To my friend practically crap liquid

Then watched her puke

And be perfectly fine afterwards

Also, told my grandma

Me: //texting// Yeah, I'll be home a bit later, Dez has the Hershey squirts

Grandma: Oh nice

Me: It sounds like the noise a ketchup bottle makes when it's almost gone, but into a megaphone

Grandma: Wow

Me: I bet it looks like straight coffee (no creamer)

Grandma: Stop.

Me: Willy Wonka has a bone to pick with her

Grandma: Selena, stop

Me: Sorry, I'm doing it for shits and giggles. Well, at least the giggles.

Grandma: Goodbye