Happy 4th monthsary to us my zachireans! ❤️🎉🎊

_____

Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.

Proverbs 3:5

LIFE Is sometimes cruel.

When we thought that everything is into places, it is not.

When we already did our best but still wasn’t enough.

When we didn’t make anything wrong but being played by reality.

And when we’re seeking for love but hatred was given.

In this world, if you didn’t know how to fight your lose and if your not liked by everyone you’re abused.

It’s been more than a month when her Kuya Kenzo left her for work. Everything was normal except for the frequent quarrels of her parents which was heaped upon her. Like now she was in her room, silently studying when a loud noise startled her. Followed by shouts and things that are being shattered.

It’s not new to her. But sometimes she wishes that her parents will be fine again. Being scolded by her parents is fine with her than hearing them fight, shouting at each other.

Love is a strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties.

It is what websters say...

You’ll never learn how to love someone. Because you can feel it without even realizing. It is a strong emotion that can make you happy and sad.

Love is not full of colors. Love is no fairytale. It can sometimes make you feel weak and broken.

Love has no definition.

Because love is love...

A MAN in his late 50’s walks downstairs with a briefcase in his hand. His face is expressionless, but when he saw his wife softly humming their favorite song while cooking, his heart sank and started to beat rapidly. Slowly he's lips tugs up for a soft smile.

Years, decades had passed but their love for each other remains...it even became stronger. Day by day they fell in love with each other, over and over again.

Walking slowly to surprise his wife. He silently put his briefcase on the countertop and hug his wife from behind while giving some butterfly kiss to her nape.

The woman was surprised by her husband’s move. She doesn’t hear his steps that was coming. She was planning to surprise her husband with his favorite dish. Because he's been busy this past few days and stressed. Maybe, his favorite dish would make him happy and at least lessen his stress. Just like the old days...

In loving someone, you’ll never know if the one you are with now, will be with you ’til forever. Sometimes, the ones who are deeply in love even fell out of love.

Gently caressing his hand, she looks up only to welcome his husband's warm and lovingly ocean blue eyes.

Loving someone is like poison, once you take a dip...you’ll end up badly hurt. Having a cure to kill the poison, will take time to heal, in able to recover and start again.

While staring at those familiar orbs. A heavy emotion filled her heart, as long as memories appeared in her mind.

She smiled at her husband’s loving and worried face despite feeling heavy, then spoke. ”Their birthday is coming,” and when the chaos started. “Can we hold a party?” she asked hesitated.

Their fast heartbeats and heavy breathing filled the silence. And when her husband nods, she smiled and hugs him back, earning a soft chuckle from the latter.

With eyes closed, she slowly leans her head at his chest with a smile. “I just want to celebrate their birthday, even if they’re not here,” she whispered shakily.

He hushed and caressed her back. Making her feel that he’s here, that she’s not alone.

Burying his face at her neck, he softly whispered. “I love you, Mahal,” that even the strong storm can’t break my affection to you...

“CLASS DISMISSED.”

The once silent room turned into chaos when their professor left them. Chats and laughter’s enveloped the room, different kind of groups that was having fun conversing.

Some were doing make-ups, playing mobile gadgets, making fun of others, PDA’s, silently reading their books for the next class, and other things that students would do.

But one thing in mind and hearts...it is to graduate, achieve their dreams, and make their parents proud.

In the last row, Amber was staring at the window. Her mind is on somewhere else. She tried to drift her thoughts by reading stories but she can't.

Her friend Gold, was worried. She wanted to know what’s going on, but some things were not to known. We can never ask someone to tell us their problem if in the first place they don't want to.

We can never force someone, even if we said that we’re just worried. Because if they want, maybe they tell us in the first place, right?

So she let her be.

Well, she’s not the only one who keeps a secret anyway...

It’s been a long day for Amber, but she doesn’t feel good these past few days.

There’s this feeling that keeps on bugging her.

The feeling of emptiness, unloved, and untrust from the people around her...

The only people she trusts as of now, are her Kuya Kenzo and best friend Gold. They’re enough for her, she doesn’t want an additional. But how about King?

What!? No.

Not that she doesn’t feel thankful for being saved by him, several times. It’s just that—

I’m afraid that—

“Amber!”

Someone called her from behind, which makes Amber stop from her track and back to her senses.

Fixing the bag shes carrying, she looks back and was surprised when she saw Gio in his basketball clothes. He’s running towards her, sweat dripping from his forehead.

She wonders, what he’ll do this time?

She turns around, only to see a few students looking in their direction. So she looked down, ashamed for herself.

She can still feel the intriguing stares when white Adidas shoes, stop on her front.

Amber was not planning to look up, because she know it's just Gio, the guy who called her a while ago. When he offered his hand and speak.

