Bad Sad and Mad by BIBI

Pierrot By by Le Sserafim 

Pierrot is Smiling at us by Kim Wan Sun

Well now I'm here, locked up, but thankfully I'm not in Misa's state. Not only forced to stand 24 hours everyday for about 52 days, but also having eyes covered and forced to answer questions. 

At least I get Light's same state, in a cell, with an ominous yellow light, a toilet, a cot, a sink and a mirror. 

I just laid on my cot, as if waiting for a rectangle platform with dishes to pass above me, the light isn't red though, so I guess it's a good thing that I'm not being trialed for this kinda stuff. 

Yes I'm talking about the Spanish, psychological horror movie called "The Platform" (or "El Hoyo" which means "The Hole")

After that I've never wanted to throw up my food so badly while watching the film. The difference between the film and this, is that I'm glad that: There is not rectangle hole where I might fall from. There is no old man to tie me up and eat my skin when we're at a shitty level of this hell hole. I stay here and not move to a lower or higher level. There is no red light only yellow back room ahh light.

I better stop yapping bro, I'm speaking too much. Send help bro.

The point is, I'm locked up. 

And instead of a long black t shirt matched with black pants like Light 

I literally got a white t shirt and shorts that don't even feel like shorts because they reach below the knee for some odd reason. Also white. 

Why do I feel like Young Sook?

That one psycho girl from 2020 film "The Call"

But she's also similar to Light...

Psychopathic...

Good guys until not...

Hot...

Scary...

And extremely...evil...

I only look like her because I'm wearing the exact same thing as her when she was locked up in her house with her step mom. 

It's always gotta be the step mom. Kinda irks me imma be real. 

Why the fuck do I keep yapping bro? I'm sorry Cuh. Maybe because I'm bored and having an inner monologue when there's nothing happening with me.

Since I'm boring as hell, and I have nothing going for me. 

I tend to sneak into the corner and with paper I sneaked in I drew random things. 

I just sat there. Thinking about anything close to mildly entertaining. 

Music

My current boyfriend(?) 

And how he felt inside me-

And anything else. 

I slightly rubbed my thighs together. Dawg I cannot risk getting caught being horny. 

No way Jose. 

I laid on my cot, making direct eye contact with the camera.

Garam: 씨발야!!!! I'm fucking bored!

L: I'm sorry, you have to be confined for a test...

Garam: I fucking hate Kira. And if I worked for him I would've been dead because I would been killed off by saying "no"!!!

I stood there, tears pricking my eyes. I've been through rough Idol training, but this majorly feels much worse, why am i here???

I held it in...just try-

I broke down crying, I feel so hopeless in here. It's all hopeless. 

I just wanted to protect my two friends...Minji Kim and Arianna Yang. And I feel like I even failed that.

I'm so sorry girls...I failed you guys...

I leaned against the wall, feeling like an odd failure.

But then again. People got worse lives than me no? People literally dying and shit like that. And to think I have to be here for 52 days...

My back was against the wall and I slid down to the floor.

I know I should be stronger, but I haven't mentally prepped myself for something like this. And this came quicker than expected. 

So go ahead and call me "Crybaby" but I have my own reasons. So listen up.

But for some reason, the nickname loops in my head...

"Crybaby", "Crybaby", "Crybaby", "Crybaby", "Crybaby"...

Is this truly me know?

Sorry this started light hearted but I can barely hold on. And I'm exhausted. I just need my friends. So looked up at the camera and asked,

Garam: Can I call a friend? I'll even allow you to listen to everything I'm saying...

The other line was silent for a second before he responded, the robotic and disturbing voice filling up my cell.

L: Only for 5 minutes. Once a week, 5 minutes.

I sighed in relief, thank you Beyonce! Though...I will admit I didn't expect him to say yes. Though I gotta be grateful he did. 

Thank you Beyonce!

I grabbed the phone provided for me and mindlessly punched in Minji's number.

And waited...

Minji: HOE WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU?!

Garam: Sorry...investigation...

Minji: For what?

Garam: I was suspected of doing something worse than drugs but better than a sexual crime...

Ari: We're you accused of being Kira?

Garam: Yeah, but after this I may not mentally recover- IS THAT ARI?!

Ari: Yeah that's me...

Garam: I FUCKING MISSED YOU!!!!!!!!!

Minji: Hey! What about me?!

Garam: Dumb ass, I miss you too 👹👹

Minji: Thank you mwah. 

Ari: So what happened?

Garam: I'm under investigation. Like L has better things to do. He has "Brother's Home" in South Korea!

Ari: Oh...holy shit. Well, does he have any evidence against you?

Garam: His words? "Youre under arrest and investigated because your old clothes were discarded when you went out to meet Kira near Osaka with the Second one", like pfft? How much do yall wanna bet that both Kiras are old men who aren't chronically online???

Minji: ㅋㅋ, like 50 won.

Garam: Well I gotta go. I have a time limit

Minji: I hope you get it soon

Ari: Same, I miss you so much.

Garam: Aw baby :(

I then hung up and gave the phone back to Matsuda.

Garam: Thank you sir...

Matsuda: No problem.

He gently but awkwardly smiled and he walked away. 

Glad i got someone on my side when I'm alone in this cell...

1058 words

Fun fact: Brother's Home is where people were kidnapped and forced to play children's games or they died. Which inspired most of Squid Game.