A/n: Smut warning :)

When I hear you sing, it gets hard to breathe. Can't help but think every song's about me. And every line, every word that I write. You are the muse in the back of my mind, oh.

She stood on the stage, a grin on her lips as her hips swayed and she sang. Her eyes were closed and she was completely sober. She'd been dared, but once she got up there she'd requested a song and started singing and no one could look away.

She sang the song about burning love and aching want, her face scrunched and her body sagged in exhaustion as she exerted all of her emotional ability to channel it and release it all into the song. Sweet Pea watched her, his hands shaking as his throat closed.

Not only did she sing wonderfully and look more beautiful than ever delivering such passion through something she was surprisingly so good at, but the words she sang... The way she sang them..

Her eyes opened and landed on him and her voice caught in her throat, her words cutting off as the last chord of the song rang out and then ended. She stood there a second, her and him staring at each other.

The moment was pure vulnerability. She finally slipped off of the stage and moved to the floor. They stared at each other from across the room. Her eyes watered and so did his. It was so clear that they wanted each other in that moment that neither of them could deny it.

Neither knew how or when but they were hopelessly in love with the other.

Ready to finally give it all up and just have her for his, Sweet Pea let his heart hope as he took steps towards her, tentative and terrified. She saw that fear and her brain screamed at her to run. Run as fast and as far as she could. Demanded her to do anything and everything to get as far away as possible from those wide, loving eyes and those arms she was so close to finally feeling around her. Her heart froze and she turned and ran. And ran and ran and ran.

Sweet Pea was left there, his face twisting in pain as he blinked, a tear falling down his face. His eyebrows furrowed as he wiped it away. He breathed hard and fast, trying to collect his thoughts and his feelings to try and get a grip on himself.

But no. He had opened himself up and she had seen it and rejected it and ran. Just like he thought she would. He'd gotten his heart broken, just like he knew he would, and they hadn't even begun. They hadn't even started anything and it was already over.

He went home that night. Sweet Pea had never cried so endlessly.

-

English class came around and it had been a full month since she had talked to him or he had talked to her after that night when they had the face off and everything fell apart. The ache was worse than ever and when the English teacher announced that for the new part of the unit that had begun, they were going to take all they'd learned about poetry in the last weeks of classes about poetry and would write their own poems.

Sweet Pea's first thought was to gag or roll his eyes and he stared at his paper for a long time.

Then his mind filled with her. The way she smiled and the sound of her laugh. How her eyebrows knit when she was frustrated or how her lips curved when she was concentrated. How her mouth formed when she was speaking Spanish. How her eyes always found him and how every little teeny tiny thing she did took another piece of him and claimed it as her own.

He began to write, all he knew filling his head as he turned the information and theory of poetry into practice. It was therapeutic, getting all of his thoughts and feelings so well onto the paper. Organizing them and expressing them. The weight lifted off of his chest and he actually got choked up and emotional.

It was pathetic really. She ruined him even when she was nowhere to be seen.

Could he really never escape her?

Don't want to ask about it 'cause you might brush it off. I'm afraid you think that it means nothing at all. I don't know why I won't admit that you're all I want...

The teacher had proofread and worked with him to perfect the poem. He carried it around with him in his wallet, wondering if he should give it to her. He wanted to. He wanted her to know EXACTLY how he felt. To FEEL what she was doing to him. He felt giddy, having the words so perfectly formed on a piece of paper he could easily hand to her and leave so he didn't have to see her reaction as she read and then processed.

He saw her often in the hall and in his friend group. He had plenty of opportunities...

Each time, the fear got to him. He began to avoid her actively. He began to avoid everyone. He couldn't shake the terrible feeling that he would open up to her for real this time, pour his heart out and tell her every little detail of the power she had over him just for her to shrink away again.

He didn't want to put himself on the table, completely exposed and ask her her opinion just for her to turn away and give nothing back. She was so guarded and closed off, even more than him, and it was hard to be willing to reveal yourself to such a hidden person.

