How to get out of any conversation
Act like you're going to fart, grab your butt and run out of the room screaming: "That wasn't a fart!!"
If you're outdoors, do the same thing but run in the direction of the nearest toilet or a bunch of bushes or trees.
P.S. I farted and nearly crapped my pants. Dad, are you proud of me?! ^/)0(\^
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