41. Remember what you said
"Hm." Jett stared at the paper, face scrunched in concentration. The dark splotch was supposed to be a building, but the problem was it looked more like a tree. Even to his own eyes, it failed to look anything close to what he knew it to be.
He huffed, abruptly shoving the paper off the little table. It slipped over the edge and floated gently to the floor, where it joined a carpet of discarded drawings. They littered the entire room, turning a once dark and damp cave into a bright swath of pale litter. It was an improvement, he thought, though Raven had made a very peculiar sort of face when he stopped by. It was the kind of face one made when viewing a giant heap of trash.
But Raven said nothing, and only brought another armful of paper. How he managed to procure such a rare commodity was a complete mystery, as Shann Tei was in no condition to be producing any type of paper products, recycled or otherwise. Jett wondered about it for all of seven seconds, before he decided it was more fun to try and draw Raven instead.
Forget drawing a house. A person was more fun anyway.
Grinning to himself, Jett grabbed a clean sheet of paper and bent over it, a small stubb of charcoal blackening his fingers as he dragged it carefully across the page. First, he needed to draw the head, and because Raven was so full of himself, it filled the top half of the page. The oval shape was a bit lopsided, but that was okay. He'd even it out by scribbling some more hair on that side.
As he worked, he ignored everything else. Seb came by and poked his bandaged face through the door, which was no longer locked at this point. He watched Jett engrossed in his drawing for a moment, then quietly slipped away without making a single sound.
Sometime later, another visitor came by. Unlike Seb however, this one lingered, leaning against the door frame with his blue hood pulled low over his face. Raven waited in silence, watching as Jett drew some freaky design. His lips lifted at the corners, though he didn't interrupt.
"Ha!" Jett suddenly slapped the piece of charcoal down on the table. He'd done it! This had to be his best masterpiece yet! Leaning back, he gently picked up the page with blackened fingers, holding it close, then far, tilting it this way and that.
Yep, it's perfect.
A giant head, topped with shaggy hair that was slightly thicker on the one side, and an expression that was something between a scowl and a murderous smile. Though to those who weren't familiar with Raven, it probably came across as just severely constipated. The rest of the body was comically smaller, with one thin arm propped on a hip, and the other outstretched like a tree branch, a crooked knife held in its little hand.
Jett had taken great care to color the bobble-head Raven's clothes black, because he had a black suit, but he'd embellished it with a glorious cape. It was a great cape, and Jett was quite proud of how it turned out. He beamed, unable to contain his pride as he took in his artwork.
"Finished?" A familiar voice drawled from the doorway.
Jett jerked, his knee banging into the underside of the table. His eyes widened once he realized who it was, and he hastily scrambled up from his chair, shoving his drawing behind his back. Suddenly, he felt extremely hesitant about his picture. Maybe it wouldn't be a good idea to show it to Raven. It was kind of embarrassing to be caught drawing him, anyway.
And he'd probably be insulted.
Jett blinked, tilting his head. He considered this last idea. Then he smiled mischievously.
"I drew a picture for you," he said, presenting his drawing. He watched as Raven hesitated, then took the offered page.
And just as Jett had done, he stared at it, tilted it, pulled it in close, tilted it the other way, then held it out at arms length. His lips twitched. "What...is it?"
Jett grinned. "It's you. Can't you tell?"
Silence. Raven didn't move, merely eyeing the drawing. Then he shifted his gaze from the paper to Jett, his expression hidden by his hood. His voice, however, told Jett all he needed to know. "Hm. Of course I could. Who else would wear such a wonderful coat?"
The grin vanished from Jett's face, replaced by a dark look. "It's not a coat. It's a cape. And you totally couldn't tell!"
"That's a cape?" Raven sounded dubious. He turned the page upside down, as if that would help him see it better.
"Yes!" Jett went to snatch the page back, but Raven was faster, lifting it out of his reach. "Anyone would know that even if they were missing both eyes!"
"Huh. My mistake, then." With a few deft movements, Raven folded the sheet into quarters, then tucked it into his coat pocket. Jett eyed the offending pocket, then glanced up at Raven, contemplating his chances.
They were absolutely nil, he realized. He crossed his arms, annoyed.
"Did you finish what Seb gave you?" Raven asked. He didn't seem to notice the dark look Jett was throwing his way.
"Yes." It was buried somewhere in the pile of pages on the table, but Jett had no doubt Seb would have no issues digging them out. The weird guy always seemed to know where to find things.
"What did he have you doing this time?" Raven tilted his head, the huge blue hood shifting upon his hood so part of his nose and cheek became visible. Why he insisted on wearing that thing all the time, Jett had no idea. It was getting ridiculous.
Jett scratched at his cheek. The scabs had fallen off his scratches, leaving itchy new skin behind. In time, they'd fade away, leaving no sign of their existence, and he couldn't wait for them to be gone. "He wanted me to draw two things that changed my life. One for the better, and one for the worse. And then we were supposed to talk about it later."
"Oh?" Raven sounded interested. He gestured for Jett to follow him, and then stepped out of the doorway into the outside tunnel. "What did you draw?"
Jett followed, shoving his hands deep into the pockets of his trousers. He'd gotten used to wearing normal civilian clothes now, but he still preferred the comfort of his suit. It was like a second skin that didn't wear and tear and that didn't need to be cleaned all the time. He made a face behind Raven's back, secretly irritated that Raven still withheld the main piece of his flyer suit. Nearly all the external pieces of his suit had been returned, and sat in their own corner of his little room.
He huffed out a sigh. "I drew us on the Wall. And then I drew us on the bus."
"The bus?" Raven sounded surprised. "Really?"
