and I, we wouldn't be able to do it. As a consequence, Father would have us executed for treason. Did you not murder my mother so that you could spare my brother's life and mine? At least, that... is what I had been telling myself for a long time. And now, I only need to hear you say it."

His words felt like stakes being thrust into my chest, each one so painful I could bleed. A tear fell from my left eye against my will. Quickly, I wiped it away and blinked.

"Believe what you want," I replied, struggling to keep my face blank. "I kept my end of the bargain. Now it's your turn. Where's the Grimoire?"

In one blink, the almost human-like emotions on his face disappeared.

"Of course," said he, twisting on his heels. "I shall lead the way."

"How do I know this isn't a trap?"

"You don't. But if it is, you can always kill me. Or try."

"I might just take you up on that."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~