Fire and Ice. Heaven and Hell. A rock and a hard place. You were certain that you'd be more comfortable in any of those situations compared to how you felt right now.

You had gotten things moving first thing in the morning. A second shower had helped wake you up, after your deliberately light sleep last night, and coffee was keeping you fueled for the day so far. Things had gone relatively smooth at the beginning of the day - you hadn't been able to avoid sharing breakfast with Doflamingo, since the casino itself wasn't open yet you couldn't use the excuse of work.

The mild discomfort of breakfast was nothing compared to the tension in the air when Crocodile arrived.

You had expected the tension between them to be akin to rival gang members, or a couple Mafia bosses trying to keep the peace between their families in the middle of a wedding. Something out of a movie that was oddly debonair and impressively smooth.

You had not expected that Doflamingo would flirt with Crocodile.

Doflamingo had met you in the morning with more flair than the day before, and you could see why Buggy got along with him. He was easily someone who was plenty flashy. His clothes were more casual, and he had been sporting the biggest, fluffiest, pinkest feather coat to possibly exist. You could hardly believe that this was the same person who had kept himself in check the day before. It was easy enough to ignore during breakfast, as he had kept his demeanor from the day before intact, but when he had greeted Sir Crocodile you had seen a complete shift in his behavior.

"Croco-baby!" Doflamingo's entire space had brightened.

You're sure your face had looked completely horrified, but you didn't see Crocodile even twitch. The distraction had given you a chance to compose yourself, at least and you did your best to keep your professional face intact.

"I'm delighted you agreed to this. I was surprised I didn't have the pleasure of your company when I arrived yesterday." Doflamingo was, as far as you can tell, laying it on thick specifically to get a rise out of your boss.

"I'm over-seeing several Rain Dinners branches, Doflamingo." Crocodile says in an impressively even and apathetic tone. "I hardly cared to make time to arrive today."

"Aww, you made time for me, I'm flattered. You have such capable people working for you Croco, you should let them shoulder more for you so you can relax properly. I can lend you the bed in my room to help you destress. Young Miss (Y/N) could run the auction in my place."

Doflamingo runs his tongue across his upper lip when he finishes speaking, making his implication clear. You're caught between not wanting to share Suwani, and the realization that you found the scenario hot and may you never accidentally admit as much.

"You're here to run the auction as the CEO of Smile, you can't pawn that off on my employees." Crocodile replies flatly.

The sarcasm, irritation, and random hints of innuendo were going to give you gray hairs. Salt in Buggy's coffee wasn't going to be enough to make up for all of this. Your job was, at its core, to keep people happy. The more important the guest, the more you provided to make sure their stay was as pleasant as possible. However, there was no way you could interject between the two of them right now. Never mind the fact that Crocodile was your boss' boss' boss, and the idea of him being defended by someone in your position was laughable, but also you were sure there were years of back history between these two. You simply didn't know enough to effectively intervene.

Doflamingo's arm drapes across your back and his hand lands on your shoulder so suddenly you flinch. It wasn't him or the action itself, it was the fact that you had expected to continue to be ignored, not practically yanked into the conversation.

"Tell him, Miss (Y/N), we've gone over the details of the auction enough you could handle it."

"Capable as I may be, Mr. Donquixote," you reply, recovering from your surprise quickly. "I'm not paid to do more than one job. I decline."

"Fufufu," the tone of his laugh wasn't something you had heard from him before, and there was a strange shift in air. A new weight settled on you, and you realize he's finally, truly, paying attention to you. "If it's a matter of compensation, Miss (Y/N)-."

"Hardly," you interject quickly, there's no way you're going to find out if he means to compensate you with his money or his time. "Being unofficially compensated is illegal, Mr. Donquixote. I decline."

There's a second of silence and then Doflamingo laughs. It's an impressive sound, but you're not thrilled to be hearing it, and from the flash of emotion on Crocodile's face, neither is he.

Doflamingo straightens up and removes his hand from your shoulder. You feel your body relax, even though you hadn't realized that you were tense to begin with. You curse inwardly, you're getting pulled around by a VIP instead of keeping him in line. Not that Doflamingo was your typical VIP, but you had years of experience at this job.

You pull your phone from your pocket to check the time as Doflamingo returns to bantering – or badgering - Crocodile. Despite the Warlord's words, you're not sure if he wants to sleep with Crocodile, so much as he wants to get into a fight with him. Though maybe for the Warlord there wasn't much difference between the two.

"My apologies for interrupting, but the Auction begins in an hour." You report when there's a breath of silence in which to do so. "Mr. Donquixote, you should head to the venue to finalize the item order and deal with any last-minute issues to ensure a smooth start."