Jett ducked his head, feeling heat rush to his face. "Well, that's when I met you. It didn't seem like a good thing at the time, but if it hadn't happened, I wouldn't have known I had a brother."
"Ah." There was silence from Raven after that. They walked for several minutes before Raven spoke again. "Jett. Do you think I'm a bad person?"
The question caught Jett completely off guard. "What?"
"Just answer it. Do you think I'm a bad person?" Raven kept walking, without so much as a glance in Jett's direction.
A frown creased Jett's forehead. "Of course not. Why would you even ask that?"
"I've killed a lot of people, Jett. And I've done some terrible things. Doesn't that make me bad?"
"But -" Jett sputtered, then quickened his pace so he walked at Raven's side. He tilted his head, trying to peer beneath that hood for some hint of what his brother was thinking. "I'm sure you didn't have a choice. It's part of war."
"There's always a choice, Jett," came the eerily calm answer. "The things I've done, I could easily have refused to do so."
"But at what cost?" Jett tried to hide his unease, a twisting snake that coiled within his belly. "Sometimes you have to fight so you survive. If you didn't, you'd die. And I know Troit is stupid - they give dumb orders and you have to do them or else. "
"So if Troit ordered you to kill a child, would you do it?"
Jett faltered. "I - no! I wouldn't!"
"Even if your refusal would cost you your life?"
"I'm not going to kill a child!" Jett clenched his hands.
Raven's hood shifted towards him. "So then, you have a choice."
"Well, I guess so." Though that choice didn't have a happy ending either way. The snake tightened into a solid ball, forming a heaviness that sat in his gut like a stone. Jett didn't know why Raven brought this up, and he didn't like it. It made him uncomfortable.
"I've made the wrong choice many times," Raven softly said. He turned down a tunnel that had been hewn out of solid rock, and their boots crunched on the loose stone on the ground. "I've killed innocents. Women. Children. Their blood is on my hands, Jett. Because for the longest time, I lacked the courage to stand up for what was right."
Jett's feet came to a stop. He stared at Raven's back as the Talon kept walking. However, after a few steps, Raven seemed to have sensed that Jett was no longer following, and came to a stop as well. He turned around. The two of them regarded each other in silence.
To Jett, Raven was the strongest person he knew. To hear him say such things was like getting a punch to the gut. He couldn't wrap his mind around it.
"I'm not very brave," Raven walked over to Jett. He stopped an arm's width away, and looked down at him. "And I'm not very smart. I've done a lot of bad things, hurt a lot of people, and lived a lie for most of my life. I listened to the wrong people, did what they told me, and didn't think of the consequences. I'm the worst kind of person there is."
Jett shook his head, dropping his gaze to his feet. Why was Raven saying this now? Was this what he really thought of himself? He couldn't believe it. The Raven he knew was unmovable and defiant. Undefeatable. Yet here he was, admitting the very opposite.
It made Jett's head spin. He could barely process any of this.
"And then I met you," Raven went on, voice soft. "I knew who you were the moment I saw you, because you were the spitting image of him. You were so small, yet so determined. You made Gray's life a nightmare." He chuckled, and Jett couldn't help but lift his gaze. This close, he was barely able to make out Raven's face beneath the shadows of his hood.
Raven smiled faintly. "He's tried to train a handful of Talons before, you know. Every last one of them gave up and quit after the first few days. You were the only one he couldn't shake off. Too stubborn to give up. And, you were the only one that actually managed to run away."
Despite himself, Jett couldn't help but give a small smile of his own. That seemed so long ago, the day he outwitted Raven and dove right off a cliff to escape him. He thought he'd succeeded, too, until he learned that getting away from a Talon was no easy thing.
"It made me realize that if a tiny kid can stand up to Troit, then perhaps I could as well. After all, it would just look terrible if the teacher was outshone by the student."
Tiny?! The rest was lost in that one insult, and Jett scowled. So what if he was smaller than most?! That didn't mean he couldn't match them in a fight! "Who are you calling tiny?!"
That earned him a rough pat to the head. He ducked beneath the offending arm, though he wasn't truly irritated. There was a strange warmth in his chest, and it overpowered all the unease and uncertainty he'd felt mere moments ago. He really thinks that of me? But he's the one who's been so strong!
Jett looked up at his brother, feeling somewhat embarrassed by the praise. "You're not a bad person," he said seriously. "We've all done bad things, but what matters is that we do our best to help others. And you've definitely done that here with this underground city, even if it is kind of creepy and weird."
"Heh." Amusement colored Raven's voice. "I'm glad you think so. But you better remember what you just said. I'm not the only one it applies to."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Jett furrowed his brow.
Raven didn't answer, but resumed his journey through the tunnels. That annoyed Jett, but he didn't stay bothered for long. He hurried to catch up to his brother, thinking over what the Talon had said. This conversation had come out of the blue, but it felt important somehow. Though as to why, he wasn't sure yet.
He was learning that Raven never did anything without reason.
"Where are we going now?" He asked, finally unable to bear the silence any longer.
"I thought you might want to look at some art," Raven said lightly.
"Art?" Had he heard that correctly? For the second time, Jett was thrown for a loop.
"Yes, art." There was a certain smugness in Raven's tone as he continued, "Didn't you know? I have a very nice collection of rare paintings."
Jett almost let out a disbelieving laugh. Raven had to be kidding, right? Or was he? "Where would you even get stuff like that?"
"I told you before," Raven stopped suddenly. It was then Jett realized they stood in front of a rusted metal door that had an old-fashioned latch and lock. Raven produced a set of keys, which he held up for Jett's inspection. They jangled merrily when he gave them a little shake.
Raven smirked. "I have friends in high places."
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