QUESTION:

Does reverse discrimination negate the original discrimmination?

What do I mean?

There's a moral war been waged on our distant shores of late: Marriage equality. The gay community, fuelled by the 'cause-seeking' youth of today have been very... vocal on the matter.

"Good on them," I'd thought at the start, "It's healthy to question and to adjust laws as society evolves." (I applaud ANY stance against ANY oppression. In fact, I worry more about apathy than I do about anything else!)

But.

Here's where in this instance... they have lost me- or at least confused me enough to pause and think deeply about whether to vote "Yes" or "No" to the upcoming postal vote on whether we should vote for new marriage equality laws: (Yes, we do things in strange ways here... first we voted on whether to have this vote... which questions whether to have an actual vote- so potentially, three votes in total before we get to a definitive "Ye" or "Nuh".)

The ever-growing instances of reverse discrimination are so vehement and intense and so damn personally targeted however... I feel like I am the one being discriminated against- should I consider voting No. It's nonsensical! How does one accuse another of discrimination when they in turn discriminate with their very accusation?

I got a text message from some group or other yesterday, as did Dyls, urging us to "Do the right thing  and vote Yes". Privacy issues aside- it was yet another instance of feeling 'pressure' being applied. (Wondering too, if politicians will adopt this new specific, and very personal, 'targeting' in upcoming elections...)

Signs are everywhere: Vote "Yes", and show your support. Vote "Yes" and 'prove' you are not discriminating. Vote "Yes" and you will be liked by everyone on Social Media. Vote "Yes" and be part of history. Vote "Yes" and... "Don't be a fucking arsehole who clings to outdated values and beliefs and is not willing to extend the same freedoms to others you take for granted, you pathetic, bigoted, sad excuse for a human being!"

Yep. That's the message: Join us or stand in the corner, shunned and shamed- with the rest of the 'few' nay-sayers. Stand apart. In fact, let's just make sure you feel exactly like a minority. Let's name you and shame you- for standing up for your beliefs and your perceived rights to hold them.

This is being done in our schools. Kids as young as nine are asked whether two men or two women should marry and then are made to 'physically' take sides- Yes on one side, No on the other... and those unsure, in the middle. The teacher makes it very clear which side is the right one - since they've already learned in detail about the current 'injustice' and how this law will remedy it - under the guise of 'anti-bullying' lessons. (I read the full report and shuddered. I will leave the contents of this 'snuck into the curriculum without parental consent'  program for another time.)

So the kids are forced to publicly 'show their stance'. Most say Yes... because they have been taught this is the right answer (no issue from me up to this point.) Some few are still confused and plop themselves in the middle- where they are made to examine both sides and ultimately, choose one. But! Those who dare question - whether because of religious/community beliefs or some other, personal dissemination are made to stand apart- isolated from the group and in many instances, standing alone. Stories are surfacing in the news... in mainstream media. Young kids confused, bullied, made to feel like a minority. Young kids forced to choose the right side else face the consequences...

Adults in turn, verbally abused, physically beaten and in too many instances, hounded by a pack of rabid keyboard warriors. What the hell is going on?

Dylan... he, too, is inundated; in fact saturated, on campus and on Social Media. The pressure to "not be one of them" is immense.

"Mum, I am all for marriage equality. But I won't be made to feel guilty or ashamed should I not openly wave the gay flag or spout the rhetoric. That, is discrimination in reverse!"

I am afraid he is right. I am afraid that this much-needed law won't be passed in this country. Because I am seeing a startling effect: More and more people are... protesting the fact they are not being "allowed" the same freedoms those pushing for this law are so vehemently protesting their lack of: The right to hold an opinion and a belief. The right to stand on personal beliefs and not be excluded/discriminated against for doing so; Above all, the right to... equal rights without facing pressure/coercion/guilt/shame in the process of making a choice.

I am afraid that these pro-equality messages flooding in are having the opposite effect. Hot heads, loud accusatory mouths and pointing fingers do not attract and certainly do not convey the issue the way it should be conveyed. This is a legal matter. Emotions - no matter how hot they are running - should have been kept right away from the question. They were not. They were in fact made the question. We are not voting on whether to introduce new laws; we are in fact being told to state whether we are bigots... or not.

There's been little 'real, dispassionate' debate as to the legal implications- for example, for other minorities (apart from the jokes and ensuing heated commentary about... a man turning up and asking for a marriage licence for himself and his three 'partners' ... a couple and their pet dog... herself- because she is bi-polar... all sorts of nonsense as to "If they can, why can't I/we?") or the 'moral precedent' set by such a controversial issue- given the Church (and I include all religions here) is so anti-gay marriage and pro the traditional marriage model; highlighting again the impact of faith and its influence on the 'State'.

There's been NO debate/explanation about the rights of future children born into and bound by these new laws should they pass. I am not questioning whether a 'gay environment' is right or wrong for them in terms of thriving. I'm a single mum (another minority) who has successfully fulfilled both roles - least till now - so I know children can thrive in any love-based environment. What I am questioning is the precise nature of their future rights, in law. How can I vote for something without due diligence- and denied this vital information?

So here I sit pondering... Following a recent drive where a young woman in the back seat after some long minutes of expounding all about the 'need' to stand in solidarity with those discriminated against, said, to my frown in the rear-view mirror,  "Don't tell me you're one of those as well as a climate-change denier!"

Those?

Who are "those"?

I am a straight woman; both in favour of gay marriage and... equal rights. Suddenly, the two are not in sync. Suddenly, one is overwhelmingly negating the other. There's that itch in my brain to vote "Nuh"... in support of those copping a public beating for daring to voice that they are voting "Nuh". It's not their choice I stand for; it's their right to have one, without shame or any other form of reverse discrimination.

Because I am serious about equal rights. And because, in this instance, they are deemed to be afforded only to those protesting the lack of marriage equality. Not those opposing it. I see no equality in this current war- only increasing animosity towards those not falling into line. Those.

Am I wrong? Am I indeed one of those? Or does the phenomenon of 'reverse discrimination' indeed negate the original message? Can there be true equality if the means of achieving it in fact remove rights from one lot and afford them to another- thus creating a new 'minority' discriminated in turn, in the process?

What say you?