i wanna draw something but my body wont allow me to. i wanna do something that makes me happy like writing iruouma but i cant write the words arent coming into my head. im not going crazy with everything i can prove right? im not misunderstanding and spreading misinformation right? the integration messed me up, am i me anymore? do i belong here with such amazing people, cool friends, and such handsome, funny, and sweet boyfriend?