basically just incorrect quotes from this cute ass instagram account-
sorry this ones short a H-
enjoy jully 🥺
LAURENS207

***

Alex: *twirls around*
Alex: *takes a selfie*
Alex: *poses in the mirror*
John: You seem confident today-
Alex: I did a verY expensive face mask this morning-

***

John: I should get Alex a surprise-
Website: Flowers (9.99), Chocolates (5.99), Foam Shooter (24.99)
[later]
John, hiding behind a wall with a nerd gun: Oh he'll be surprised alright-

***

Alex: I just cleaned the w H o L e kitchen! :D
John: Perfect! I was just about to make a sandwich-
John: *slices bread, a crumb falls on the counter*
Alex. 👁💧👄💧👁

***

John: What does your fortune cookie say-
Alex: It sayS-
Alex: "Your husband will love you forever and will give you a back rub every night"-
John: Is that was it really says-
Alex: ye
John: Let me seE-
Alex: no

***

John: You doing okay?
Alex: UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH-
John: Same-

***

[2am]

Alex: John? John wake up-
Alex: Wanna bake bread tomorrow-
John: *stirs a bit* Go back to sleep doll-
Alex: *too excited for bread*

***

John: Hey you're back! Oh what's wrong?
Alex: *sobbing* S-Someone...
John: Did someone hurt you? Was someone mean to you?
Alex: *sniffs* S-Someone honked at mE-

***

John: I know you're mad. Just know that I love you very much-
John: *hugs angry Alex who's wrapped in a blanket*
John: *walks away*
Alex: M O R E

***

Alex: *can't reach the top shelf*
Alex: John-
Alex: *can't reach to change a lightbulb*
Alex: Joh n-
Alex: *can't paint the top of a wall*
Alex: J o h N-
Alex: *can't reach plant to water it*
Alex: J O H N-
John: *turns on fan*
Alex: What would I do without you-

***

Alex: Ah yes, the whole house is cleaned and organized-
John, opening the Junk Drawer of Shame ™: Wbat about this dra-
Alex: *runs over and slaMs it shut* wE DONT TALK ABOUT THIS DRAWER-

***

Ghost: boo
John: *turns around* Ha, veRy original babe-
Alex: *walks in* Hey! Ready?
John: *looks back at ghost, sweating nervously*

***

Alex: *takes cookies out of oven*
Alex: *puts cookies on counter*
Alex: *goes back to turn oven off*
Cookies: *gone*
John: 👁👅👁🍪

***

John: *looks out window* Oh no it's raining-
John: We'll hav to cancel our plans-
Alex: Oh no-
Alex and John: *changing into comfy clothes* Oh no-
Alex: *getting a blanket* Oh no-
Alex: *snuggling with John* Oh no-

***

Alex: John what do you think-
John: I think it's crazy how something can seem so important at the time but when you look back it seems so minor-
Alex:
Alex: I meant my glasses-

***

John: *walking in the snow*
Alex: *walking in John's footsteps*
John: fOOTPRINT STEALER-

***

Alex and John: *quietly vibing*
Alex, out of nowhere: h A-
Alex: I jusT got your joke!
John: From yesterday?
John: It took you thiS long??
Alex: ye

***

Alex: *wants a chip*
Alex: *looks in chip bag, sees it's empty*
Alex: *looks over at John*
John: 💧👁👁

***