"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself."

4.

After leading Charlotte to my tent I tell her to get some rest and that she can bunk with me from now on if she wants. I then realized I need to get the water for Jasper, I go back over to the tent and walk in. I see Bellamy drinking some water from his cup.

"Hey." He says and pours himself more water.

"Hi, Bellamy." I grab a cup and fill it up with water. As I'm about to leave Bellamy stops me grabbing my wrist.

"A bunch of us are going hunting tomorrow." He says invitingly and I nod.

"I'm always down for a party." He smiles at my comment and I smile back and walk out. I walk back to the drop ship with the cup full of water and I climb to the second floor.

"The Grounders cauterized the wound. Saved his life." Clarke cleaned the area around the wound wiping away dirt and other things.

"Saved his life so they could string him up for live bait. Garden of Eden this ain't." Finn said making me laugh a little.

"This is infected. He could be septic. Any progress on using the wristbands to contact the Ark? Monty?" Clarke questioned Monty snapping him out of his head.

"That would be a firm no."

"My mother would know what to do." Clarke sighed. I could tell she was discouraged but I had an idea.

"How's he doing?" Wells comes up from the first floor of the dropship.

"How does it look like he's doing, Wells?" Clarke snaps at him.

"Hey, I'm just trying to help." Wells raises his hands in defense.

"I have an idea." I say and everyone looks at me.

"Wells, hold him down." I explain while I grab my knife from my boot and start to burn it in the fire right next to us till it's glowing orange. Wells and Finn are now holding him down while I take the knife away from the fire.

"I'm not going to like this, am I?" Monty stutters in the corner and I shake my head no.
I start to cut away all the infected parts of his skin and he starts to shout in pain.

"Hold him still! I need to cut away the infected flesh." They hold him down with more force so I can steadily do it.

"Stop it! You're killing him!" Octavia comes up and yells at me.

"She's trying to save his life!" Finn tells back at her while Bellamy comes up as well.

"She can't." He looks at me and shake my head. I don't understand him honestly.

"Back off." Wells stands up.

"Kid's a goner. If you can't see that, you're deluded. He's making people crazy." He tells us. I stand up and walk over to him after I finish cutting away the infected skin.

"If that was your sister in his place you would be begging us to do everything we could so I suggest you shut your mouth and leave him be." I clench my jaw and he stares at me. How can he be like this?

"Take a look at him, he's a lost cause." He totally disregarded what I had to say like always. Why do I even try anymore? Maybe I feel like he can change or maybe that I can change him.

"Octavia, I've spent my whole life watching my mother heal people. There's hope." Clarke says to Octavia and I nod.

"This isn't about hope, it's about guts. You don't have the guts to make the hard choices. I do. He's been like this for three days. If he's not better by tomorrow, I'll kill him myself." He yells and then climbs back down the ladder. I don't understand why he does this. He saved my life twice and now he wants to take a life? All for what? Because he doesn't think he will make it?

"You ready?" Miller walks over to me and asks.

"Yeah I got my stuff let's go." We walk towards Bellamy and the rest of the hunting party and we start to leave camp through the 'front' entrance of the camp. We've already started to build walls and in three days we've gotten so much done.

"I hope we catch something, I'm dying for meat." Miller talks as we walk deeper into the forest looking out for animals.

"You and me both."
We walk in silence for a mile longer until Bellamy sees something and tells us to get down. He points to something in the distance and I see that it's a boar. Bellamy gets up, ready to throw the axe at it but a twig snapping behind us causes it to run away scared. Immediately Bellamy threw the axe at the noise wedging itself in a tree right next to a little girl. Charlotte to be exact.

"Get him!" I hear one of the guys say while Miller and everyone except Atom takes off running after it.

"Who the hell are you?" Bellamy asks her and she walks toward us.

"Charlotte, what are you doing here?" I pull her close to me making sure she's okay.

"Well, what with that guy who was dying, I just... I couldn't listen anymore." She looks up at me with her big eyes like she's begging me not to send her back. I refrain from correcting her about Jasper.

"There's grounders out here. It's too dangerous for a little girl." Atom speaks up. Charlotte doesn't approve.

"I'm not a little girl." She crosses her arms and I smile.

"Okay then.." Bellamy pulls out a knife and hands it to her.

"But you can't hunt without a weapon. Ever killed something before?" He asks her and she shakes her head.

"Who knows, maybe you'll be good at it." He smiles at her and my heart warms at the site. I want this Bellamy, not just for a few sweet moments I want this Bellamy as our leader. Not the asshole who makes rude comments and wants to kill Jasper because he's tired of hearing him in pain. All of a sudden we hear a horn going off and we look around. I see yellow smoke coming right at us and something tells me it's not a good thing.

"Run!" I yell. I grab Charlotte's hand and we all run away from it not daring to look behind us.

"Come on! There are caves this way!" Bellamy shouts and I pull Charlotte along with me toward Bellamy and I continue running. Charlotte is now ahead of me and by Bellamy, we're almost to the caves when I trip on a tree root. I smack hard against the floor and pain shoots up my leg. I try to get up and run but my ankle only allows me to hobble slowly. Bellamy and Charlotte are already at the caves and Atom is nowhere in site.

