"Is it true?" 

Namjoon raised his eyes from his phone, and in front of him was Jungkook, standing in the middle of the empty living room and staring at him curiously.

Namjoon blinked.

"Is what true?" 

Jungkook didn't look away.

"That you punched Hobi, a while ago. Is it true?" Jungkook's voice was weak and hesitant, like he was afraid to ask, yet he was risking it because he needed to know. 

Namjoon blinked again but didn't answer, instead he lowered his eyes back to his phone, as to avoid Jungkook's wide and expectant gaze.

But silence, for Jungkook, was enough of an answer.

"Why - why would you do that? Punch Hobi, out of all people? Hobi?" he whispered, visibly fearful of the justification that he wanted to hear.

Namjoon sighed loudly. 

Why did it came back to the fact that he punched Hoseok, two weeks ago? Why did it even matter, that he used to be angry and frustrated and jealous, and that he had taken it out on Hoseok, who was just there and who was just so much better than Namjoon?

Why did it always came back to the fact that Namjoon hated Hoseok? Does your hate for someone immediately turns you into a potential cold-blooded murderer?

And so Namjoon raised his eyes from his phone again, annoyed dark eyes that took Jungkook by surprise. But he didn't care, because he would make sure to settle this misunderstanding once and for all.

"I punched him because I hated him, okay? I hated him. I fucking hated him. Hoseok was always good at everything, and he always bragged about it... He was so fucking vain, so fucking annoying about his own exploits, and the fact that they were better than mine. Who fucking cares if his mixtape was more popular than mine? Who fucking cares if he's better at dancing? Who fucking cares if his parents call him everyday? That's why I punched him, because I hated him, okay? I fucking hated him!" Namjoon's strong and irritated voice filled the living room, and he had stood up as he spoke. 

He knew he was getting a little too angry, but he couldn't stand everyone asking him why, out of all people, he hated Hoseok. 

Jungkook looked away from his elder, taking a slight step back.

"Did you - did you hate him so much that he had to die?" he whispered again, this time in a pleading tone, a plead from a boy who needed a reason, an explanation, and, more than anything, needed his best friend back.

Namjoon rolled his eyes.

"For God's sake, I didn't fucking kill him, Jungkook. If I were to kill someone in this group, it would've been Hoseok. But I'm not a killer, and I would never kill, and I didn't kill Hoseok. I hated him, but I'm not a murderer. So just shut the fuck up about me having punched him, it doesn't have to do with anything. If you want to find out who fucking killed him, looked into who he wronged, not who disliked him for whatever selfish reason they had." 

Namjoon finished his rant, threw his phone on the couch behind him and crossed his arms.

Jungkook's eyes went wide.

"But Hobi - Hobi wouldn't wrong anyone. He was nice, he was trying so hard to be nice. He always wanted to please everyone, and he -" 

Namjoon sighed loudly, cutting Jungkook off.

"I've thought about it, for the last few days. Everyone keeps saying: why Hoseok? Why was it Hoseok who was killed? It's the thing they all wonder about. But isn't it fucking obvious, why it was Hoseok?" He narrowed his eyes, focusing on the younger who stared at him astonishingly.

Jungkook didn't answer, so Namjoon went on.

"Why does everyone here acts like Hoseok was so fucking perfect, all the fucking time, just because he's dead now? Hoseok wasn't perfect, Hoseok wasn't nice, fuck, he wasn't even tolerable sometimes! Everyone keeps acting like they don't understand why Hoseok, out of all people, would be killed. But it's fucking obvious why it's Hoseok, the dead one! It's always the one who want to please everybody, but that steps on souls and hearts on the way there. And sometimes he doesn't realize it, but other times he knows it very well, and he doesn't even care. That's why he's fucking dead, Jungkook. Because he cared about pleasing others, but not about others' hearts and souls." 

Namjoon finished his rant, staring deep into Jungkook's eyes, and he barely had the time to notice the pain in them before the boy closed them.

"He broke hearts, Jungkook, and he didn't even care," Namjoon repeated, emphasizing every word. 

A silence followed, and all that could be heard in the living room was Namjoon's eratic breathing and Jungkook's shaking hands.

"I know," Jungkook breathed out after a minute. "I know." 

Namjoon looked as Jungkook's torments painted themselves on his features, and as his body became more rigid and more fragile. Like he was made of porcelain, and like a single word could break him into a million pieces. 

And what if Namjoon said the wrong word? Would they then have another dead member? 

"JungKo - Kookie, what - did he, did he step on yours, too? Did he - what did he do to you?" 

Jungkook's breath hitched and he turned his head to the side, as to deny everything that would come his way. 

"He - nothing. He didn't do anything," Jungkook opened his eyes again, and Namjoon didn't miss the water that was slowly filling them. "Isn't it stupid? He fucking hurt me because he didn't do anything, and I loved him so freaking much, and he didn't do anything. Why, why didn't he do anything, Namjoon?" 

To say Namjoon was confused was an understatement. Jungkook had come into the room accusing him of hurting, and then killing Hoseok, and now he was pleading for a reason as to why Hoseok hadn't done anything. 

But what had Jungkook wanted Hoseok to do? 

"I - I don't know, Jungkook. Maybe he didn't know?" was all Namjoon could muster, because he wasn't sure he understood what Jungkook was talking about anymore.

Jungkook began slightly shaking. He wrapped his arms around his chest so he could hold himself together, trying to lessen the quivers that shook his body back and forth.

"But he knew. I told him, I told him and he knew, and he said, he said he didn't want to talk about it. And now he's dead, and his heart isn't alive anymore, but neither is mine, Namjoon. My heart is dead, too, because Hobi killed it, so why, why am I not with him right now? Why am I still alive, when he's dead? Why can't he be alive, still? Why, why did he die?"

Namjoon looked away from the quivering boy, closing his eyes in conflict. He wanted to be honest with Jungkook, but he also wanted the boy to stop crying. Yet Namjoon knew he had to choose honesty, honesty rather than trying to stop the bleeding from a wound that went too deep. Too deep for Jungkook to be okay, too deep for Namjoon to comprehend, too deep to scar within a few days, too deep to ever disappear completely.

"I think - no, I know this is why he died, Jungkook. Because he stepped on the wrong heart, this time. And the shattered heart had to stab back. And so he died, so another heart could live."

A sob escaped Jungkook, and he squeezed his eyes shut as tight as possible.

"Do you think Hobi would forgive that heart, if he were alive? Do you think - do you think he would still love that heart, even though the heart killed him because it was hurt?" Jungkook whispered, so low that Namjoon barely heard him. But he had, and the vulnerability in Jungkook's voice left him speechless for a second. 

"I - I don't know. I think he would. Hobi didn't care, and for that reason he always forgave, always. Even those who didn't deserve it."

And just like that, the tears overflowed from Jungkook's eyes, and they fell down his cheeks, his neck, his chest, his legs, his feet, until they reached the carpet and formed a pond under the boy who kept crying. And the arms that circled him and held him as he cried, those arms that were so strong and warm and comforting, those arms held him for a long time, until night fell. And when the heartbroken boy had no more tears left in his soul, he was carried to his bed by a boy who was now more confused than ever.

__________

A/N - Isn't Jungkook confusing AF? 

Also, please let me know if you know any good graphic designers. I love my current cover but it's a bit low resolution & the sizing isn't perfect so I am thinking of changing it. I don't know if having OT7 on it is better than only Hobi though?

Btw, if you have any story you're writing, let me know and I'll check them out! I've been looking for new stories :)