Enough With Your Loud Screech and Annoying, Yet Slightly Enjoyable Arguments

Dear Four,

I have always felt overjoyed living near to you. You are the most loud neighbour a person could ever meet.

Therefore, you must understand how difficult it has been for me to approach you with this matter.

I'm afraid I can no longer stand your screeching/killing.

I lay in bed last night, trying to sleep, and all I could think about was how your screech is too loud and your arguments way too annoying, yet slightly enjoyable. I had a nightmare that you burst in through the window brandishing a knife

I have to insist that you take action to stop your screeching/killing from upsetting me. I demand that you stop the screeching then stop arguing with X about having a divorce.

And while we're on the matter, I'm finding your arguing about a divorce increasingly inexcusable. This is not the kind of behaviour I expect from somebody living in a peaceful neighbourhood like Dream Street.

If you don't rectify the situation I shall have no choice but to call the FBI and post photos of your screeching/killing on YouTube.

Furthermore, I have close ties with gangsters and I won't be be afraid to cash in a few favours if you don't comply with my demands.

Thanks
Foldy