hm,, honestly? i hate life, i cried in the shower and pulled my hair out, no big deal. i felt slightly better seeing pictures of shus ass and thinking about amasai,,, but then the feeling came back and now its slowly stopping,,,, but im beginning to jump at the slightest noise and hit myself, nothing new. theres many things i want, many things i would want to ask for but i wont, im too kind and rather help others. this isnt a vent but honesty, this is my book and i decided what i want yet i feel like it isnt? am i listening to suicidal songs? yes i am. do i care about your pleads? hmm no, let me thrown out again okay? let me,,, believe im nothing k? just shut up and agree for me, thats all i ask for it