The hot water soothed her muscles. Whenever needed she could dip her head under and it would wash away the tears though she preferred to bite them away. There had been enough crying and it never had solved anything. The fact both Rose and Steffen had witnessed her break down was something she hoped would not happen again. The fact she had been lying down on the couch, her head in Rose’s lap with the latter caressing her soothingly was also something that she hoped would not happen again. Though admittedly, it had felt good to let it all go. 

As Azura dipped her head underwater in the tub again she couldn’t help but wonder if Lucas was thinking about her as he was on her mind all the time. Submerged, everything seemed to make much more sense. Lucas had been right, they needed a break no matter how bad it hurt. He was back, she had accomplished that, and that was what mattered. He was no longer ‘gone’ and she knew he still cared for her. Well, she hoped as his reaction after seeing the news had not been so friendly.

Rose and Steffen knew as well. Azura had decided it was better to tell them straight up instead of them hearing it from Jeff or Lucas. She had asked the couple not to judge and not voice their opinions but just to hear her out. They had done just that after which she had had not been able to stop talking and tossed all concerns and worries about Lucas out there too resulting in the embarrassing crying session. 

“Can I come in?”  Azura came back up for air, wiping the water from her eyes, and stared at Rose. 

“Did I understand right that you asked if you could come in while you’re already inside?! I’m naked, woman!” She gestured to herself, splashing some foam around.

“Nothing I ain’t seen before.” The small woman retorted.

“Yes, there’s stuff you ain’t seen before! What the hell are you doing here?”

Rose shrugged. “Just checking if you are okay.”

“You mean, checking to see if I didn’t drown myself.” Azura sighed and leaned back again, ignoring the water which spilled over the edge. 

“Well, no... Yes... Maybe? Well you know, you guys did sorta break up.” She toyed with the hem of her shirt. ”I just want to help.”

“If you want to help, Rose, you grab the vodka and the ice cream, and kick Steffen out of the house. Not barge into the bathroom while I’m taking a bath and try to straighten my thoughts. And we didn’t break up, we’re just on a break.”

Rose hummed softly before answering. “Done, done, and done. The dude is out for the night.” She paused as she grabbed a towel from the rack. “And you know there’s no such thing as a ‘break’ right? That’s just a shitty excuse people use if they can’t accept an end of a relationship.”

Azura paled and her stomach turned itself into a big knot. 

“Shit… I didn’t mean it like that! I wasn’t there when it happened... I just assumed-”

“You assumed wrong!” Azura could not unsee the flinch in her friend’s stand as she lunged to the edge of the bath. Taking a few deep breaths to calm herself she relaxed again. “Just hand me the towel. I’ll be down in a few minutes.”

The blonde did as instructed and turned her back as Azura got up from the water. “I’ll pour some vodka.” Rose spoke before exiting.

When the blue-eyed female emerged from the bathroom and entered the living room she found Rose had done just as she said she would. On the side table stood a tall glass half full with a clear liquid and a vodka bottle next to it. She couldn’t help but grin a little at the sight of it. Tipping her imaginary hat at Rose, fingers curled around the glass and as she sat herself down, she gulped down half of it in one go. Closing her eyes as the strong alcoholic substance burned her throat she did not notice her friend had gotten up to open the front door. When she opened the again two women stood before her. While Rose had short blonde hair which sometimes had a reddish glow, the other woman had more of a sandy blonde color and her hair was much longer. It was tied together behind her head in a loose bun while in the front long bangs hung freely around the heart-shaped face. 

Nina truly was a classic beauty with her own twist. She did not need make-up or anything artificial to stand out and yet she came across as a very genuine and sweet person. Azura took another sip of her drink as she observed the newcomer. Having seen her just a few times, none of those had been very long. In fact, Azura could not remember if she had actually spoken to her before. It surprised her to see her here as she had no idea Rose and her were friends. 

“Do you mind if Nina joins us?” Rose asked. “She knows about most of the stuff. Sheila and I told her after witnessing your first encounter with Lucas chasing you.”

Azura contemplated the request as she observed the human female before her. The woman had turned Lucas down after seeing them together for just a small moment; seeing the obvious to which they had both been blind to till not much later. Azura could only imagine how it must have hurt to make a choice like that and she was grateful Nina had done so. Sensing no malicious intent from Lucas’s almost ex, she nodded and grabbed the vodka bottle to fill up her glass again.

“Fine. Just one rule for tonight. No mentioning him by the name or talking about him at all. I want to forget, have fun, and just be carefree for just one night.” 

“I can do that,” Nina replied. “How about some zombie movies? Zombieland never gets old!” 

Rose hummed in approval as she grabbed some more drinks for Nina and herself. Azura cracked a small smile herself as the vodka started doing its work.

She had no idea how many glasses she had but the alcohol numbed the pain and eased the tongue. The movie was long finished and the three women were huddled together under one blanket giggling like high school girls. At first, the idea was to watch the second Zombieland movie but that plan had failed as they started talking. Innocent topics at first, but the more alcohol was consumed, the lower their topics went. 

"My first time was not too bad," Nina admitted while swirling her white wine in the glass. "I did not know he was nine years older than me at the time, and he did not know I was a virgin till after the sex."

"He did not know it was your first time?!" Rose exclaimed loudly. 

