"A Kakuja? Are you for real?"

Hide nodded.

He felt sick.

Like, blow chunks all over the wall sick.

Taking a deep breath, he clenched his hands and looked back up at Touka, who was seated across from him with a look of horror on her face.

"Yeah. The Investigators are thinking he'll have a fully developed Kakuja in about a month, based on the rate he's cannibalising."

There was a bout of silence before Touka growled in frustration and slammed her fist into the table.

"Dammit! Why is he doing this?! What does he think this'll prove?! Why does he always have to do this self sacrificial bullshit?!"

Hide lowered his gaze grimly.

"If I know anything about Kaneki, and I do, he's always been like this. He's always just suffered in silence so he wouldn't feel like he was a burden to anybody. It's not my place to tell you why, but given the circumstances it makes sense."

Touka furrowed her eyebrows in confusion.

"How does it make sense?"

Hide took a deep breath before responding.

"He went through something traumatic. Hell, maybe traumatic is putting it lightly. PTSD is hard to talk about even with the most open people, and for someone like Kaneki who keeps everything bottled up and let's his emotions fester, I'd think he probably wouldn't even be able to get a word out before breaking down. Of course he'd run away to somewhere he would think he wasn't burdening you all with his problems. Sure it might seem dumb to some people, but it's how he copes, even if it's not all that healthy."

Touka looked regretful, a shine coming to her eyes as she looked down at her clenched hands.

"It's stupid." She muttered weakly, regretfully.

Hide lowered his gaze back to his hands.

"I just... want to help him. I don't want him to lose himself more than he already has."

Hide clenched his fists tightly, nails digging into the palms of his hands so sharply that he was leaving little crescent shapes.

"I don't want to lose him at all."

Touka stared at him for a few moments, her purple eyes thinly shining with tears she was refusing to shed, then she chuckled half heartedly, shook her head, and gave him a melancholic smile.

"Ok, I'll help."

She stood from the table, walking over to his side and holding out a hand.

"You're human, can't have you dying on me while we're trying to save that dummy."

Hide blinked up at her before standing up, taking her hand in his own and giving it a firm shake.

"Thank you, Kirishima."

Touka shook her head.

"Just Touka's fine."

Hide let out a breathy laugh, a small grin coming to his face.

"Right. Thank you, Touka."

She nodded.

"No problem, Hide."

~~~

Hide stood at his bathroom sink, letting water drip from his face and into the ceramic bowl as he stared down at the counter, his hands gripping tight against it.

It had been a few days since Touka had agreed to help him find Kaneki, but despite her knowledge about Ghoul hideouts, especially Aogiri Tree's for reasons she wouldn't disclose, they couldn't find anything on Kaneki. It was like he had completely disappeared.

His sightings haven't been very much help, either, as they're very scattered and inconsistent. It was like walking through a never ending corn maze.

Sighing, Hide grabbed a small towel he had set beside himself on the counter and used it to dry his face, tossing it over his shoulder when he was done and grabbing his phone right as it went off with a notification.

His eyes widened when it was a text from Touka.

Touka:
I think I might've found something. Meet me outside of Anteiku around midnight.

Glancing at the time in his found, Hide sighed with a bit of relief when he saw that it was only 10:30. He had a bit of time to prepare.

Apparently not enough time, though, because Hide was kind of freaking out as he made his way to Anteiku in the dead of night.

Luckily for him, the bright light that hung above the entrance staircase to the coffee shop was on, and he quickly spotted a familiar purple haired figure.

Touka turned to him as he approached her, wrapped in a heavy green cargo jacket that practically swallowed her, along with a pair of black leggings under a pair of black shorts.

"You look comfy." Hide commented.

Touka rose a brow at him.

"It's the middle of the night, you ass. I'm not gonna get all pretty just to relay information. Besides, half this shit I found on my bedroom floor."

Hide shrugged.

"Hey, I can't judge. I dug these out of the laundry basket."

He gestured to the light blue hoodie he was wearing, along with a pair of black sweat pants.

Touka rolled her eyes with a disgusted look on her face, as if she wasn't just as lazy in the clothes she grabbed.

"Gross. Anyway, you wanna hear it or not? You and I are exhausted and I can't be away from Hinami for too long."

Hide nodded.

"Yes. Spill it, sister."

Touka curled her lip before sighing exasperatedly, rolling her eyes again and shoving her hands into the pockets of her coat.

"I got information from a friend of mine in the 11th ward that he's been spotted there recently. Like, the last day or two recently. Word from my insider sources says that he usually stays in a ward a few days at a time to scope out prey. If we want to catch him, we have to be quick. Which means, we leave early tomorrow, and once we get there I can potentially track his scent."

Hide nodded.

"What do we do once we get him? I know Kaneki, he's not gonna listen to words only, especially if he's changed so much."

Touka shrugged.

"I don't know. But once we find him, you need to do whatever you can. Say anything, do anything, it doesn't matter, just get him home. And once we do that, we can go from there."

Hide sighed at their lackluster plan, but they didn't have any other option. There was no telling how Kaneki would react, or if he'd run away.

Nodding, Hide sighed again.

"We'll meet at Shinjuku Station at 7:00, alright? It should give us enough daylight to work with."

Touka nodded, reaching her foot out and kicking the toe of her shoe lightly with his.

"7:00 on the dot, got it? Or else I'll punch you."

Hide smiled softly at her, tapping his foot with hers in return.

"Got it."

Touka nodded again, although this time it seemed to be more towards herself, and she turned to walk back into Anteiku.

"See you." Was all she said before she walked up the concrete stairs, the distant jingle of the restaurants bell the only indication she made it inside.

Hide huffed out a small laugh before turning and making his way back to his own apartment.

~~~

Hide yawned once again as he and Touka boarded the train, which was unsurprisingly packed, given that it was 7:00 in the morning.

Both of them held onto the handrails above their heads, opting not to sit down since their stop wasn't too far away, and they needed to make a quick exit.

Hide stifled another yawn as small tears formed at the corners of his eyes, and he rubbed them in an attempt to get rid of some of the sleepiness.

Adjusting the backpack he was carrying over his shoulder, Hide turned to Touka.

"So, once we get to the 11'th ward, you'll be able to try and track his scent?" He whispered, low enough that only she could hear.

She nodded.

"Kaneki's scent is distinct, extremely distinct. To put it simply, he smells like a female Ghoul. He smells like Rize. Once I get in contact with my friend and can get some clues on his sightings, we can go from there."

Hide nodded.

"Alright. Got a plan for when we get there?"

Touka returned his nod.

"It's in the works, but I'll figure it out."

That gave Hide little hope, and he internally sighed, but he guessed that it made sense. After all, they didn't have much to go on regarding Kaneki's actual whereabouts.

They stopped talking after that, not wanting to risk anyone hearing them, and soon enough they felt the train slow to a stop.

"You have now arrived at Ota Station. Have a nice day!" Said an automated voice over the intercom of the train.

Both Hide and Touka let go of the handrails, quickly making their way out the door before anyone could crowd around them.

He brushed passed people who were entering the train as he was exiting, making sure to keep a hold of Touka's jacket sleeve as she guided him through the crowd of people.

They stopped as they exited the station completely, taking a look at the city around them.

"Well, ready to start looking?" Touka asked, letting her arm fall loosely to her side as Hide let go of her jacket.

He nodded, adjusting the backpack again and stuffing his hands into the pockets of his hoodie.

"Yeah. Let's go find him."

Guys, BSD has taken over my life. I'm trying not to make very subtle references in my fics. I might fail though, since Kaneki canonically likes Osamu Dazai.