.seventy seven.

-

"Based on the tests I have run on his majesty's wife, there is enough evidence to conclude that..."

-

Eun and Minji continued trying to get pregnant to no avail, and it seemed to become Minji's obsession at a certain point. She felt incomplete if they didn't have their dream family, and that included their four children. She also, in that time, tried very hard to make Eun warm up to Jinki. It was very important to her because Eun loved and spent time with the other children. But Jinki only received love from her. Of course, his aunts and uncles, as well as his grandparents, showered him with love and gifts. But it just wasn't the same to only get love from one parent. Eun's mother had talked to him about it many times, but he just couldn't bring himself to warm up to the child.  

Minji stayed in with the children after breakfast, and Eun had gone out for his morning jog with Han. Soon Deok had arrived with her husband and their daughter. She placed the toddler on her feet and she stumbled over to her cousins who were playing with wooden blocks in the living room. Hei Ran was most attached to Jinki instead of her older cousins, which Minji thought was a good thing. She knew the twins loved Jinki, he was their baby brother, but sometimes she felt like Eun's resentment towards him rubbed off on the twins. Sometimes, they didn't want to play with their infant brother and he'd return to his mother's side with watery eyes. Hei Ran was different. She didn't have anyone to play with at home, so whenever they visited, she was happy to play with Jinki.

Jinki was also infinitely attached to her. For the most part, only she or Minji could make him happy when he was crying. 

Soon Deok sat in the living room with her sister and one of the maids went to brew them some tea. The older of the two sisters had already accepted the fact that her sister and Eun were married. She had also accepted that she had married Han, and that one didn't always get what they wanted. Though she wasn't in love with the eleventh prince, she was comfortable with him, and she cared about him. It was the reason why she had finally opened up to starting a family with him. 

With the two boys gone from the house, and the children playing happily nearby, the two sisters started to have a conversation. Soon Deok had news for her younger sister, and a warm smile formed on her lips as she began to speak. "I know you and Eun oppa have been trying for another baby, so I was reluctant to come over and tell you the news..." She trailed off softly, and she averted her sister's face. Minji had voiced her worries to her sister. How the doctor had informed that she was capable of having children, but her body was refusing to get pregnant because she was still weak from her pregnancy with Jinki. He had been born almost two years prior, yet she could not get pregnant again. The doctor had informed her that if she got pregnant again, it would be a miracle.

She had informed her older sister that she feared her husband would be unhappy with her if she could not give him another child. It was their dream. Soon Deok encouraged her by telling her to keep trying and by taking care of herself.

Minji already knew what her sister was going to say before she even got the words out. It was obvious, since she had talked about being reluctant to tell her about it. Soon Deok bit down on her lip and then finally decided to speak after a few moments of staying silent. "Han and I decided that it was time for Hei Ran to have a new sibling." Her hands moved to touch her belly subconsciously. 

They had more likely just found out about the news because she wasn't showing yet, and Minji smiled against the prick in her chest. Of course she was happy for her sister, she really was. But she could not prevent the jealousy from entering her heart. She and Eun had been trying for a while, yet they could not have another baby. Soon Deok and Han had just recently decided to try for their second child and she was already pregnant. She couldn't help it as the tears formed in her eyes.

Soon Deok felt her heart sink as she saw the sadness in her sister's eyes. 

"Please don't be sad." She reached for Minji's hand in hers. "I only wanted to share my happiness with you because you're my sister and I love you."

Minji quickly gave a shake of her head, and gave her sister's hand a squeeze of reassurance. "I don't want you to think I'm not happy for you. I'm happy for you, I'm smiling for you. I'm just crying because of my own selfish worries and I'm so sorry."

As her older sister, Soon Deok tried to encourage her and make her feel better about her predicament. "Please don't apologize. You and Eun oppa will get there if you just keep trying--"

But Minji stopped her with another shake of her head. "Lets not talk about that now. My husband and I had our moment of bliss, and you were there to support us through all of it, despite your feelings. Its your time now. Lets just be happy for you and your husband. We should let the rest of the family know immediately." Though Minji and her sister had never talked about it again after Minji and Eun got married, the younger knew that her sister was in love with Eun. Minji wasn't entirely sure if Soon Deok still harbored feelings for Eun, but she was grateful that her sister respected her relationship, and she did so because she loved her. It was an entirely different case from Jangmi, who had no problem breaking up their marriage if it meant she could have the tenth prince.

The smile returned to Soon Deok's face. "Thank you for understanding, and for sharing my happiness."