I'm trying to go as fast as I can but it hurts to much, I see the fog coming closer to me and I try to keep going. All of a sudden I'm swept off my feet by Bellamy and were running towards the cave. We get there just in time but Bellamy gets burned from the fog on his hand just a little bit. He walks deeper in the cave and sets me down gently. I roll up my jeans to see my ankle is already bruised. I see Charlotte curled up in the corner and I hear Bellamy telling her to get some rest. Who knows how long we will have to wait in here for. Bellamy walks over to me.

"Are you okay?" He asks and I throw my arms around his shoulders and hug him. He just stands there at first but then he wraps his arms around me tightly and hugs back. My head is buried in his shoulder and I'm intoxicated with his smell, he smells of lemongrass and something uniquely him. I make it a quick hug and let go.

"You're always saving me." I shake my head.

"Well If you were dead, who else is going to put me in my place?" He says making the mood light and playful. I laugh at him.

"I can't seem to figure you out, Blake." I shake my head smiling.

"It's better that way." He tells me.

"I don't think it is." I look down at my shoes and I see his hand in the corner of my eye. It's red and I think it's starting to blister.

"Your hand." I grab it and inspect it closer.

"It's nothing." He pulls it back from me. I take my backpack off and dig around till I find what I was looking for. I grabbed a little can and opened it up, it was seaweed from a beautiful stream that I had discovered the other day while collecting sticks for my shelter. I had noticed the seaweed right away when I found the pound. It helps with wounds and burns, it helps them heal faster and helps with the pain. I grab a big enough piece out to cover his wound and we sit down on the cave floor.

"What is that?" Bellamy questions me.

"Seaweed, it will help your hand." I grab his hand and wrap it gently around the burn, I can tell it helped Bellamy already by the way he sighed and closed his eyes for a brief second.

"Thank you."

"It's the least I could do after you saved my life for the third time." I shrug and he smiles. It's rare to see him smile.

"How's your ankle?" He rolls up my jeans to
look at it.

"It's bruised but not badly, it will be good enough to start walking on in a day." I say and he nods.

"Guess I'll have to carry you back to camp." He jokes.

"That would be nice."

"Keep dreaming, princess." I laugh and so does he.

"You know you're actually pretty decent when you're not being a world class dick." I laugh and prop my leg up on my backpack to make it more comfortable.

"I'll take that as compliment." He says.

"Can I ask you something?" I wait for him to say something but all he does is nod.

"What did you do to get down here?" I don't expect him to answer but I needed to ask.

"Taylor-" he starts but I cut him off.

"Hey, you never call me by my name."

"I thought you didn't like being called princess." He smirks and I sigh.

"It's growing on me." I shrug and he laughs.

"I already told you it's bad."
He scratches the back of his neck, something I noticed he did a lot when he was nervous. He was being his true self with me, the really Bellamy Blake, the sweetheart.

"Bellamy, you can tell me." I place my hand on his and he looks down at my hand and looks back up to me.

"I shot jaha." He whispered.
I couldn't believe it, Bellamy Blake killed jaha. I don't know how to feel about it, I mean Jaha did float my mom but Bellamy being the one to actually kill him was shocking. I realized Bellamy is trusting me with this big secret and I need to stay calm.

"Does anyone else know?" I ask and he shakes his head.

"You don't have any questions?"

"No. I understand you did it for your sister. You wanted to protect her. Just like how I want to protect Jasper, he's like a brother to me." Bellamy nods.

"I'm sorry about everything I said about Jasper, I was wrong. I won't let anyone touch him." He said. This makes my heart warm and I was in the moment so I leaned over and kissed his cheek.

"Thank you." I whisper. We continue to stare at each other until Charlotte screams.

"No!" Bellamy rushes to her side.

"Charlotte, wake up." He nudged her shoulder and she wakes up.

"I'm so sorry." She whispers. It saddens me to see her so broken, she's just a little girl no matter if she says she's not.

"Does it happen often?" He questions and she just sighs which gives him all the answer he needs.

"What are you scared of? You know what? It doesn't matter. The only thing that matters is what you do about it." He tells her.

"But I'm asleep."
I watch the two talk and notice how good Bellamy is with her. All those years taking care of Octavia showed him a lot I guess. He's so gentle with her and his voice is so mellow.

"Fears are fears. Slay your demons when you're awake, they won't be there to get you when you sleep."

"Yeah but how?"

"You can't afford to be weak. Down here, weakness is death, fear is death. Let me see that knife I gave you." She grabs the knife from his pocket and hands it to him.

"Now, when you feel afraid, you hold tight to that knife and you say, screw you. I'm not afraid." He hands her back the knife and she hesitates until Bellamy nods.

"Screw you I'm not afraid." Bellamy gives her a look knowing she can do better and I can tell Charlotte understands because she repeats the words but with a much stronger voice and her voice doesn't quiver.

"Slay your demons, kid. Then you'll be able to sleep." He tells her and she goes to lay back down. Bellamy comes back towards me and sits by me again. I can't help but smile at him.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Princess.." He warns and I laugh.

