So I know this book is silly and funny, but I really just needed to vent..I dont think anyone will read this, and if you do, Hi! TW:suicidal thoughts/actions talk about suicide notes

Now that you've left if you needed to, I'm okayish. Just. Idk. Like I was cleaning my room and came across the notes I wrote when I had a plan to kill myself. I'm better now. Its just passive instead of active thoughts now. But I reread them and realised that even then I think I was trying to stay. I wrote so many letters and titled others so I would have to write them. Its just so overwhelming I guess. I read them then ripped them up and threw them away. I was proud of myself and my progress for like two minutes before my brain urged me to write new ones. For now I'm not though. Any who sorry for the rant I know this is supposed to be a silly book...thanks for reading if you did.