Ranking TCNSAN characters based on whether they'd survive a zombie apocalypse or not!

And because the idea's been in my head for HOURS now.

OH! Also I'm only using characters that have:

1. Been introduced to the readers

2. Had 1 or more voice lines

(Ranked from 'Definitely' down to 'Nope' with little explanations for each character)

1: DEFINITELY

• Tommy

Tommy has a very high chance to survive because of a few things; one, his wings. He can fly away from danger if necessary. Also, he was a street kid for a while AND he knows how to fight, so it'll be easy for him to find food and fend for himself. Even though he doesn't have a power, he'd still manage.

• Sapnap

Honestly? He's definitely surviving. All he needs to do is hold his hands out and all the zombies will literally catch on fire. The only concern for him would be finding food, but I don't think it's that much of an issue. If he gets cornered; boom, torch the zombies and GTFO.

• Jack

He's surviving for pretty much the same reasons as Sapnap. Just don't let him get hit by a knife or he'll be out of commision for months! Hah. I'm so funny.

• Persephone

Again, wings. Also, her power would make it pretty easy. Just energy-blast or energy-shield the zombies and fly away. 

• Slimecicle(Charlie, Slimeball, Slime)

He would survive purely because he can't be turned into a zombie. He's literally just slime. Don't let him near any lava, though, he might be shoved in!

• Ponk

Some of you might be asking 'oh, but author, Ponk is like a six or seven year old kid, how would he ever survive a zombie apocalypse-'

Plot armor. 

Our sweet bby Ponk has all the plot armor.

2. PROBABLY

• Techno

I know, I know, everyone's going to be like 'oh author Techno would 100% survive he should be in definitely HE has the plot armor technoblade never dies-'

TUMOASD.

If he misses one more goddamn jump, he's gone.

In all seriousness, though, he'd probably survive(Hence the category title), the only exceptions being if he has to jump anywhere(ITCFWI; giving y'all flashbacks since 2025) or if he's entirely surrounded. I don't know if his bloodbending power will work on the zombies, because idk if they have blood. I've never seen a zombie movie. So I'll let y'all decide.

• Phil

Wings. The only reason he isn't in 'definitely' is his power. His power is controlling life force(One he doesn't usually use[which is why I never talk about it]) and the zombies don't really have a life force to control. He'd probably survive, though, since he's not reliant on his powers.

• Ranboo

They can teleport, which would make for a lot of easy escapes. But They're really not built for an apocalypse. That's sort of all I have to say.

• Tubbo

His power(Which I hardly ever talk about as well) is explosive hands; so he can pretty much explode stuff with his hands. He likes his nukes, though. I can only see him dying if his mechanical wings break or if he's cornered.

• Sam

I can't spoil too much but I'm giving him a way to get around(Or, in this case, escape) so, like in Tubbo's, I can only see him dying if he's cornered. Also, his power would be useless against zombies. I haven't introduced it yet, but it's coming up soon, I promise!

3. MAYBE

• Niki

I feel like she works better as a unit, with someone else, so if she's alone, it would be harder for her. I also don't know how useful water powers would be. I mean, she can wash zombies away... and...

You know what? Maybe that would be useful. Maybe she should be in probably. But I've already started writing all of this here.

'oH bUt AuThOr JuSt CoPy AnD pAsTe It StOp BeInG a LaZy PoTaTo'

No.

• Wilbur

Wilbur, the guy with a cool voice. He can do a little silly levitation trick thingy but unless zombies can be lured to sleep, then he's a little helpless. We're talking about the guy who got knocked out by a folding chair, people.

• Purpled

The actual levitating guy. He can levitate, that's for sure. But there's going to be no cell service, which means his phone will be useless, which means he won't be able to survive. Obviously.

• Quackity

It's really a... gambit... with him(Hah, I'm so funny) because, you know, he has wings, but he's also gotten used to stuff being given to him on a silver platter - often literally. He throws knives, but if he runs out of knives to throw and places to go, what's a lonesome duck boy gonna do?

• Miko

He's an icy boi, dats for sure. Wings + ratio. But he would probably struggle to find resources. He's rather dependent on Willow, if you haven't noticed. And ice can only get you so far.

• Grapnel

He has his grapnel, so he has a way to get around. But he'd also struggle for resources and he's not so good at taking on enemies when he's not one-on-one with them. So, like most of the others(I'm seeing a pattern here), he'd be helpless if cornered.

• Capricorn

Who would win? A horde of brainless zombies or one braindead drunk boi? Probably the horde of zombies, let's be real. His hallucination stuff wouldn't even work on them sooo-

4. PROBABLY NOT

• Willow

She's great. She's cool. She may suck at acrobatics and be bad at close combat fighting, but who cares? The zombies. That's who. And she doesn't have a power to use against them, so I'd say - especially without Miko - she's a goner. Even with wings.

• Dream

Oooh, boy. That brother gone. If the zombies get near him, it's over. What's he gonna do? Smile at them? Preform 'Mask: Sus Remix'? On second thought, please, dear Kristen, do not. My point still stands, though, he's gone.

5. DEFINITELY NOT

• No one's here, if I'm gonna be honest.

Thoughts on the chapter?

Thoughts on the book in general?

Favorite character so far?

Words: 981

Have a great day, night, and year!

1/1/2025