When the opportunity arose, he tried. He really, really tried. He stood in front of her, having pulled her aside to a private place in an empty room. His mind raced and his tongue grew dry and thick and numb in his mouth. His hands grew sweaty and his body locked, the poem in his pocket seeming to sear and burn against his skin.

He'd written her poetry?! When did he become the love sick puppy who ever, EVER did anything like that?

She'd laugh at him. Turn and run again like before. She'd turn him down nicely and tell him he'd been wrong this whole time. Maybe she'd even liked him once, but not anymore. She'd tried to make it clear without being rude but he was too oblivious...

Or, worse yet, she would stare at him with fear filled, wide eyes, and say nothing at all. She would dodge questions and shift uncomfortably, ducking her head and giving no straight answer. She dip her head and brush him off, making a quick escape and leaving alone, broken and rejected.

As the self doubt and loathing set in, fear swallowing him whole, she grew concerned. Her hand reached out, settling against his arm. He flinched and her eyebrows came together tightly. "Sweets? What's wrong? What did you need to tell me?"

He looked at her. Really looked at her.

I love you.

But he couldn't say it.

Instead he turned away from her, racing out of the room. It was his turn to run away.

I pretend that I'm not ready. Why do we put each other through hell? Why can't we just get over ourselves? And you say 'hi' like you just met me- Why do we put each other through hell? Why can't we just get over ourselves?

They stood face to face once again, this time because they had no other options. Toni and Fangs stood there. "Talk," Toni demanded. "Now."

"I don't know what you want either of us to say," the girl who held Sweet Pea's heart whispered, avoiding meeting anyone's eyes.

Sweet Pea snapped, emotion taking over him. "She doesn't love me." This he directed to Toni, turning to face the significantly shorter Serpent. The girl he was speaking of flinched, her eyes widening in fear at just the mention of the damned word. "She couldn't even if she tried. She's too scared and too closed off. Let us leave, Toni, you're wrong."

Toni's face softened. "Do you love her?"

All eyes in the room turned to Sweet Pea, who looked at his feet. He felt small for the first time in his life, even though he had to look down at every single person making him feel that way. Eventually, he sighed. He could keep this in forever or he could let it out now. Get it over with, take the rejection, and move on. He reached into his back pocket, taking out his wallet and opening it.

Everyone watched in confusion as Sweets reached inside the wallet, taking out a folded up and crumpled and bent piece of paper. He looked the girl he loved straight in the face, holding it out to her. "Read it," he encouraged.

Hands shaking, she took it from him gingery like it was a bomb about to go off instead of a harmless slice of dead tree. She unfolded it gently as not to rip or ruin it any further than it was already worn. Too scared to test her voice, the girl read it silently, her eyes slowly falling over each letter of each word.

When she finished, she slowly lowered the paper. It had taken her minutes to read the one page worth of scribbled words and Toni and Fangs exchanged wide eyed looks of surprise as her drastic change of mood. Her eyes had gone wide and her body shook, her hands making the paper make noises as the air blew against it with her vibrating movements.

As a heavy mood settled int he room, Toni and Fangs slipped out of the room. Sweet Pea looked at his feet, too insecure to meet her eyes. He felt raw and exposed. He'd finally given it to her and her reaction was nothing near anything he'd expected, even in the desperate imagined scenes where she loved him back.

"Say something," he begged, croaking. 

She looked at the paper. "I... don't know what to say."

His face contorted and she closed her eyes. This was it. She was choosing to give in to her fear and push him away. She was really about to give up everything because she was scared, after everything he had done to conquer his fear and finally tell her the truth. She was STILL running from him. He started shaking like a leaf, a lump forming in his throat that seemed to have spikes, making his insides burn with agony along with his inability to breathe or think.

And then her hands were on his face and she pulled him to her, pressing their lips together.

The tears that had been gathering in Sweet Pea's eyes without his permission now fell as the lump seemed to magically disappear. Her touch, her kiss. It healed him. He pulled her towards him, his hands clawing as he held her against him. His lips began working feverishly against hers.

For once, both were glad to be alone in Sweet Pea's bedroom together. It wasn't awkward, full of withheld wanting and shameful workings of the imagination that made both shift with lust that gathered between their legs, never to be addressed or released.

