'Partners in Scheme' Book by 

Cover: I love the illustration of the leads in the book as the background. Taking into consideration the font, I'd suggest changing it. It makes the cover look clunky and uncoordinated. It's a pretty cover overall. 3 points.

Titles: It is short and sweet, giving a hint as to what to expect from the book. 10 points.

Summary/blurb: Normally, Blurbs should give away a certain amount of the story to the readers. This will captivate their attention and make them want to read the book. Honestly, your blurb made the book look really cliché. I could predict the ending of the book without having to read it. Marisol agrees to Sawyer's deal to take down Devon because she wants revenge for her emotions (Was I spot on?). Sweetie, a blurb should hint at what should happen but not make it glaringly obvious. 5 points.

Plot: First off, I couldn't get past chapter two. I know there's no given standard on how to write a book except proper grammar and a decent story structure. What turned me off was the lack of descriptions in the book. The story starts with the demotion of Marisol and we see her crying not only because she is getting demoted, but because of how savage her boss is toward her. I'm not very familiar with how the corporate world works, but descriptions are necessary. Like how she takes one last look at her office or what the head of the sales department office looks like. You showed most of the emotions or made it look bland that I couldn't feel for your characters. The paragraph arrangement was the final straw for me and made me not want to continue reading. 10 points.

Character development: Marisol seems like a woman who tries, but can't be brave. Sawyer has a low-key dipolar disorder because of his mood swings whenever Marisol refers to him with the proper title. Since I didn't go far in your story, I'm not sure if they change during their journey, but it would be nice if they did. 15 Points.

Style of writing: You chose the first person and informal. You did well on the informal part, but I wouldn't say the same for the first-person part. The balance of her thoughts with the dialogue isn't properly done. It's normal for there to be constantly switching between the two, but it has to flow. 5 points.

Grammar: I didn't spot any misspelt words, but I saw a few missing punctuations, wordy sentences and unfocused paragraphs. I suggest using Grammarly, ProWritingAid or a human editor to rectify these problems. 5 points.

Total: 53 points

Now here's my advice.

First up, I suggest you pick up a couple of books and read them. Your lack of reading is very obvious from the story structure to the outlining.

I know most people don't agree with this piece of advice and it is subjective, but you need to read other pieces of literature if you want to be a talented writer. You'll be able to see in the flesh how the flow of paragraphs is done, the plot line and my personal favourite it's a free way of learning your craft without actually paying anything but your time.

It's extremely essential and I can't stress it enough.

Also, you need to map out your book. I'm not only talking about how to get your characters to achieve their goal; I'm talking about character arcs, sub-plots, and environmental problems.

Your story is more of a character-driven one. The characters are the ones driving the story forward. Why not have the plot have a drastic effect on them as well? Let's say Marisol's mucked-up report was a key to avoiding bankruptcy for the company. I agree she is just a human, but these things happen. Her boss gets a new P. A to handle the report because they need it ASAP. Marisol steals the new report and uses it to blackmail the PA because now that her salary is short, her landlord wants her gone.

The character-driven part is Marisol stealing the report to extort money, while the plot-driven part is her being forced to leave her apartment. You get? This also adds depth to the story along with a sub-plot line.

Finally, you need to show not tell. Most people confuse the two and, although they are vital for novels, depending on what you are trying to portray and your target audience, it needs a delicate balance. Instead of telling us how crushed she was when she lost her job, you could tell us about how her heartbeat spiked up, the mental maths she did considering the deducement of her pay and of course the immense shame that envelopes Marisol as she arrives at the sales department.

Girlie, you're ballsy to write and publish it for the world to see. I hope you finish your book and improve your writing skills along the way. Remember, it's the journey and joy you feel that should really matter to you.

Have a nice day.