TW: domestic abuse, car accident, PTSD

The Inspiration

Have you ever heard the song "What Hurts the Most" by Rascal Flatts? If you haven't, search it on Youtube and watch the video. If you have, you'll know what I'm talking about when I say it's absolutely heartbreaking. And so is the song itself. 

As many of you know, I had a rough patch in my life where things were looking bleak for me, both mentally and physically. I'm not sure if it was my way of coping or trying to feel like someone understood me, but I listened to a lot of sad country music. "What Hurts the Most" was a song that one was on repeat for a while, as was "All Too Well" by Taylor Swift. Once things started getting better, a lot of the songs I listened to during this time period took on a different meaning. To me, they were signs of my strength and resilience. My ability to fight. 

Unlike what Noel says in the story, trauma does not make you stronger. You make yourself stronger by making a choice. You can choose to fight or you can choose to give up. These songs became symbols; they were my friends when no one else was. They were my way of knowing I wasn't alone in the world. These songs became inspiration for stories based off of my personal experiences, but with a twist. There is always something fundamentally different between the experiences I have compared to the experiences my characters have. This story is one example. 

From my personal experience, pain is different for everyone. But I think there is one fundamental similarity between it: the ability to choose. As I previously stated, we always have the ability to choose. We can't choose what affects us, but we can choose our actions. How we react. "What Hurts the Most" by Rascal Flatts is what essentially inspired "One Moment," but it was also tied together with losing my father. 

I didn't lose him in the way you think. He's still alive, but he has been cut from my life because he is too toxic. Should anyone want to read more about why I no longer have contact with him, please read my story "Stay With Me" or contact me. I don't mind sharing the story. And before anyone comes at me and says "you need both parents in your life," that, to me, is not true. My father was abusive, both physically and emotionally, and I watched the true colours of his character come out. Watching this change broke my heart as a teenager. In a sense, I lost him. Not the same way Kinsley lost her family in the accident, but similar. I lost the loving father I thought he was. 

Of course, time healed those wounds. There is no more ache. No more pain. I can live freely without suffering from the wrath of my father. 

I morphed the way I lost my father into a different sense of loss for Kinsley, tying it closer to the story that Rascal Flatts tells with their song. The idea of a star-crossed lovers romance popped into my head years after things got better in my life. The song had come on the radio when I was riding the bus to Okanagan College. The Okanagan has a great country radio station that always played on the way to OC. I had a notebook in my lap and had just finished sketching the ideas for another story, which would eventually become one I still have yet to release called "Wildflower." 

With the song and heavy traffic and an upcoming trip to visit family in Alberta in my head, I started jotting down ideas. Kinsley was the first character. I pictured a blonde-haired woman with a limp in her leg and scars down her back. Light blue eyes with hues of cyan. A personality that shut the world away despite striving to live again. 

The rest was history. All the pieces and characters fell into place, and then my mind was overrun by the story. I actually don't remember taking any notes in class that day. 😂

My Favourite Character

Cole Robinson. 

He was my favourite character to write. The best friend that never gives up on the people he loves. The passionate character who must learn to put himself first. He's accepting and optimistic and kind and has a heart so pure it makes my own heart melt. 

Although Noel and Kinsley have immense strength, Cole was the physical representation of strength. A lot of readers love him, but I still don't think he gets enough credit in this story. There is nothing worse than watching the people you love suffer and not being able to do anything. It's a horrible, sinking feeling. And no matter how many times you wish you could fix everything, sometimes you can't. He's also being pulled between two people who he knows are connected by fate, but in the same breath is respectful of their stories. 

Cole was also a pinch of the comedic relief. One of my good British friends helped me with terminology and suggested that Cole continuously use the term "love" when Kinsley was around. We were a little pitted against each other here. I thought he should save it for Daisy, but my friend told me it would give Cole and Kinsley's friendship a stronger foundation. And it turns out they were right.

 And after watching Stranger Things, falling in love with Joseph Quinn's character, Eddie Munson, and realizing he's British in real life, all I picture whenever I'm reading (or working on the sequel) is him as Cole.

Does anyone agree? Don't you think Joseph Quinn would be PERFECT for Cole? 

My Favourite Scene

The scene where Kinsley spills her heart out to Cole in the laundry room. 

In this scene, Kinsley is running high on emotions after having a panic attack. Cole comforts her without question. He doesn't pry for information. All he does is hold her. This is one of Kinsley's most vulnerable scenes and one of the most shocking for Cole. They're completely opposite moods for these two character, and I think it moulds together so perfectly. It shows, despite just meeting, the dynamic of their friendship, which I think is beautiful. There is so much raw energy in this scene. Kinsley is suffering from trauma while Cole is realizing that his best friend was also involved in the accident. 

One Moment's Playlist

I have a playlist that is much longer, but these are the main songs I listened to while doing the rewrite:

What Hurts the Most by Rascal Flatts

All Too Well (Taylor's Version) by Taylor Swift

Somebody Gonna Get Hurt by Jessica Mitchell

Ocean by Lady A

Rescue by Hunter Hayes

Only the Strong Survive by Alee

Memory Makin' by High Valley

Let It Be Love by Lady A