What I Did to Fangirl Feelings
Basically, I used to be a fangirl that squealed at how cute Syaoran was all the time.
In fact, so much that I mainly loved him for his cuteness.
I never realized until I thought about it.
I thought I loved Syaoran for his kindness, but then...how do you explain why I didn't fall for Raku?
Raku is just as selfless....
And I felt more affection towards Rito than Raku, despite that Rito wasn't as selfless.
So I realized there.
It was because of cuteness.
So I eliminated my feelings of how cute Syaoran was, and surprisingly, it was as though I didn't love him anymore.
I could easily see him as just a friend.
I decided to build up affection by reading more TC while dismissing my thoughts of him being cute.
But thanks to the spoilers I read before everything got serious (crew arrives at Tokyo) and how much I concentrated on loving him by his appearance before,
It wasn't much of a success.
I still love Syaoran, and the affection came around slowly, just not to the point where I really love him. :(
Also, it was because I read 7 or 8 chapters of Niraikanai Hen beforehand.
Well, considering all the spoilers...
I KNOW that my affection towards Syaoran would be much stronger if only I hadn't read all of that spoilers.
I mean, I'm GLAD that I read some of them, but I read TOO much.
I was a foolish child.
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