I promised keepcalmandmagic that I would post another chapter of Gems as soon as I could.

*FLIPS TABLE OVER DRAMATICLY* AND GUESS HOW LONG AGO THAT WAS?

*sobbing quietly in a ball on the floor* I try I try I try...

*PULLS ICE DAGGER OUT OF NOWHERE AND STARTS STABBING RANDOM THINGS* IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII TTTTTTTTTTTTRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm trying to write chapter 9 but it

just

isn't

WORKING

STAB STAB STAB STAB STAB STAB STAB STAB STAB STAB STAB STAB STAB 

calm down pomp

breath in,

breath out.

and keepcalmandmagic doesn't have to feel bad because it actually kind of feels nice to have people constantly begging for the next chapter, even though I don't understand how you could possibly like my sorry excuse for writing.

but sometimes it can be stressful. Imagine, a busy day at school. When you get home all you want to do is sit down for a few moments and do nothing, because the day has been so busy. You would sleep, but there isn't enough time before dinner for a nap.

All of the sudden, out of no where, two younger children pop up and start dancing around you singing "You should be writing, finish chapter x, You should be writing, finish chapter x,  You should be writing, finish chapter x,  You should be writing, finish chapter x,  You should be writing, finish chapter x,  You should be writing, finish chapter x,  You should be writing, finish chapter x,  You should be writing, finish chapter x,  You should be writing, finish chapter x,  You should be writing, finish chapter x,  You should be writing, finish chapter x,  You should be writing, finish chapter x... "

All you want is peace and quiet. You've been trying to write all day but it's never enough. At the dinner table, you're parents aren't as annoying about it but they do mention it's been a while since you've finished a chapter.

You go to church, where you should be doing churchy things, right? But instead you get a sabrina clinging on your arm threatening to kill you if you don't post something on wattpad soon.

Then, when you try to actually sit down and write, there's to much pressure from others and it just makes you break down.

I feel like I'm in constant nanowrimo. A month here and there of nanowrimo is ok, but 24/7 is too much...

I need sleep. I need food. I have school and homework. I have friends and family that I want to see. I have tv shows I like to watch. I like to read. I have video games I like to play. I enjoy skiing. I have a cat. Carpentry is fun. I'M NOT SOME KIND OF TYPING MACHINE THAT GOES KLICKETY CLICK KLACK 24/7!

Everyone wonders why I'm always so tired. Everyone wonders how I've gone so insane.

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"I am a writer" I say as I’m staring at the blank piece of paper for hours.

"I love writing" I say, grinding my teeth and breaking my pencil in half.

"Writing keeps me sane" I say, laughing like a maniac and spinning my head around 360 degrees while climbing up the wall.

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That's my favorite tumblr post right there.

Anyway, you don't have to stop reminding me to update. Every day I'm tempted to delete my whole account (because of major low self-esteem issues that I should probably try to fix) but then I see those awesome PLEASE UPDATE comments and I remember Sabrina and I decide not do delete anything. Thank you. Those comments are what keep me going.

But every once and a while I start feeling bad because I'm such a slow writer and I get really stressed out and if you've ever succesfully strung words together in a way that doesn't sound like 1000 cats all throwing up at once while you're stressed then you are going to be very succesful in life because even when I'm not stressed my writing still sounds like that.

I'm sorry. I need to stop beating myself up over things. Can't be healthy I'm sure.

buT HOW DO YOU EVEN LIKE THIS WRITING SO MUCH? I don't get it. Go read colloseum. That's actually good writing not... whatever this is! *Waves hand wildly towards my other two stories*

AnYwAy keepcalmandmagic I'm so sorry I havn't posted anything like I promised. I'm working on it. Blame Josh for my lack of updates. Blame Josh for everything. That's what I do anyway.

And Sabrina if you read this, Happy Birthday! You're wonderful. I heard sage on the radio today wishing you a happy birthday. And keep threatening to kill me if you want, it's really not a problem :)