(This will be all over the place.)

I'm not mentally in the right state right now.

I feel like no one cares, and the only times I felt like myself were online, but now I feel like I'm not me... I can't be the crackhead I am, I just can't be me... Every second I am driven farther towards committing, but I try to stay strong, but I can't. I used to think 'what would *online friend* say' or '*online friend* would be proud' ONLY TO LEARN THEY DON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT ME. I used to push myself to do good things for others. only to learn they don't care...

I just need a mental health day, but with school and then christmas coming up, I can't. But, if I disappear, just know the stress got to me. Just know if I never return I'm long gone... <3

But, if I leave but I do return, it's probably a failed attempt... Please just, don't worry if I do, alright?