Live, from Snoopy the Computer... it's the Random Rants 100th chapter celebration!!!

Here's our first guest speaker! You know her as Silivrennial, but we know her as... erm... well... Silivrennial.......... 

*Steps up onto box* *Cape blows in wind* 

Sil: "Dear Wattpadians, today we are gathered here for a very important purpose. That purpose is to celebrate the 100th chapter of this Randomness book!! *Holds up glass* *Crowd cheers* Our dear author, ThymeMachine, is here to celebrate this milestone with us. Applause!! *Claps* *Crowd claps with* Now, to celebrate!! 

*Music starts playing* *Fireworks start going off* *Plane flies by overhead* *Thranduil descends riding his elk with a parachute* *Smaug appears over mountains wearing a party hat and blowing a party blower* *Sam, Dean, and Cas appear to join the party*

*Chaos ensues*

Sil: Oh, and one more thing- *Gives ThymeMachine balloon* Congratulations, friend.

                contributed by    Silivrennial

*upbeat musical intro as next speaker walks onstage*

BJKaplan: Hey, ThymeMachine! Congratulations on 100 chapters! That's awesome!

Thranduil: *fabulously catwalks into the room* DID SOMEBODY SAY AWESOME???

BJ: *facepalms*

Thranduil: *throws glitter everywhere* NOW IT'S AWESOME AND FABULOUS *leaves*

BJ: ...I swear I didn't actually invite him.

              contributed by       BJKaplan

*suddenly*

Merry and Pippin: *burst through the door*

Pippin: WE'RE HERE, PEEPS!

Everyone: *groans*

Merry: *facepalm*

Pippin: YO, YO! WHAT'S UP, MY HOMIES?!

Merry: Pippin, you're not a gangster.

Pippin: Pssh, who says so?

Merry: The Universe.

Pippin: Bruh, I'm too cool for the Universe. I make my own rules.

Gandalf: I know how you feel, man. No one can tell us what to do. *puts on some shades and a cap on backwards* Peace out.

Everyone: *facepalm*

Merry: You can't be serious.

Gandalf: I'm totally serious. In fact, I'm so serious that I'm actually a gangSTAR.

Pippin: What's that?

Gandalf: It's where I look like your average gangster, but I'm actually a big ball of hot gas floating in space too. *flops down onto the ground with his limbs spread out like a star* Sparkle, sparkle dudes.

Pippin: AWESOOOOOME!

Merry: You've guys have got issues.

Pippin: Any-hoooo, congrats on 100 chapters! Here's to another million more!

Bilbo: *walks in, all flustered* WHERE ARE THOSE TWO IMBECILES?!

Pippin: *squeaks* RUN!

Merry and Pippin: *hide behind GangSTAR Gandalf*

GangSTAR Gandalf: YOU SHALL NOT PASS THE RULER OF THE GANGSTARS! WE TOO COOL FOR YOU, DAWG!

Bilbo: *pushes him aside*

GangSTAR Gandalf: *flops to the floor in his star position* GangSTAR down!

Bilbo: You seriously need help.

Merry: Yeah, we have no idea what's wrong with him.

Bilbo: Meriadoc and Peregrin! Did you or did you not Photoshop a photo of me and Gandalf standing at a wedding alter and post it on Instagram with the hashtag "#Bandalf4Life"?!

Pippin: ...maybe...

Merry: No, we didn't!

Pippin: ...maybe...

Merry: *whispering* Pip, shut up.

Pippin: ...maaaaaaybe...

Bilbo: *sigh* I don't know how anyone puts up with you.

GangSTAR Gandalf: *still on the floor* Me neither, bruh.

Bilbo: Come on, let's take you to a mental hospital. *walks away with Gandalf*

Pippin: AND LET'S CELEBRATE THE 100TH CHAPTER!!!

Everyone: *parties*

Thranduil: *bursts through the door* Did someone say "party"?! *throws off his crown and puts his party hat on* THE PARTY DON'T START 'TIL THE KING ARRIVES!!!

Pippin: *throws him some gangster shades*

Thranduil: *puts them on* Woah ... I feel so much cooler.

Pippin: Oh yeaaaaaahhhhh!

Legolas: Dad, you're so embarassing...