This time, she lead him to the bed, her knees hitting the edge of it before he finally broke the kiss to lay back on it, crawling to the head board. Sweet Pea didn't hesitate to follow her, crawling over and reconnecting their lips again when she reached her destination.

I pretend that I'm not ready- Why do we put each other through hell? Why can't we just get over ourselves? And you say hi like you just met me- Why do we put each other through hell? Why can't we just get over ourselves?

His hands moved form her waist up, slipping under her shirt and pushing it up and up and until he completely pulled it off of her. While they were part, she tugged on his shirt too and he smirked before lifting off his own shirt as well. 

Their lips smashed together again only a second before Sweet Pea moved away, his lips moving from her lips to her jaw and then to her neck. He wasted no time leaving purple bruises all over neck, marking her as his. They both released a breath properly for the first time since this thing between them had started. Finally she was his and they could both be relieved of their burning want.

He smirked. "You look good in purple." She chuckled breathlessly in response and he reached down, his strong hands pressing against her core. Her laughter turned to whimpering gasps and he grinned wider. "Let me make you feel good, Princess."

She swallowed hard. "Please," she begged. "I need you."

Responding to her plea, he moved to where she needed him, making a trail from her neck to the space between her breasts to her stomach to her waist and then lower, leaving purple behind him decorating her skin. Her stomach moved fast as her breathing became sporadic. His fingers hooked in her waistband. "You sure?" He asked, scared she would stop it all now that he had given her a second to think.

She didn't even pause. "God, yes." He slowly pulled her pants down and off of her, leaving her in her underwear. He kissed her thighs, enjoying the sight of her squirming as his hot breath and lips on her skin drove her wild. "PLEASE, Sweets."

"Sorry, Princess," he purred, finally pulling her panties down too. She grunted upon feeling the cold air on her, needing him to just eat her out and make the pleasure come. She needed it to be him. Not anyone else. She didn't just need the sex, she needed it with HIM. Giving into her needs, he dipped hid head, his tongue pressing to her. A gasp shook her body as it rose and fell out of her body- someone tripping and falling down the stairs; hard, loud, and choppy.

His tongue moved and her hands reached out, grabbing the sheets as a soft moan left her next, her eyes closing in relief. It felt wonderful, just knowing it was him enough to drive her to be fulfilled past what anyone else could do. It helped eternally that he knew what he was doing, licking and tracing and sucking in every way that seemed to drive her closer to her edge.

Sweet Pea was gentle and slow, moving his mouth higher so that he could slip a finger inside of her. A throaty moan sounded from her and Sweet Pea reveling in the sounds he was pulling. He hummed against her and she shivered, her breaths shorty and gasping. "M-more," she begged.

Adding another finger, he pumped faster and harder, shoving his fingers deeper and curling harder. She grunted, her hips bucking to meet his hands needily. She could feel him smiling against him as he watched her come undone and she couldn't handle it anymore.

"Sweets?"

"Hm?" he hummed, sending another wave of pleasure up her body from where he tasted her, eating her like she was cake. 

"Can you please fuck me? I want to feel you inside of me. I want to see you come undone too. Hear you be pleasured with me. I want to see you fuck me."

Sweet Pea swallowed, his member plenty hard just hearing her talk. She was gentle and quiet, just genuinely expressing what she wanted rather than using her words to drive him further. But further it did drive him.

He was stripped and exposed in just two heartbeats, hovering over her. He gave her a quick kiss and her eyes widened at the taste of her on his lips. "Take your bra off for me, Princess? I need to do something really fast..." She did as he asked, looking over as he reached into his drawer, grabbing out a condom. Supporting himself with one hand, he only had one other to work with. He opened the package with his teeth and she swallowed.

Closing her eyes again, she waited as he put the condom on. He leaned close, pressing a kiss to her throat. "Are you ready?"

"So ready," she grunted. He shivered.