-

Five months later, Soon Deok was already seven months along and showing heavily. Minji and Eun had still been trying to have another child, and her doctor had advised them to stop trying, if anything for Minji's own sanity. She spent every time getting her hopes up and then crying when it didn't end up happening. Eun was always there to comfort her and assure her that they could always try again, but it was getting emotionally exhausting for both of them. Eun hated the way she would beat herself up over it. She always blamed herself and apologized to him for not being able to bear him another child. This in turn made the resentment towards Jinki come back and become greater. Eun blamed it all on Jinki because he had made Minji's body weak. He had just been a leech who sucked out all her health. Now she couldn't have children, as hard as they tried.

It was on Han's twentieth birthday, after the party at his house, that Minji had sat in bed beside her husband and heaved a tired sigh. "Eun," She called his name softly, barely audible in the room. He had been changing out of his gown and putting on his sleeping robe. On this night, they had dismissed the maids early, since they were going to be at the party and would probably get home late. the couple had put the children to bed themselves before they went to their bedroom to rest for the night. He turned towards her and cut the distance between them, kissing her on the lips as he got into bed beside her. She continued, "Love, all of this has been so upsetting and exhausting. It has been for you too, I can feel it, and I can tell that you do it for me. To make me happy."

"What's going on?" He wondered in confusion.

Minji continued to explain. "Its getting to be very clear that I'll most likely never give you another child, and I'm sorry for that. But I just can't handle another disappointment."

Her husband quickly cupped his face in her hands and gave a fast shake of his head. Each time she was upset, it made him upset because she was his happiness. She was his whole reason for living and she knew it. "Don't ever apologize for something that isn't your fault."

"Either way," She insisted, face full of defeat. "I want to give this one last try. Then we can finally have closure and give up knowing we did everything we could."

Eun agreed with a nod. "We will do whatever you want."

The two gave it one last try, one final attempt at getting pregnant, and then had to wait for some time to pass for them to find out if it had worked. Two months later and with Soon Deok close to giving birth, Minji started to feel a familiar morning sickness once more. She didn't get her hopes up this time, but had Eun send for their doctor to confirm or debunk her suspicions. 

The doctor came in, warning her that it might just be another false alarm, and that she shouldn't get her hopes up. But she already knew that and urged him to get on with his tests. It had been two months since her and Eun's final attempt. She and her husband still got intimate, but they weren't trying or weren't worried about anything other than enjoying each other's company. Of the late, Minji had been so obsessed with becoming pregnant, that she hardly paid any attention to anything else. Now, she made sure to enjoy the feeling of herself protectively in her husband's arms. 

The same tests were performed and the doctor consulted his notes for a good ten minutes to ensure that there was not a doubt in his mind. When he returned to the room to give them the news, both Eun and Minji sat side by side with hopeful eyes. It had been over two years since they had a child and they only wanted one more to complete their dream family. That was all they wanted. Minji also wanted to prove to herself that she was useful. She could not see, but she could at least provide her husband with heirs. Eun just wanted to prove to her that none of this was her fault.

As he returned to the bedroom, the doctor cleared his throat before he started to speak. "Based on the tests I have run on his majesty's wife, there is enough evidence to conclude that..." Minji felt herself lean closer into her husband's embrace, prepared for whatever news may come. "She will bear you another child. Congratulations your majesty. I will once again prescribe some vitamins, and I will be coming by periodically to check the progress." He smiled at the young couple--him almost twenty two and her nearly nineteen. They were too young to be worrying about such things like not being able to have children. Yet he had been their doctor for years and he thought that no one deserved that blessing more than them. They loved each other and truly wanted four children in their family.

Eun jumped up from his spot at the bed and lifted her up in his arms happily. "Did you hear that, jagi?" He asked her.

Minji couldn't help the smile that tugged at the corners of her mouth. She nodded her head frantically. "I did, love." There were even happy tears pricking at her eyes.

It was one of the four happiest moments of her life. The first, though it didn't feel that way at the moment, was when she married Eun. The second was when the twins were born. The third was when Jinki was born and survived despite all odds. Now the fourth was finding out she was having a fourth child, when it was thought that she would never be able to get pregnant again. Her life in Goryeo had been filled with many misfortunes. But there were always good things that came of those misfortunes. Minji just knew she could attribute all of her current happiness to her husband Eun.

-

author's note will be very short again tonight because i have to go to sleep.

i have to get up for work in about five hours tomorrow. but i wanted to have this update up before going to sleep. thank you all so much for reading and supporting me and my stories. 

it means the entire world to me.

stay tuned for the final amounts of drama which will take place in the next twenty three chapters. there will be 100 chapters in goryeo, and then i will start a new book, which will be he sequel to this. i also will be posting in han and soon deok's story.

almost at the end, i can't believe it, after almost three years.

-clary