Alex fumed the entire carriage ride home. He still couldn't believe the turn of events that had just played out. How had one moment he was waiting with anticipation at seeing Miranda, of actually feeling excited about her becoming his wife. And the next she was turning him away, his desire to provide for her becoming meaningless.

And then of course there was her father. What man would willingly compromise the future of his own family? Alex could not make heads or tails of it. But there was one thing that he couldn't deny and that was the peace that emanated off of Mr. Edwards. He was completely content with Miranda's decision, and may have even suggested it. And that was something that Alex could not say he had.

Arriving back at his townhouse, Alex flung open the carriage door and strode angrily inside. Throwing his things at the footman, Alex hurried into his study, whipping the door closed behind him. He was hiding to lick his wounds and he didn't care. The last thing Alex wanted was his mother probing him with more questions. When he arrived home yesterday, she immediately knew something had gone amiss but he refused to give any explanations.

Dragging his feet towards his desk, Alex realized how incredibly tired he suddenly felt. With all that had happened in the past few days, it was beginning to take its toll.

Alex wasn't sure what he was supposed to do now. It crossed his mind to go back to Roseglen to resume his life as a recluse. But the idea seemed much more hollow now. The thought of returning without Miranda left a searing pain in his chest.

Glancing down at the various papers all neatly organized, Alex spied a piece of paper that looked like a list of some sort. Frustration swelled up inside him again that he couldn't even deduce a simple list. Miranda had been right to reject him. If she had truly known the man he was, she wouldn't have professed her love so willingly.

Letting out a cry of anger, Alex cleared all of the papers off his desk in one big sweep. How could she say that she loved him and yet refuse to marry him? It was enough to drive a man mad. Do you love me? Miranda's words reverberated through him. He knew that he could love her, but it was like a great big chain was tied around his neck, prohibiting him from taking the leap.

"What is going on in here?"

Alex held back a groan as his mother barged into the room without even bothering to knock first. As her gaze raked over the strewn documents, Alex maintained his haughty composure, though inwardly he felt he should be hanging his head in shame at being caught in a childish outburst. When her eyes finally met his, he found no condemnation in them, only sympathy.

"What is going on Alexander?" his mother asked softly. "Ever since you came home yesterday you haven't been yourself."

Alex squeezed his hands into his fists at his side. He never felt such a lack of control over his emotions. "I went to see Miranda this morning. I offered to marry her but she refused."

Not letting any emotion show on her face, his mother went over to a nearby chair and sat down. "Do you know why she refused you?"

"She didn't want to marry out of obligation." Alex snorted. "Apparently salvaging her reputation wasn't enough for her."

His mother raised an eyebrow at the admission. "Is that why you came back early from the house party?"

Alex nodded. "Miranda and I had acted quite...close at the party. Mrs. Benson believed we were having a liaison at the house."

"You said Miranda didn't want to marry out of obligation. Was she willing to marry for love?"

Heaving a sigh, Alex sat down in the adjacent chair. He might as well tell all of it now. "Yes, she told me she loved me."

Whack! "Ow!" Alex exclaimed, rubbing the back of his head where his mother just hit it. "What was that for?"

"For being ridiculous. You have the opportunity to marry for love and you throw it away."

"Maybe I don't love her," Alex shot back.

His mother swept her hand over the room. "The state of your office seems to indicate quite the opposite."

Alex glared at his mother but couldn't think of a way to disprove her statement.

"Alexander, believe it or not, someone can love you for exactly who you are, no matter your afflictions."

Unable to bear it any longer, Alex jumped out of his chair and stomped over to the far side of the room. "You talk so much about love Mother, and yet look at what a marriage based on love did to you. For two years you barely acknowledged Evelyn and I's existence." Alex shook his head. "No, I will not put myself into the same situation. I almost lost you, I will not lose Miranda too."

His mother came over to him, concern etched on her face. "Is that what this is about? Darling, I know I let grief overcome me for a time and I'm sorry for putting you and your sister through that." She cupped his face into her hands as tears began to form in her eyes. "But you can't let fear stop you from living your life."

"I don't know if I'm strong enough," Alex said. He had forever lived in fear of someone finding out his secret and when his father died, he feared losing someone else he held dear.

"It will take bravery," his mother said with a smile. "But you are your father's son. You overcame your illiteracy and became an Earl your father would be proud of. I know you can overcome this too."