Lining himself up with her, he leaned his lips against the shell of her ear. "Tell me if it hurts, Princess." She nodded and he pressed his lips to her neck as he pushed his length inside of her. A growl sounded in the back of his throat, his lips pressed to her skin so he wouldn't moan. Her moan came out though, gruff and bubbly and needy. She gasped. He paused as she winced and then moved when she nodded and they moved that way until he was all the way inside of her. Her legs moved as they paused, letting her adjust to him. Her legs wrapped around his waist and her arms rose to, the tips of her fingers resting on his skin. He smiled. "Scratch me up."

She chuckled. "Like I need you to ask. You leave your marks in hickies. I scratch."

Sweet Pea caught his breath, pulling out a bit and then moving back in again. He began a rhythm as she signaled him she was good, rocking in and out of her. Their breath became labored and deep and choppy and fast, their bodies moving in perfect sync to the beat he made. When he felt it was time, guided by her voicing herself, he moved faster.

One of her hands moved to his hair, her fingers twisting into the dark locks. She pulled gently and he moaned. She jumped, loving the little whine at the end when the moan ended. 

He kept his thrusts up and she joined him, bringing her hips up hard to meet him. It felt so good to feel him inside of her, filling her up and making her whole body light on fire as wave after wave of euphoria hit her. It was slow but strong and she got to enjoy every single second without any rush or expectation. It wasn't hard or demanding. He wasn't fucking the life out of her. He was...

He was making love to her.

Slow and deep and intimate and meaningful. Every move he made he made with purpose and intent and she could feel it. 

The knot she came to know well formed in the pit of her stomach, but it was Sweet Pea who breathlessly whispered, "I'm close." Just as he said that, his movements got less controlled and more wild and sporadic.

Her high came faster. "Me too." He hit her g spot and she choked out a half scream. He paused i surprise at the reaction before closing his eyes and concentrating on hitting that spot every time. Her breaths turned to whimpers and moans and curses fell along with his name from her mouth. He felt her walls pressing against his cock and he bit back a moan as he refused to cum first, wanting to drive her as far as he could and knowing it would be worth the wait once he got there.

It suddenly turned into a race to see who could hold it the longest. She was messy and so tight that it was driving Sweet Pea mad. "Cum for me, Princess," he grunted. "Let go. I want to finish you off first. I want to see you come undone under me. I want to see that pretty face of yours when I finish you off. You feel so good Princess. I feel so good inside of you."

Her nails pressed into his back and he winced as she dragged them down, finally releasing her orgasm. The second she released, he let his go too. They rose out their highs together and he enjoyed the sight of her as much as he thought he would.

When they were both done, Sweet Pea barely kept himself up, his arms shaking. He pushed up, taking off the condom and disposing of it. He then joined her in his bed again, pulling her against him and kissing her forehead. He reached over, turning the lights up as she sluggishly pulled the blankets over them, exhaustion clear on her face. They fell asleep fast, tangled together with the smell of freshly had sex still in their noses.

I know a girl, she's like a curse... We want each other, no one will break first. So many nights, trying to find someone new. They don't mean nothing compared to you.

When she woke up again, it was like every time she'd imagined it. He was asleep, his face relaxed and looking younger than when he was awake and a million worries aged him. He looked so good, his hair fluffy and messy and soft. The sunlight filtered through the curtains, making his skin practically glow, and she smiled.

She was insanely in love with this boy.

Wow.

She thought about getting out of bed and making him breakfast, but she'd rather die then having him wake up and the magic of the night and the morning be at all tainted by panic when he saw she wasn't there. So she stayed, playing with his hair as she looked out the window, thinking.

He woke up to the smell of her and the feel of her body against his and her hands in his hair. He opened his eyes, looking up at her. He smiled as the night before all coming back. And she wasn't gone. She hadn't left!

Before she could even think, words were slipping out of her mouth. "I love you."

Taken off guard, Sweet Pea grinned. She had been the first one to say it. Oh my gosh! "I love you too," he rasped, his mornings voice croaky and deep and unused while she'd been awake for a while. They exchanged a kiss, sealing the words with an unspoken promise.

From here on, as long as the world would allow it.

Neither of them intended to break that promise either. It was solid. Forever. It was all they had and all they needed and it would always be between them.