Rochelle's pov

My blinkers kept blinking as I turned on the window Wipers of my car when I saw my ex-boyfriend Tristan standing right in front of my car like a madman preventing me from seeing Mason at the hospital.

Come on Rosie! now wasn't the time to be wasting time talking to your ex not especially in this case where Mason was lying in the hospital alone with no one else besides his family members even though, we took a slight pause on our relationship I have already promised his mother who named Lynn that I would take care of him. I drove to the hospital that he was put in today as tears streams started pouring down my face whilst I remembered how much racing made him feel invincible why did he have to be racing those dangerous people if not for money then what would he gain from all of this fame title when I have finally arrived at the hospital I phone my mum in the car park waiting for her to answer the phone, sinking into my seat including resting my head on a car horn.

My heart was breaking right now.

At the moment we have so much unfinished business but it did possibly occur to me that the one thing that he does love will hurt him. Nobody had ever said to me that a love like this can hurt you deeply because he was my forever soulmate.

"Hey, mum, I really need some words of advice right now"I said sadly with tears in my eyes.

People has three different types of love according from what i have reads in books that there were classified as: first love being young and unsure of what you really want, then there was puppy love the sweet innocent kind of love that might not work out in the end. And lastly, the last one was the person who might not be your first love even though he still attends to your last love the really passionate, fun, person who will challenge you, love you for who you are despite all your flaws can see you for who you really are. The darkness was never scary anymore as long as i had him by my side encouraging me to  be brave and bold to never to be afraid of standing out from the rest of the world even if the world might be cruel or judgemental my people as in Jessasnym, Natalia, charlie, Avenna,  Flora,Vivanne, also the hockey team boys Would always be there me.

You can do this Rochelle! Just breathe and count to ten. Nooo it is not over yet we have so much left to do. I will have to fight the person who wrote about my fate as it can destroy  a person or it might make them increasingly happy anyways, the things about my family was Steven. We never give up no matter what the odds might look like to other people we believe in staying strong. I heard my mum's voice on the other side of my phone as her happy go-lucky voice soon began to change into a voice of concern, hearing me sniffing my nose and shaky breathing although she couldn't give me a hug that I craved and desperately needed at this point of time.

"hello RoRo...... what is wrong? Or Is it about love or life advice?"my mum asked me, concerningly, but I heard some amount of sadness in her voice.

Sometimes, I hate being the rock in my friendship group because nobody ever realized how much pain I was feeling inside, sleeping it all away until it comes again  the very next day and biting me in the butt for hiding it too much even though they were constantly on my side. I think i might be a little bit depressed but what for when i had very supportive friends, my mum and i now get along with each other then i suddenly remember why can't escaped in all of my books or music since all i could think about was whether or not that he would be alright additionally, i just wanted to turned back time to switch in the lights to erase all of our ugly moments nonetheless, life doesn't seem to work like that for anyone in real life which makes reality sucks twice as much as a bad book reviews on one of my favorite books or on my music covered videos.

Honestly, I feel like I cannot win in this world to have a balanced, happy life. What was I made for? I wasn't made to feel this much pain, agony, or sadness but if I did get the choice to choose who was my first love I would choose him and do it over all again because being with him was worth it. I know he didn't even mean to put us on a break as i recently, started to think that he was going through a lot of terrible events in his life and he did not want me to see the darkness that he was facing to keep me at bay in the lightness to make me feel happiness even if i was still determined to get those answers as in why he decided to put us on a halt for a while.

"A little bit of both of them, mum but I think I want to go home now." I said with a breathy and shaky voice.

"Close your eyes and listen when i say life isn't always going to be sunshine and rainbows but if you can imagine or picture yourself with one boy who would it be with?"asked my mum questioningly.

In this exact precise time, I shut my eyes thinking how my mum asked me this question: who could I imagine or see myself with and why this pain would be worth going through  me and him would be in together. To be honest, i see myself alongside him in the future growing old together just like the movies or not caring if everybody else was looking at us in public because to the worlds of heartache and lovers at night we were imperfect nevertheless, we were perfect  and made for each other neither way, i would go back to december when we first met each other at a properly as we were standing in the pouring rain outside in a car park near my car during it breaking down since the engine was dead. I want to change what happened the other night when we went on a break standing in front of his mum's house. Even those promises were made by me to his mum to never let him push me away from her son.

"Mum, how did you know dad is the one for you back then?" I required my mum to  tell me more about how her and dad happened.