Alex leaned in and wrapped his arms around his mother. He could feel her words begin to heal the crevices in his heart. But will it be enough for him to step out in faith?

+++

The next few days for Miranda went by eerily quiet. News of her fall from grace had now spread throughout the town and so any calls or invitations had come to a screeching halt. Her parents bore it well though Miranda could sometimes detect a slight sadness to their eyes when reading a letter uninviting them to a social event.

Miranda also felt a despondency at being ostracized from society. Moreso from knowing she would never be able to see Cissy again. But there was also a feeling of peace that she had never experienced before. She had chosen the hard path and yet she knew it was the right one. For whatever came next, she knew that God would be with them.

Heading out on her usual tutoring day, Miranda actually smiled up at the sunny day. Ignoring the surly looks and whisperings from passersby, Miranda walked with a lightness that she hadn't felt in ages. Her heart still ached for Alex but she held no regrets. A part of her did wonder if she should have told him that she knew he couldn't read. And yet she knew that it was something that he needed to do on his own. If they ever crossed paths again, she hoped he would be ready to share with her.

Miranda was looking forward to her time with Henry. Now that she had figured out what plagued him, she planned on introducing some different teaching techniques. The medical journal did not outline methods in which to reduce the word blindness and so Miranda was taking it upon herself to conduct a little research of her own.

Approaching the school house, Miranda began to feel slightly nervous. For since she turned down Alex's offer, Mother and Father were still going to need to be provided for. Miranda didn't know how long they would be able to stay in the London townhouse and so she planned on inquiring about the open teaching position and submitting an application.

It did make Miranda wonder if this was God's plan for her all along. She loved teaching and now that she had become aware that word blindness existed, she could help more children like Henry who suffered from it.

Heading through the front doors, Miranda made her way to the usual room. She would conduct her study session with Henry first and then approach Miss Sutherland about the position. But when she entered the room she was startled to find that the desk and chairs were missing. Perplexed, Miranda wondered where they would have moved them and why.

Deciding she needed to seek out Miss Sutherland immediately, Miranda went to one of the classrooms in search of her. She found her preparing the day's lesson on the chalkboard, her usual frown set in place.

"Excuse me Miss Sutherland," Miranda called as she softly knocked on the open door. "But I'm afraid my study room has been emptied. I was expecting to tutor Henry today."

Miss Sutherland continued writing on the board and Miranda wondered if she had even heard her. Setting down her chalk, Miss Sutherland turned to face her. If Miranda thought she had been frowning before, she appeared to be scowling now.

"Your tutoring services are no longer required," Miss Sutherland said sternly. "I expelled Mr. Tillman last week. I found little to no improvement in his literacy and therefore did not see the point in continuing his education."

It was like all the air had just left Miranda's lungs. And she didn't even get a chance to say goodbye or to at least tell him about his word blindness. "You don't understand," Miranda said. "It wasn't his fault-"

Miss Sutherland held up her hand to silence her. "I cannot have a student holding back the rest of the class. And if this school wants to expand, we can't have parents thinking that we are incapable of teaching our students how to read."

This was the opening Miranda was hoping for. "I had heard about the expansion and was actually going to submit an application for the new teaching position."

Miss Sutherland looked down her nose at her with a sneer. "You? This is a reputable school, Miss Edwards and it will not be accepting applications from those involved in scandals." Her sneer turned into a smug smile. "It appears you are no longer the respectable lady of society. And now even this school is too good for you."

Miranda knew that the gossip circulating about her would be harsh, but to have to hear it first hand was like a slap in the face. Miss Sutherland went back to her desk like Miranda didn't even exist anymore. Not wanting to give her the satisfaction of seeing her tears, Miranda left and exited the school, glad she was able to leave before the students had arrived.

Feeling defeated as she walked home, Miranda wondered what she was supposed to do now. "Lord", she prayed, "I feel lost. I'm trying to seek Your plan in all of this but I seem to keep running into closed doors. Please reveal Your purpose in all of this."

Although a heavy weight still hung on her shoulders as to how her family was going to live, Miranda had joy in knowing that she no longer had to carry it alone. Her thoughts then went to Henry and how heartbroken he must have been in getting expelled from school. And he really was such an excellent student.

Halting in her steps, Miranda was suddenly struck with the sense that she couldn't leave Henry believing that he would never be able to read or have an education. He had a right to know about his condition. It might even be able to save him from a life of hard labor. Her resolve set, Miranda knew what she needed to do. She needed to find Henry.