"Capable indeed," Donquixote muses, and his tone sends a shiver up your spine that you're barely able to suppress. "Very well, let's get this amusement going, shall we Croco-baby?"

Crocodile grunts at Doflamingo, before turning toward you. "Miss (Y/N), send Buggy to the Auction Venue, and enjoy the rest of the day off."

You bow. "Yes, Sir Crocodile."

After you turn and leave you hear Doflamingo. "I'm still going to be here after the auction, why are you sending my little pet away? I was just starting to like her."

"I don't need you sending my capable employees running for the hills, you feathery bastard."

Crocodile's tone was steady, but the words still made you smile.

.
.
.
.
.

You enjoyed your time off Wednesday, and you informed Buggy before you had sent him to the auction venue that you were taking Thursday as well, and it was his fault. Doflamingo was too flashy and if Buggy didn't want salted coffee for the rest of his days, he wasn't going to argue with you.

Unsurprisingly you didn't hear anything from Crocodile on Wednesday. You expected that he had his hands full with Doflamingo, and afterward he probably wanted – and needed – nothing more than to sleep. You had only dealt with the muted version of the man for the most part, and exhaustion had sunk into your bones from it.

You woke up Thursday to a single text.

Suwani: I would like to treat you to more than just dinner, if you would permit me the honor of buying you a gift.

You: I'm texting you on a gift.

"You need only offer yourself, (Y/N), as you are, and I will grant your desires even if they are numerous as the sands."

The memory bubbled up, and for a moment you could feel his warmth wrapped around you, the low voice filled with desire and need sinking into your skin.

You: But... since my desires aren't as numerous as the sands, then I will do my best to accept yours.

It felt a bit like playing with fire to send such a text, but you were already well aware that you weren't going to be able to stem the tide of gifts that Suwani would want to provide for you. A man who had everything he could want – at least in a material sense – wasn't going to be concerned with silly little things like cost. Or frequency, for that matter.

Suwani: Then I won't hold back.

Suwani: I will be by at 1pm. You needn't worry about dressing for dinner. I hope you can forgive me for not being subtle, if only for today.

The second text came before you could think of any reply to the first.

Your head tilted and your face went a bit pink. You weren't sure what he was implying by saying you didn't need to dress for dinner.

You: ... Are you requesting I greet you naked at the door? Or are you telling me to dress casually?

There was a long pause before a text finally came through.

Suwani: Today is a gift for you, Miss Wednesday, not me. Dress casually.

"I mean, it would be a gift for me too," you muse, even as your face goes hot. You had been looking forward to having a full and actual date today, so you kept your musings to yourself.

You: I will be ready and casually dressed by 1.

You decide on a light lunch and get ready for the day. You wear loose slacks and a nice short sleeved shirt, and some decent shoes that could almost pass for dress shoes except the soles were more like sneakers than anything else. You're full of nervous energy and find that you're grateful you had slept in. Imagining sitting around like this since 7am instead of 10am was enough to almost knot your stomach.

When the doorbell rings you almost jump and have to swallow your heart before you open the door.

Sir Crocodile stands in the doorway and he is dressed to the nines. He's in a dark suit with a deep red ascot, and a white scarf hanging from his shoulders. His hair is slicked back save for one errant lock, and frankly you think it looks better a little messy than completely brushed back.

"I thought you said casual," you question despite the smile on your face. You're caught a bit off guard, but not displeased at all by the view.

"You'll be dressed to match, shortly." He assures you with a small smile. His hand that you hadn't even noticed was behind his back, comes into view with a bouquet of a dozen red roses. "A full and proper date begins with flowers."

"I... wow. I suppose it does." You take the bouquet carefully.

"Put them in your fridge for now, and they'll keep until you can put them into water. Or my secretary recommends hanging them upside down and letting them dry."

"The fridge for now, I guess." You murmur softly, leaning in and enjoying the scent of fresh roses. "Uh, give me a moment and I'll be ready to leave."

You place the roses into the fridge carefully, and gather your wallet, keys, and phone before stepping outside. Crocodile offers his arm, and you slip your own through it.

"Escorted from my door? The closet I had to something like this was prom, and there were six of us," you admit sheepishly.

"It's a shame to hear, but it's good to know such an honor is mine alone." He says smoothly, bringing your hand up to his lips for a soft kiss, and making your cheeks go red.

When you reach the ground floor and step outside you finally understand what he had meant when he had asked to be forgiven for not being subtle. An older classic car, complete with a chauffeur, was waiting at the end of the walkway. The tall, severe faced man, had a scar across his eye and muscles enough to probably lift the car and simply walk about town with it if he so desired.

