There was a yellow bird. His feathers ever so cleaned and glistening.

AND THEN A CAR SMASHED GILBIRD IN THE FACE!!!

The tall awesome sexy man saw this and picked the bird up. He knew it would die. So he tried to save it. He...

THREW IT IN THE GROUND.

THREW IT ON THE BED.

THREW IT ON A TOWEL!!!!

And then it came back to life.

Story time, With Prussia.