I thought I never needed love, or light.  I thought I could manage on my own. It has always been that way. A few crushes down the road, plenty of mistakes, regrets and tears. It all seemed so futile and so idealistic. Rejection after rejection. Sometimes because of the way I look, sometimes because of the sound of my voice, sometimes just because I am different. Years of repeating the same damn thing. You would think that it would be different this time, but it stayed exactly the same. It made my eyes cold and void, and it cursed my cold soul.

But, tell me please. How can you have so much light in you? How can you colour my world with every smile? How can you be an angel in my faithless world?

How come I never have enough time with you, how come my breath stops everytime you speak to me? How come every damn love song I ever heard, now makes sense?

How can you love these void eyes, this cold soul, this ugly skin? How can you love someone so ambitionless, even after everyone else left? How can you listen to this horrible voice, without running away?

I thought love never existed for me, that I wasn't worthy of a feeling like that. I thought that maybe, I was punished for not being able to love, or to be loved. But I was wrong.

I didn't know love, because I never knew you before.

My shining light, my strong lily, my beautiful better half. I know you might think this is just rambling of a love-sick person, but I hope you still read it.

My love, I hope you help others find love, just like you helped me. I hope you keep giving love, like you always do, because I surely love you.