Warning, I'm currently feeling reflective, it's the middle of the night, and I'm roaming my house. I can't seem to find a notebook, but I feel the need to write, and I've got my phone in hand. Not prince related, just rambling to clear my mind.

Life moves at a ducking ridiculous pace. Some things feel like yesterday. But it was more than half your life ago. Meanwhile I barely remember yesterday. Everyone is in bed right now. The house is completely quiet. Even the cats are asleep. But me, no, no sleep in sight for me. I'm too busy wondering if I'm doing the right things in life.

Here's a little known fact, I'm selling my house. Well technically I've sold it. All the paperwork has been signed and it closes the end of the month and there in lies the reason why there is no sleep for now tonight. But it's not just my house. This is the house my husband and I have shared for nearly 14 years. This is where my husband picked me up for our first date in 1998. I'm sitting exactly where I used to always sit when i needed to have a serious conversation with my dad, from when I was a kid up to the week before he died, this was my spot. This is the house where my father grew up, where my grandma had her first business. This house has been a sanctuary for my family and friends alike since the mid 1950's. Now it's going to another family to love and make memories in.

Selling was a good decision and it came right before the markets ranked, so that's worked out. Mom is happy to me moving to a smaller place with folks her age and no stairs. She's thrilled. The husband and I are excited to move, downsizing to an apartment and getting out of the city. And honestly getting out from under the constant upkeep on a 118 year old house. I don't have regrets about my decision, I know I made the right one. But still, there's just been so much here. My entire life has been here.

I know the family is ok with my decision. The spirits around the house have been busy lately with all the packing going on. Dad, grandma, grandpa, great grandma, cousins, I know they're all ok with this, I can feel it. The spirits that have been here my entire life, they're ok too. There is no negativity from anyone about all this. This house is filled with nothing but love and positive vibes. The walls are reverberating with memories and warmth. There's just something about tonight, guess I'm all up in my feels for some reason. Memories don't stay attached to buildings or things, we take them with us wherever we go.

Maybe it's nothing more than fear of the unknown, fear of the next step in the dark. I'll let myself experience this feeling, but just for tonight. Tomorrow is a new day, back to packing and preparing as best I can for this next adventure.

Side note, don't ever try to move in the middle of a pandemic.