https://youtu.be/5qF_qbaWt3Q

This is not the end, This is not the beginning.

I sent punch after punch at the training dummy I chose to let out my wrath on. Each swing making a dull thud as I landed my fist on it's soft chest.

Just a voice like a riot, Rocking every revision.

Sweat was dripping down my face, soaking my tight (f/c) tank top, cascading down my cheeks and neck, but I didn't care. I didn't even notice.

But you listen to the tone, And the violent rhythm.  

My music blaring loudly, drowning out all sounds as I kept pelting the poor dummy hanging on its chain. With each old memory, I swung an even harder punch at the defenseless human imitation. But it was not working. The memory's wouldn't go away.

And though the words sound steady, Something empty's within 'em.

Ever since yesterday, when my father talked to me, memories started flowing back. Mainly, it was because of stubbornness. Otherwise, it was because I realized how long it's been, yet how short that timeline was in comparison with the rest of my life.

We say Yeah! With fists flying up in the air

I thought back, because I needed reasons. Good memories to outweigh his logic. It wasn't fair to force me into doing something I don't want to... but now I lost control over the flood and I can't make it stop.

Like we're holding onto something That's invisible there,

But I guess we kind of shared that, right? He wouldn't let me choose, and I didn't let him explain. I shook my head slightly, eyes trying to focus on swinging. I swallowed and squeezed my eyes shut as the memory sprung up.

'Cause we're living at the mercy of The pain and the fear

I thought about the day the proxies brought me to the mansion, and how I snapped at my father. How I screamed, how I ran, how I came crawling back. I growled and punched the dummy, trying to focus on my training.

Until we get, forget it, Let it all disappear.

I thought about how I was dragged into all this. This war between 'Pastas. I don't want to be here. I want it to end. I want all the pain and suffering I caused to everyone to end. I just want it all to stop.

Waiting for the end to come, Wishing I had strength to stand

It seemed like just yesterday that I met the proxies, when my life was relatively normal. When I was all over the place, and when I smiled without worry. I never thought it would've worked out like this. Never in a hundred years. 

This is not what I had planned, It's out of my control

I snarled, then took a step back, my knuckles red and raw from punching. Flexing my fingers a few times, I glared at the dummy as if it's the reason for my anger, then grabbed a knife on a nearby weapons rack and attacked the sack of fluff again without a moment of hesitation.

Flying at the speed of light, Thoughts were spinning in my head

I slashed at it, shredded it, destroyed it, and thought back to my mother. Even though I couldn't remember that much anymore, I missed her. My childhood felt foggy, unreal. As if it's a whole different world. She left this world too soon...

So many things were left unsaid, It's hard to let you go

I sniffed and gave a cry of anger, stabbing the dummy over and over, then started slowing down a bit, a dull pain starting to manifest itself in my biceps. I wonder if I would've turned out the same if she stayed alive. I wondered if I would've met the proxies if she still lived.

I know what it takes to move on, I know how it feels to lie,

I threw the knife down as soon as the dummy started falling apart, fluff and material littering the floor, then moved on to the next and grabbed a baseball bat with nails hammered into its end.

All I wanna to do Is trade this life for something new, Holding on to what I haven't got

I slammed my new target with as much force as possible, swinging out all my anger onto the worn out human imitation.

Sitting in an empty room, Trying to forget the past

I gave a cry of frustration, still going as hard as possible, ignoring my screaming muscles and letting my anger drive me further, letting my wrath distract me.

This was never meant to last, I wish it wasn't so

Unintentionally, I thought back to first time I met the proxies. To how they randomly showed up at my door, masks and all, while I was recovering from a manic episode. One of my favourite memories.

Yeah, yeah, What was left when that fire was gone?

I thought to when Alex burned my house down. To when he kidnapped the three boys right when I made up my mind. I thought of how much I wanted to kill him. So much rage and anger burning inside me, because of him. So many problems because of him.

I thought it felt right but that right was wrong, All caught up in the eye of the storm

I thought about how confusing it was when I realized they were fighting over me. I thought about how I felt when I realized that my father has always been there for me, but I forgot all about his visits.

And trying to figure out what it's like moving on, And I don't even know what kind of things I've said

I thought about how I screamed, how I yelled. I thought about how they held back secrets from me when we got out of the warehouse. How everything was an illusion, and how we seemed to have traveled through time and space.

My mouth kept moving and my mind went dead. So, picking up the pieces, now where to begin? The hardest part of ending is starting again!

I slammed the dummy as hard as I could, then threw the bat to the floor and fell to my knees, looking down at the cold wooden boards below me. I thought about how all of that is going to start all over again. How I'm going to have to fight those guys again. How I'm stuck in another war.

All I wanna do, Is trade this life for something new, Holding on to what I haven't got

I became aware of the warm tears slowly and silently trailing down my cheeks, my expression neutral and blank. For the first time this entire night, after spending my time ruining dummies and my hands, the first optimistic thought popped up in my head.

'At least the right choice is clearer to me in this war...'

~ Slender's PoV ~

Slender was standing at the doorway, watching [Name] throw the bat to the floor, then crumble to her knees. He sighed and shook his head slowly, walking away again. He was trying hard not to feel guilty, knowing it's his fault that she felt like this. He didn't need to read her mind to figure that out. It seemed like time was slowing down as he dragged his feet back to his office, feeling like he was walking through mud, deep in thought, but with only one thought in mind.

'I need to make her understand...'

Silently, he reached the end of the hall and paused at the door, his long, pale fingers resting on the handle. With another sigh, he opened the door and walked in, going straight to his desk. He sat down in his chair and stared blankly at the papers that were piled on top of his desk.

'Does she know that he used to be a rebel, as well?', he thought. 'Does she know that he'd easily turn on someone if it meant surviving...? Why won't she understand that I disapprove of things for a reason?'

His thoughts were interrupted when someone knocked on the door. He looked up, then extended a tendril to open the door. Standing at the door was the twitching Proxy, Toby. Toby has changed, much like the others. The circles under his eyes were darker, and his hair was even messier than it usually was. Slender gestured for him to come in and Toby shuffled in without hesitation and tiredly plopped onto a chair. He seemed relieved to be sitting down again.

"I have news, Sir" he said. Slender tensed at his words. Toby only ever used 'sir' when he had bad news or did something wrong.

"...What is it?" he asked, a hint of nervousness in his voice.

"We spotted Alex, along with some of his fellow... rebels, when we were out scouting, you see? The disappeared before we could attack, but I'm pretty sure it was... those guys" he said.

Slender felt cold. He swallowed and started fiddling with his pen, staring at Toby as one word rang in his mind.

        "The Collective" he muttered

Toby nodded once, then adjusted his goggles.

"They've returned"