“I’m sorry, Amber. I hope you can still forgive me.” loud gasps from students and whispers scattered the wide area.

Amber doesn’t want to be rude, so she accepted his hand and nodded. She can feel the tight grip from his hand, so Amber let go and turned her back, started walking.

“I’m really sorry about it, Amber. We're just having fun and turns out my friends—”

Amber closed her fist and eyes. Trying to stop her tears from falling. Ba’t ba palagi nalang ako ang napaglalaruan? Tao din naman ako, nasasaktan. Lahat na lang ba!?

“Okay lang,” Amber’s voice is tired, you can feel her pain. Kahit dalawang salita at walong letra lang ang sinabi ni Amber. Mararamdaman mo ang unti-unting pagkawala ng buhay nito.

Amber started walking away, he tried to wrap his head and speak pero parang pinagbuhol ang dila niya. Hindi sa wala siyang masabi, kun’ ’di dahil parang naririnig niya pa rin ang malungkot na boses ni Amber.

Nag-aalala siya, pero ano nga bang magagawa niya? Unang encounter palang nila ni Amber ay pangit ang kinahinatnan, baka nga hindi iyon naniniwala sa kaniya ngayon. Well, he’s known as the playboy in their university, kaya ’di na nakakapagtaka kung bakit ganun ang mararamdaman nito.

But he knew, he f*cking knew, that his doomed.

Malayo pa sa gate si Amber ng may maaninag siyang bulto ng lalaki, pamilyar ito sa kaniya. Nakatalikod ito at kausap ang guwardya na halatang natutuwa sa kausap, dahil panay tawa nito pero kalaunan ay nagseryoso.

Hindi niya nalang pinansin ang gwardiya at ang lalaki dahil nagbabantay pa rin naman ito sa mga lumalabas-masok, kaya ipinagpatuloy niya ang paglalakad para maka-uwi agad at makapag-isip-isip.

Lalalgpasan niya na sana ang mga ito ng may tumawag sa kaniya, this time pamilyar ang boses. Her breathing hitched and she stops walking, nagdadalawang-isip kung lilingon ba o hindi.

“Amber!” tawag ulit nito, pero hindi pa rin niya nililingon. “Agápi m- o-ouch!” this time lumingon na siya, to find out that King was being scolded.

“What!?” he hissed, annoyed.

“’Di ba sinabi ko sa ’yo na hindi ganiyan-” tumalim ang kaniyang mga mata kaya tinikom ng kawawang guard ang kaniyang bibig. Mas mabuting tumahimik nalang. Tama, tama. Baka mawalan pa ako ng trabaho nito...

“Amber,” he called while walking in her direction. He misses her so much, to the point that he directly goes to her school when he needed to rest first, from the meeting overseas.

Wala pa siyang pahinga sa dalawang buwan na trabaho, pero gusto niya munang makita si Amber. Just a glimpse would do, yeah. Glimpse only. But who is he kidding? Sulyap lang daw pero naglalakad na siya palapit.

Dalawang hakbang nalang sana at malapit na siya kay Amber nang umatras ito. Hurt passed through his gray eyes. He can see that she is scared at her presence, so he smiled.

Hindi man siya palangiti na tao, cold man sa iba, pero para sa taong may spesyal na puwang sa puso niya, ay ngumingiti siya.

“Uh-h-hh, ma-mauna na ’ko, King.” paalam niya dito at dali-daling tumalikod.

Ni hindi niya nakita ang isang luha na tumulo sa mata ni King. Pero bago siya makalayo, mahina man ang boses, rinig-rinig niya naman ang pinanggalingan ng sakit, sa boses nito.

“S-he, s-h-he is sca-re-d t-to me?” Hindi, hindi King. Ako ang natatakot sa sarili ko...

She’s not scared of him, she can say that and prove that. But she’s scared to herself.

She’s scared that one day, these strange feelings will make her disappointed, in herself.

Natatakot siyang dumating ang araw na hahanap-hanapin niya ang abuhing mga mata nito.

Hindi man niya masyadong kilala ang lalaki, alam niya sa puso at isip niya na ligtas siya kapag kasama ito.

Pero natatakot siyang magtiwala dahil baka iwan at paglaruan lang siya.

Natatakot siyang umasa at masaktan. Kahit iyan palagi ang ginagawa niya kapag kasama niya ang pamilya.

Natatakot siya. Takot na takot sa maaaring maging posibilidad na mangyari kapag hindi niya sinunod ang nasa isip niya.

She trusts God and prays that whatever this action leads her, will be good.

Thinking and giving everything to God, she sighs and erases her thoughts.

Too much for a long day...

_____

(≧▽≦)