This is going to be a very messy, confusing ramble but a ramble nonetheless. 

So I've been feeling weirdly down lately, and I know what triggered it, which was a boy problem but I haven't been thinking about it and it's not even a problem anymore. So then I thought I could you know start feeling better but then there's like more shit that keeps happening that's just bombarding me and not letting me get better.

It's a weird feeling and I don't know how to describe it. The things that usually make me happy and excited aren't really doing that at the moment. Like Harry, seeing all the pics from the tours and shit isn't getting me all happy and excited like it did weeks ago. The whole time during my exams I kept thinking about how much time I was gonna get to write for wattpad once they were over, and now it's summer and I've only updated once in the past like three weeks. I fucking hate that I have this kind of 'I can't be bothered', 'I don't really care', demotivated kind of feeling. Things that usually bother me, if you ask them about me now I'll just say I don't care, and knowing me that's weird because I care about EVERYTHING. 

My parents have been on my back lately about a lot of things, dumb things and important things, and they just keep spewing shit half of the time about me so that's not really helping me feel any better. I've vented to some friends about it but none of them have really given me any advice on what to do when I asked, or are even trying to make me feel better in general. Some just keep saying "it'll go away with time." So I guess I just need to wait it out?

Maybe I didn't explain to them how I really feel and pretended that things are still fine because they are but I feel down anyways? Idk. But that's the thing like I don't know how to explain why I feel down, there's the whole thing with my parents but that shit happens on the daily for me so why am I suddenly feeling so weirdly down? 

I'm just very confused and demotivated. Like I don't even feel sad, it's just meh. Like unbothered and numb? I don't know why I'm feeling like this, but it's beginning to frustrate me. The summer has only just begun and it'll probably get better, but right now i feel shitty and I just wanna get excited about writing and summer again. 

If anyone has any advice please let me know by commenting, if not then that's all right, at least I got to ramble :)

THAT'S ALL FOLKS