Hey guys who read this. Um, not sure if any of you care to know, but my birthday is in November, I'll be turning 16.

I'll be honest, I thought I wouldn't make it pass 12. I'm worried about the future. I know I shouldn't, but it's weighing on my shoulders. I can't do much, I mess up, and I'm not the brightest when it comes to school. I want to write, but I highly doubt I'll be able to make it. I'm completely lost and I don't know what I can do once my time is up. I don't know if I'll be able to make it out in the world.

I want to be of use to the world, be able to grant peace of mind to my family that I did something amazing, of use of my life. But I feel like I can't do anything. I want to run off to my grandmother's home and abide to their rules and the role they want me to do, to take on the family business or to do what they want of me from the very beginning.

I'm scared to face the world. I know I still have time and I can stay with my mother, but I know I will have to leave and go on my own, live my life, but what if I can't handle it and I won't be able to bear it? I fear I am not enough. I fear I am unable to go on as my own person when I do not know who or what I am. I find it harder and harder to understand this path I walk on.

I fear I am unable to previde anything good or be able to just live a simple life. I worry I will not even be able to go far in this life.
How people do it, I'll never know... I just know people have their hardships, but how is it that they just bear through and continue on? I'll never know.