Thranduil: Hush, hush, my little Leggy-poo. *pinches his cheeks*

Legolas: *sigh*

Merry: I know how you feel. I've got the same problem. *points to Pippin who is riding on Thranduil's elk like a maniac*

Legolas: Yeah, no one understands how crazy this is.

Merry: Yeah.

Smaug: QUIT YOUR COMPLAINING AND PARTAAAAAAYYYYYY! *sits on everyone*

                 contributed by    TarwaRedwood

*no signal screen*

*cut to backstage dressing room*

John Watson: *into earpiece* Yeah, he just sat on literally everyone. ... yep..... wait, do you really think we need the Dwarf SWAT Team to -

*huge explosion from far away shakes the camera*

John: *fumbles with cue cards* Oh, um hi everyone! So... um, yeah, stagehands are busy cleaning up the main stage from the, uh, festivities *pauses as Smaug roars and people scream* So we've brought our next guests back here, for a little special surprise!

*cut to a glitchy green screen image of a magical forest*

Smeagol: Welcome, Precious! Welcome to our part of the program!

Gollum: Where you all must DIE, YOU STUPID FAT -

Smeagol: *smacks himself and smiles crazily* Where we have a special guest, Precious, yes!!

*spotlight shifts to  DessBasilisk  and her new husband  Thorin Oakenshield*

Dess: *waves awkwardly as Smeagol punches himself in the head*

Gollum: YES PWECIOUS THEY WILL BE THROWN INTO THE VOLCANO - *punches himself*

Smeagol: *holding back one of his arms with the other* Tonight we have the lovely new spouses, Thorin and - *falls over backwards*

Gollum: THEY MUST BE SACRIFICED PRECIOUS, YESSSSSS

Smeagol: *smacking himself with every word* GO AWAY PRECIOUS GO AWAY!!!!!!!!!! *suddenly sits up and smiles at the camera like nothing happened* Tonight we have the lovely new spouses, Precious: Dess and Thorin Oakenshield. They just got married, Precious, in a precious venue and Dess was wearing the most precious dress, Precious, here are some photo's Precious... *gestures to glitching green screen, where a wedding photo should be displayed... but it's all jacked up and Dess' head is on Thorin's body and Thorin's head is on top of the cake... and an Orc security guard's face is on Dess' stomach...* Yes, right, so moving on, Precious... 

IN honor of the newly weds and this 100th chapter, Precious, we've decided to send the forever intertwined couple, Precious...... on a LOTHLORIEN HONEYMOON PRECIOUS YESSS!!!!!!!!! Congratulations, Precious!!!! Oh look at them kissing now... oh that's very nice, Precious, a precious moment, truly, Precious.... *pulls out a Kodak and snaps a photo* Aren't they just -

Audience: WE GET IT! THEY'RE PRECIOUS!

Smeagol: Actually, I was going to say they look very dapper tonight, but that's fine Precious, that's completely okay.... *waddles off-camera* 

*lights dim on the happy couple*

*cut to Bilbo, mounting his horse in front of the mental hospital, having just dropped off Gandalf the GangSTAR*

Bilbo: Well everyone, that's all we have for you tonight. Thank you very much to all who've contributed and all who've joined us for this very special occasion. Congratulations, ThymeMachine! Here's to another 100! HUZZAH! *slaps horse - it rears back and Bilbo slips off. The horse kicks back and gallops away, while Bilbo flies through the air* OH MY VALAR SOMEONE DO SOMETH--!!

_________________

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OH MAH GOODNESS GUYS IT'S FINALLY HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!! That 100th chapter everyone's been waiting a month for..... yeah I am reeeeeeeally sorry about that... I hve so many rants to give you guys from school starting but I couldn't because I wasn't going to do anything until THIS CELEBRATION WAS FINISHED DARN IT. So yeah, HOPEFULLY this'll be back on track really soon, because this is not to be endured any longer. 

I HAVE MADE THE PEOPLE SUFFER LONG ENOUGH

oh and fanks for da celebration... it was sooooo grate

P.S. u might notice that I have changed my username YET AGAIN. I just really stopped liking "The Word Shaker" so I came up with something real clever-like! Let's say its in honor of the 100 chapters (I really want to have a username that STAYS as MY username, so hopefully I won't end up hating this one). :)