"Nope! And I did not want him to know either since I knew he would stop. Even though we were not in a relationship, he had his morals. And he was a gentleman. He made sure I was comfortable the whole time and I didn't even bleed the first time. Second time…  yeah I did bleed then, but we were a bit rougher and that's when I told him I had been a virgin."

Azura just hummed in response as her own first time replayed itself in her head. She had been sixteen and with her first boyfriend who was two years older. It had been clumsy, a tad painful, and above all... Lasted a real short time. Things had not really improved as he had no idea how to please a girl and she had been too shy to talk to him about it. The whole relationship was just off as it was a way of rebelling against her foster parents. Around that time she had also started drinking and a year later their group of 'friends' had discovered drugs. It wasn't until her boyfriend wanted her to join him on a robbery of a liquor store that she had broken things off. 

"But you guys never had a relationship?” Rose continued.

“No. Not a love relationship anyway. We were friends with benefits for a while and had some good fun. What about you?”

“Puppy, puppy, puppy love!” Rose chanted, making both women snort. “Heavenly, naive, and a whole lot of weirdness!”

“I expected nothing less from you!” Azura snorted. She took another sip of her vodka and glanced at the bottle which was almost empty.

The alcohol was doing its job alright. if she closed her eyes and leaned back, it felt like the world was spinning and her stomach was doing rounds the other way. She knew if she were to stand up now, it would not go well at all. Nina had needed a whole let less alcohol. Being human, her body reacted in a different way and needed more time to get rid of the numbing substance. Azura knew that if she would stop drinking, the worst would be gone within an hour, but she would suffer from a hangover the next day just as she had done when she had been drinking the first time with Lucas. 

Feeling a tug at the blanket, Azura turned towards Nina but found the blonde not next to her but on her back on the floor. Caught between couch and side table, her arms and legs were sticking up and flailing around helplessly. Caught by an unstoppable laughing fit, the blonde on her other side almost ended on the floor herself. The blue-eyed woman reached out to the human and helped pull her up to a sitting position.

“Oh my God, thank you!” Nina breathed while pushing herself up to her own two feet. She swayed a little, absently staring at the ceiling. “I think I’m gonna be sick…” 

That seemed to break Rose out of her fit of laughter. “You better make it to the toilet! I’m not cleaning up after you.” She shooed Nina away but the woman did not need any encouragement to run as fast as her drunken body would. 

“Who’s going after her?” Azura hoped Rose would do that as she wasn’t sure what would happen if she were to get up. 

Rose had a substantially less amount of alcohol in her system as she only had beers to drink. They locked eyes, narrowing their eyes as a small stare-off was taking place until the short woman averted her gaze and sighed. 

“Fine. My house, my guest, I’ll check on her.” She got up with a loud groan and shuffled after Nina. 

Azura exhaled sharply and let her head fall back against the couch. Without the distraction of the other two, her mind automatically started drifting back to the gaping hole in her heart. He had managed to wedge himself into there and he had left her bleeding when he was ripped away. It had barely begun to heal when he pulled out himself this time. Part of her knew he was hurting too, and Steffen probably was at his place right now. The men most likely doing the same thing she was doing. Getting drunk to numb the pain. And yet now that she was alone, it hit her harder than it had before. 

Needing to feel a bit of warmth and homeliness, she reached out to the Phoenix inside her. Its flames had always been a strange sense of comfort while they used to terrify her at the same time. Now they embraced her, lulled her into a state between being conscious and completely out of it. Imagining the mark the flaming bird had left on Lucas, it was her only connection to him but she could not feel or reach out to him. It was more a mental connection, for her to know they were still connected. And yet it was a painful reminder that he was part of this too, and whatever the outcome would be, she would need him.

As the tears pricked behind her eyes, the Phoenix engulfed her in its warmth. Not only was it taking away some pain, it seemed to clear her mind and body from the alcohol too. It could take away more pain. Azura pushed more knowing the mythic creature residing within could take away all the hurt but she could feel its refusal. Frustrated, she lashed out at the flames but they coiled around her fighting mind and pushed her into submission. They bound her, stopping her from pushing but allowed for her to pull back.

A buzzing in her jeans startled her, making her pull back from the confines of her mind and back into the here and now. Blinking a few times, Azura grabbed the phone from her pocket, surprised someone was messaging her past midnight. She caught a glimpse of red flakes in her blue eyes reflecting on the screen. She had no idea for how long she was zoned out but neither Nina nor Rose had returned Turning her attention back to her phone she opened the messages from Killian.

Hey sis, 

Sorry for the midnight messages. I hope you’re ok and that Lucas is doing well too. Haven’t heard from you since you left so I hope things got settled and everything is working out. I know that you’re busy with other stuff but I do want to ask you for your help. Things are hectic here and I could use some help with reorganizing things around here. Also, I want your insights on the research done here. Marric was working on some messed-up stuff but doing so uncovered a lot of interesting things. 

Let me know!

The buzz which had been cleared a bit by the Phoenix seemed to evaporate completely by Killian’s message. In normal circumstances, she would decline. In normal circumstances, she would be planning and focusing on taking down whatever threat was coming. In normal circumstances... 

There were no normal circumstances. Nothing about her life and what was going to happen was normal. One thing was a fact though, right now, being here would prevent her from focusing on what was important. They were too close, she could not avoid Lucas. He was safe, he was back to himself mostly… Maybe some distance would do them some good. She replied with only three words.

I’ll be there.