QUESTION:

Does 'secret women's business' extend to the animal world?

I ask. Having just been awakened again for the now-four-hourly feeding routine... by a cat who after spending eight solid months in the boys' company, turned to ME when it came to giving birth. She chose MY closet. She wakes ME, to feed her and let her out to do her business before rushing back to feed her kittens. She leaves them in MY care.

Is it instinctive?

It has happened with past female cats- same deal. My room, my help. Female to female.

Do they know?

Here's what she does when I am awake: She perches on the top of the three old leather suitcases (which I use as 'Dylan's side table' those times he plonks himself on that side of my bed, with a drink, his bean/rice chips and... whatever he has chosen to bring along to... fidget with) and makes a particular sound- staring at the door-handle. I dutifully get up and she follows me to the pattern of... opening a can/sachet, opening one of the back doors, scooping some out into her dish and then... leaving all doors open between her feeding area and her kids- no matter the hour.

When I am asleep, she perches on my pillow and rubs her face against mine- else uses her paw to 'pat me' awake. "Oi! Time to feed me so I can feed the kids!" That's what she's telling me.

The boys used to feed her and cuddle her. They are invisible to her now. There's just she, me and the kittens. I am both her maidservant and her 'trusted other'. When one of the kittens strays too far and loses contact with both her and its siblings... it emits a sound of distress. She gives a particular low "mrrr" sound in turn. I get up and I pick up the wayward child and return it to her. She stares up at me, smothered by wriggling bodies and she licks the kitten and... I sense her thanking me!

Sometimes, I see the panic in her eyes as she lies on my bed, facing the closet even when taking 'time out'. When strangers enter our home, or when an unusual sound reaches us from outside her eyes dart here and there, returning in between to where her kittens are secreted- and to me. It's reassurance she seeks those moments: that I will help her keep them safe.

She 'allows' the boys and the dog some contact- puts up with the pics and the vids and the stroking fingers and the wet sniffing nose.

But there are some moments she calls me. A different "mrrrrrr". I go to her and see her sprawled, each kitten at a teat and... then she stretches and there's this look of sheer contentment on her face as she stares up at me- I stare back in awe.

She is choosing to share her joy with me. She understands, I, too, am a mother. She gets the bond between us!

How the hell is this possible?

Cats, in particular, are opportunists. They don't give a damn whose hand holds the tin of food- long as a hand is there, with a tin, at the prescribed time. Nor who's available as a scratching post- any old hand/other body parts will do. They'll mate and use the opportunity to pass on their genes- with no further parental responsibility on the father's side. And they won't ever fetch your slippers, either. That's what dogs are for, duh.

Yet. When something as fundamental as the birth of new life is involved- mother cats instinctively turn to a female member of their 'court'. Secret women's business indeed. (I have no idea if this also applies to female dogs or other domesticated animals- would be intriguing to find out?)

Why have I even raised this question?

Well, in view of all this gender confusion... I came face to face with a fundamental fact: Nature, left alone, does its thing. Whether it be bringing two swans together who mate 'for life' or two cats together for a brief fling... nature always ensures the survival of each species. If left alone.

It's when we meddle with it; when we try to prove our supremacy over it that we get... discord. Confusion. Some terrible, devastating results. Else, total disregard of nature as a fundamental anything. 

We've turned birth into an industry; citing the importance of safety to both child and mother. Yet in the rest of creation, nature and the mating/birthing rituals continue undisturbed. Swans still mate for life and cats are still opportunists- including making full use of 'secret women's business'- secrets passed on through aeons. (There's probably - definitely - 'secret men's business' also. But it wouldn't be so secret if it got blabbed about- like now. Females suck at keeping secrets.)

It's Spring here. Seasonal flowers are in bloom. And our glorious, blazing flowering gums! There are scents in the air: sea breezes mixed with the blended offerings of these new blooms. There are five new lives thriving in my closet.

And there is awe- for nature.

What are your thoughts? Do some things such as the existence of 'secret women's business' transcend species when... nature is left alone?