"It's just you're so different when no one is around." I tell him and he raises his eyebrows.

"So are you, you just don't realize it." He says. I guess Bellamy is not the only one who puts up a front. Everyone looks at me like this badass who killed two guards for this amazing reason. Someone not to be messed with because of the things I've done but in reality I'm just as scared as everyone else down here. Everyone knows about my ex boyfriend Jack and how he trained me and they think I'm some indestructible person but I'm not. At the end of the day I just want to be told everything will be alright.

"You okay?" Bellamy breaks me out of my thoughts and I nod my head.

"Yeah, I'm just tired of everyone labeling me as a murderer. That's not who I am. I did what I had to do. " I sigh. I don't even know why I'm telling him this but I'm tired of keeping it in.

"I know that. Don't let people define you, princess. You're strong and brave and you're much more than your past." This time he takes my hand and squeezes and I squeeze back.

"Now get some rest, we'll probably be in here for another hour." He says and I nod. Deciding I can't get comfortable I decide to just rest my head on his shoulder. I feel him tense up but than relax. We're still holding hands and it's very comfortable and I feel safe.

"I hope the others found somewhere to ride it out." I sleepily say and close my eyes.

"Don't worry about that right now." He tells me and I start to drift to sleep.

"It wasn't enough, Grace, we need more or they will die." I hear my dad say from outside my door. They were acting so different lately and I didn't know why. My best chance was listening in to their conversations but I could never figure it out.

"I will try to get some today but guards have been on high alert near the medicine quarter. It's getting harder to sneak in and they will notice soon." My mom tells my dad. I can hear the worry in her voice and I know she's scared. What are they stealing and who's going to die if they don't get it?

"I know I know, but you know I already used up all my visits to get medicine from there. I have to go through the council if I need more. They are not going to let me get more." He tells her.

"I know. I'll go later today. They will be fine." She says to my dad and after that there was nothing. Later that day my mom was floated. She was caught stealing herbs from the medical wing and that was the end of it.

I hated my father for awhile thinking it was his fault, he should've stopped her but than I realized that what they were doing was good. My dad told me the truth, that they were trying to save sick farm station patients. They had become sick from the air in the station being polluted because of a certain crop that was grown by the science station. The only way to help them was to give them a particular medicine that my dad couldn't get his hands on so my mom stole it numerous times. The legal limit for the herb was only 3 grams. Which wasn't enough to save them and the council and the chancellor rather abide by the rules then bend them a little just to save people.

But when my mom died I decided I would take her place, this way if I get caught I would only get locked up as to if my dad were to do it he would get floated. At the time Jack was my boyfriend and we had been together for a few months, he had been training me to fight so maybe I could become part of the guard but that's never what I really wanted. But his training and workouts came in handy when it came time to steal. I did it around 6 times until he found out and snitched. I knew he couldn't be trusted with the information so I never told him. I got locked up that day he found out even though he had promised he wouldn't tell. Luckily it was the last of the herb and it was enough for the rest of the people who were sick to get better. So I'm glad I did it, I'm just not proud that I had to kill two guards while trying to do it. One of them I even knew because he was friends with Jack but I carry it with me now.

"I think she's waking up." I feel tugs on my hair but I keep my eyes closed.

"How do you know how to braid hair?" I hear Charlotte ask Bellamy. So Bellamy is messing with my hair, it almost puts me back to sleep but I stay awake wanting to hear them.
"I have a little sister and I always braided her hair." He tells her and I try not to smile at how cute that is. I can just imagine Bellamy through out the years braiding Octavia's hair and taking care of her when their mom is not there.

"I know you're up, princess." I hear Bellamy say and I can't help but smile and open my eyes.

"Busted." I say and he laughs. I grab my hair and it's braided into a neat braid going down my back.

"Nice work." I tell him and I think I see him blush.

"Hey, I helped." Charlotte interrupts as we laugh.

"Thank you."

"I think we're good to leave now, let me just make sure." Bellamy gets up and walks through the tunnel we came through and a couple seconds later he comes back.

"We're clear." He says and Charlotte stands up. I have trouble getting up but with the help of Bellamy I stand on my one foot.

"Can you walk?" Bellamy asks. I try to set my foot down on the ground and put a little force but pain sears up through my leg and I lift it I'm immediately.

"Not a chance." I huff.

"Charlotte, grab the backpack and I'll help the princess." Bellamy says. He puts an arm around my back and helps me walk while Charlotte is behind us.

"Now you're just overusing the name." I say.

"Shouldn't of told me you liked it." He shrugged and I laugh and shake my head. We walk through the tunnel and out of it into the woods.

"Atom! Miller!" Bellamy yells.

"We're over here!" We hear Miller call and suddenly Murphy, Miller, and two other guys, I have yet to learn their names come out in the open.

"Atom isn't with you guys?" I ask them and they shake their head.

"Are you okay?" Miller comes over to my other side and helps me.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just twisted it." I turn around to make sure Charlotte is okay but she's not behind us and I don't see her.

"Where's Charlotte?" I look to Bellamy and he looks around confused. Suddenly we hear a scream.