'Finding Him In My Multiverse' Book by sanstill

Cover: It's a very pretty cover and it looks unique. It also gives us an insight on what to expect. 5 points.

Title: It's a long title and just looking at it, I thought it was a fantasy genre. I suggest you shorten it or change it entirely. The title of a book matters alot if not more than the cover. 7 points.

Summary/blurb: Again, it's giving me fantasy vibes. The summary doesn't cover much and in the book, Seth is said to be eighteen but in the summary he's nineteen. 6 points.

Plot: Now here's the real problem. It took me to read about twelve chapters before I could understand what is going on. In this book, we are dealing with the love triangle trope. It's a classic and you really showed a high quality of suspense; I mean I never would have thought that one of the guys that she was choosing over would be gay. Also you showed as much as you told, which is good. 26 points.

Character development: Left for me, I think most of the characters share an oblivious trait. Look at how Cam and Aly react, you would think Cam had a crush on her. Then Brooke and Evan crack me up at times, then what's the deal with her mother? 19 points.

Style of writting: Most people include comic relief in their book but in yours it doesn't look needed. I love the way you wrote it but we need more insight on the person's inner thoughts. 9 points.

Grammar: There were alot of punctuation mistakes, I corrected them and left a little note that I think would help. 5 points.

Total: 77 points.

Here's the deal here sweetie.

Your book is cool but it gives me mixed vibes like the summary and title. If you really want to nail it in this genre; you are writting, try reading books written in this same genre. That way it could give you some tips on what to do and what not to do.

You did a good job in that trope you worked with, I suggest developing the personality of the characters to spice up the book. Not all of them should be shy, naive or plain. Someone could be the smart one or the foodie. Give them a personality to stick with it and also make them realize their faults. That way they can grow like you and I.

Then the plot could use some work, it looks scattered in a way. I feel it's missing something but I can't put my finger on it. 🤷‍♀️ Then try and keep record of certain details like eye colour, hair colour and age. That way you won't confuse the readers.

Anyway try working on the grammar and I'm sure you will get more readers. 2k is a success and I know you will get more.

Before I forget, you also need to describe their emotions and surrounding a bit more. It helps readers get a feel of the settings.

Have a nice day♤.