A little string of laughter that my mum had let out which I could totally tell that she had a faint smile on her face when she had said "Hold up! We're not that old okay but anyway, he still proves that he love by showing up to my parents house as your dad turned up all soaking wet dripping from the downpour of rain and he had happened to learn to my parents native language Korean one of the hardest language in the world to learn-"

And then both of my parents began to speak back and forth with one another reminiscing their youthfulness times back when they were just young adults at the ages of seventeen- eighteen years old. My dad started to speak up about how differently he had remembered that night to my mum.

"Remember that I'm not just anyone Lin, my darling but let's just say that I told your grandparents  how much I love your mum and how they should cut her some slack too." my dad paused to rethink back to the day where he had won over my mum's parents like that. "I secretly mentioned to them how much I wanted to marry their daughter , your mother of course." said my dad.

Afterwards, i had finished listening to my parent love story i soon realized the time had gone by when i only had an hour and a half to spare until his hospital visits were over next, i planned to catch up the rest of our conversation with my parents tomorrow as they both seem to be in a very deep conversation for now, i smiled and said "see you tomorrow mum and dad."

Twenty seconds after I left my car to walk straight toward the hospital and then went through the doors heading to his hospital room where he was pronounced unconscious by the doctor was what his mother told me when I arrived outside his room. She pulled me into a hug not being mad at me for visiting him in the hospital room sooner because she understood that we were on break from seeing each other but then she frowned as she saw me crying in tears in front of her.

"He woke up but still refused to eat without seeing you first." His mother said with an understanding smile.

That stubborn hockey player of mine but I was still thankful for him being alive.

Quickly, I rushed towards him in his hospital and began to cry tears of sadness and relief into one before i saw him as well as chuckle a little bit at the sight of me then he stopped when he saw me crying. "There, there.... Let it all out of your emotions my fearless songbirdie girl." he pulled me into a hug whilst my tears keep falling down my eyes landed on his hospital gown as i wanted to believe that our little  fantasy would lasted longer than a reality world however, we all know that once the pages in the books were closed in seven hundred and fifty pages book were done it will suck us back into reality.

"Why did you let me go?" I asked him heartbreakingly.

My tall hockey player Mase was leveled to my height as he was sitting up on his bed no matter how many times i or the doctors had tries to protest that he should probably get some rest as he began to stretched i saw a patch of his skin that lead all the way to his v-line which was really affecting my level of concentrations in here. Right focus or else you might be hurt by accidentally busted a stitch on his body.

"Because i guess that there is a fine line in me hating my father so much into believing that i hated myself too because i have the same anger that is burning deep inside of my core." he caressed my cheek as he whispered "you are my melody, songbird, sun, stars and the moon so i was trying to prevent myself from hurt you since i go into self destruction mode whenever life get too bad for me." he explained everything to me.

The real truth was my heart was in fact pounding fast in my chest as i braved to asked me this question as to never in my whole life i had i ever care if a boy love me or not but Mason Avery was a special kind of breed of boy get me like nobody else did even though this fierce kind of love from the love can't choose to run away from because all i can do  was to accepted it by bracing it with loving opens arms and pray that this type of love doesn't break me into two part leaving me so torn up that nobody would be able to fixed me back up again. 

Vulnerable was a rarest type of emotion which some people were afraid of yet anything with him made it super easy to be myself.

"Do you love me? Because I am willing to go through the sunshine or rain of waterworks just for you. You better believe me when I say that I want you to be open with me for now. if you go through the hurricane of  your life then we both weather through the storm togehter.'' I told him truthfully, leaving my heart open to him.

Oh my days, I cannot believe that his heart rate was speeding up so quickly that I was freaking out for the two of us that his heart might  just explode all over us as I heard the repetitive beeping on the heart rate machine.

"Of course, I love you to the pucking stars and back, Rochelle Roshi Steven. I think about you constantly in my dreams, in class, in hockey practice every twenty four seven. And yet I have wanted you since the first time I saw you.

Always craving your  gorgeous body, spectacular mind and incredible soul when I first got a chance to know you" he laughs and sounds like he was in a slight bit of pain. "and that day that pucking Tristan broke up with you including, breaking your heart.  I had never wanted to punch anyone except him for being a cheat." he exclaimed his love for me.

I didn't need any more confirmation as I bit my lips whilst thinking of how much I wanted to kiss him. "I love you too, Mason Avery but I'm going to make you work for it." I replied back to him.

He pulled me in for a passionate kiss and then when we were about to pull apart, we turned around to see everyone's faces smiling and he whispered " I wouldn't want to have it any other way." He held onto my hand.

At the end of the day I ended up staying with him in his hospital room eating a slice of celebratory cakes that our friends had brought as a get well soon present for him since all was forgiven but not forgotten by me.