"Miss (Y/N), please meet the punctual Mr. One."

The tall man's gaze shifts down to you and he bows ever so slightly. "It is a pleasure, Miss."

The interaction was enough for you to finally realize that, for the Warlord's people at least, you were the boss' girlfriend. Unlike someone like Doflamingo, who seemed to naturally have a different lady on his arm for each public appearance, Crocodile hadn't been seen in public with anyone on his arm. Until, perhaps, tonight.

"Ah, um, for me as well, Mr. One." You manage, the weight of several things kind of sinking into you all at once.

"Are you okay?" Crocodile asks, leaning down and squeezing your hand a little.

You smile. "Yes, I think there's just uh, an understanding dawning on me, is all."

"Oh?" He prompts, opening the door for you.

"I... I'm going on a date with a government-sanctioned gangster, and I don't even have a speeding ticket. It's a little surreal."

"Miss (Y/N), I hope that isn't how you think of me." There's a small look of concern on his face as you sit down in the back of the car.

"If it was, Suwani, I would've walked away at the café." You assure him.

He leans in with a smile, tilting your chin up and stealing a kiss before closing the door and walking around to the other side. Crocodile was seated behind the driver's seat, and you could feel the soft smile from the corner of your gaze. You couldn't look at him right now, despite all that you had done, you hadn't done anything publicly. Not that you think the stone-faced Mr. One qualified as the public, as he sat in the driver's seat managing to be both attentive to your needs - should you have any - and completely ignorant of your actions - should you want privacy.

You reach out with your left hand and slide your fingers across Crocodile's. The shift of his hand as he quietly twines his warm fingers with yours makes you blush harder, even if no one was looking. It was moments like these that made it difficult to see him as some crime-lord Warlord, or even as CEO/Owner of Rain Dinners.

You were, as the car pulled into a boutique that was so high end that it had a valet service, glad that you had chosen to eat a light lunch. Mr. One opened the door for Crocodile first, and then for you, though it was Crocodile who took your hand as you stepped out.

"I've never felt underdressed for a store before." You whisper, as you fold your arm in his.

"Soon you won't be underdressed for anything." He assures you.

It took everything you had not to hide behind Sir Crocodile as you entered the store. You were greeted by an employee who was dressed in a business suit, and that was probably the most casual item available in the whole store.

"Ah, Sir Crocodile, it is a pleasure to see you today." The employee greets him smoothly. "How may we serve you?"

"My companion and I have reservations at Baratie's this evening, and I wish to gift her a complete outfit to match." Crocodile says. "I believe preparations have been made?"

"Ah, yes! Mrs. Carter has been setting things up since yesterday. There are three young ladies in the back to assist, as we assumed it would be more comfortable that way." The employee says, smiling politely at you.

"More... comfortable?"

"They may need to assist you with getting dressed, but you will have privacy." Crocodile explains. "We have a few hours available in case there are tailoring adjustments to be made."

"It is our full service, Miss." The employee adds. "Your hair, nails, makeup, dress, shoes, and accessories will be provided. There are several options for you to choose from so you can select your preferences while still matching with Sir Crocodile."

You open and close your mouth a few times, unsure of what to say or how to act.

"Do you need a moment?" Crocodile asks softly.

"I... it's a bit much." You admit.

"It's hardly enough." He responds, a frown pulling at his lips.

"Is this restrained?"

"Barely, but yes. I had considered buying the shop."

"... Oh, please tell me you are joking." You lean against him, feigning feeling faint.

"Perhaps, a little." He says a small smile on his lips. "I could, but I knew such an act would be almost cruel. I considered simply buying you a dress and such, but this way you can choose what you like. To me, that was worth risking overwhelming you a little."

His words give your brain a chance to process what's going on and you can feel your face go pink. It was a huge gesture, from your perspective, but a compromise from his perspective. A compromise made specifically to benefit you, since he could have simply chosen for you.

"I... thank you." You say after a moment. "I feel like it falls short in the face of all this to simply say thank you, but... I, um... I accept it."

Crocodile leans down and kisses the top of your head. "Then it is I who will thank you. Try to relax and enjoy it."

"Will you be... uh, where will you be?"

"My plan was to wait in the cigar room, but if you prefer I join you-." His expression is part teasing, part legitimate offer.

"Ah, no, no. It's - that's fine." You interject. "I'll be back as soon as I can." You promise, unsure of just how much control you were actually going to have over how long the whole process would take.

A/N - Crocodile's car - I didn't get into the details of it in the story cause the reader in this story isn't into cars, so she doesn't know what it is. But you can know it's a (1959 or 1961) Rolls Royce Silver Cloud II